Intrusive Thoughts (Trigger Warning)

Never heard of this but what an excellent tip! Thank you for sharing. Hope it helps the Op it sounds great a bit like reframing it in your head

I've experienced intrusive thoughts for a few years. It's been horrific in the past but i cope much better now. I read about a technique once which I found really helpful. I'm not actually sure whether it's a technique recommended by therapists or if someone just made it up. Basically you accept the thought and 'let it in' rather than try to block it out. But change the frightening part of it to something similar but not scary. Eg change being threatened with a knife to competing in a fencing tournament. Change drowning in the sea to having an exciting ride on a dolphin. I know it sounds crazy but it honestly works.

I can identify with this 100%, including the sexual/violent thoughts towards my child. This only ever began once I'd had my son and it was terrifying. I remember thinking things like whaybwoild happen now if I pushed the pram infront of a car ornifni drove my car into that tree etc. It freaked me out. I was way too ashamed to discuss it with anyone and like you, I would need to shake my head literally to try to stop the thoughts.

I never sought help for it as it gradually eased up and I also began to read things about intrusive thoughts and Pure O. I also would never in the world consider myself someone with OCD but I don't care about what umbrella term it comes under, I I was just glad I was normal and this was a relatively "common" thing.

Not read the responses to see if this has been mentioned but I am extremely knowledgeable on OCD. No matter what the thoughts make you fear they say NOTHING about you as a person. You receive intrusive thoughts as alarm signals from your brain when you're in a state of anxiety in your nervous system. The thoughts can come as visual images, false memories, thoughts, urges ( completely different to urges we feel in normal day to day life ) and statements as opposed to 'what if' questions. The reason is because your nervous system believes for whatever reason you're under threat of danger. It explores things that disturb you most via parts of your brain you're not in control of. It is not your fault and nothing to do with your character. Lots of people experience a loss of self when suffering with OCD as you're in this chronic state of disgust and fear all the time and your actual personality is basically on a time out. Also, our subconscious is wired to follow patterns of thinking and a big change such as a new person to look after or responsibility can shake that and cause and OCD flare up. This isn't forever I promise. Please look up Ali Greymond on YouTube, Nathan Peterson on You Tube and get the app 'nocd'. Worth googling a brain scan of an ocd brain vs a healthy brain also. I know it's lonely but you will be okay I promise. Before I was an OCD expert ( who now gives all of my free time up to helping those suffering) I was crippled by it. I can't even remember how OCD felt anymore as my brain is back to normal, you will get there too. If you ever need help please message me, OCD isolates us so much but it's so much more common than you think. Praying for your recovery.

PLEASE don't go down the rabbit hole of assuming intrusive thoughts are a sign of OCD on the basis of a few posts. OCD is linked to intrusive impulses and rituals, not thoughts. They are normal and are not indicative of any mental illness. See the video I linked earlier.

Hi, please speak to your GP. I’m so sorry you are suffering with this. It’s hellish. I don’t think you are any risk to your daughter.

I had OCD and intrusive thoughts 9 years ago. I was an absolute wreck. I took citalopram and had CBT therapy and it made a massive difference.

best wishes for recovery. And you will recover

I'm so so sorry you are feeling this way OP, have you spoken to your doctor?

I was diagnosed with ptsd in 2013, over a year after i escaped domestic abuse, it took me a year to get to the Dr or any help, and I ended up with a lovely social worker who really helped me in so many ways. Up until that point my sister kept me alive, she's the only reason I'm here today. I can't remember much from that time.

I finally got my life back together and I got pregnant in 2016 and I started having vivid, terrifying dreams, they were so real and I would think about them all the time I was awake, they included the domestic abuse and also when I was raped and it brought it all back, it was like reliving it all again. I must have told the midwife (I had to explain why I'd previously had a social worker) so I had counseling just after my daughter was born for a few weeks.

I really struggled to be honest, my daughter barely slept and my partner (her dad) worked long shifts so I felt alone a lot and to make matters worse I couldn't go anywhere without desperately needed the toilet so I developed anxiety about that to the point of obsession. When I went to the Dr he said that it is normal for that to happen in the first year after birth so I didn't seek further help, which I regret.
I started having intrusive thoughts when she was around 1 year old, things like walking down the street I would imagine the cars would drive in to us or if she had a temp then it would be fatal and it was actually an incredible Dr who noticed I was very anxious at an appointment for dd and she helped me recognise that what I was feeling wasn't right. My manager at work had noticed too and said his wife was the same and supported me taking time off work while I went on anti-depressants. The anti-depressants were awful at the start and I had suicidal thoughts but I kept telling myself these were not my thoughts and I couldn't leave dd and 2 months later I felt OK and it all stopped and I went back to work. I didn't know that I should have told the dr about the suicidal thoughts and tried another anti-depressant.

I still had my toilet problem though and that was hell, a huge trigger was public transport, sometimes it would take me 2 hours to make a 30 min bus journey to work because I had to keep getting on and off to find a toilet and I had cbt therapy for a few months but the best advice the therapist gave me was to do something nice just for me. At that point I hadn't gone shopping or out for dinner and barely socialised unless it was a class for dd because of my anxiety over the toilet so it was a wake up call to care about myself too. I bought a bike and started cycling to work and after a few weeks I was very fit physically because it was such a hard route to get to work but I felt amazing and my toilet issue vastly improved and I got rid of the public transport trigger altogether. I stopped taking the anti-depressants after a year and I honestly think it was all the exercise from the bike.

I wonder if your work might have specific counselling for ptsd for the things you saw at work and you are now reliving?

I hope you get the help you need soon, you are not alone ❤

Hi OP,

You are not alone 💕

There are a number of threads about intrusive thoughts on Mumsnet, and I've noticed them growing.

I wonder if it's because more women are using platforms like this to ask for help, which is a really good thing.

My children are adults now, I had intrusive thoughts when my youngest was 3.

I got help and haven't had them for years and years now.

Have a look around the site or a Google for some of the more recent posts. You're not alone, you're not mad and there is 100% help available.

I used to have intrusive thoughts of violent acts against myself for about two years. It was very unpleasant and related to some huge emotional stuff I was dealing with at the time. I also have a history of dealing with lots of traumatic things through my job. It took me a while to pluck up the courage to ask for help and but had some sessions with a psychiatrist and they went away quite quickly. I hope you get some help too as it’s a rotten thing to go through.

I’m having CBT at the moment and the therapist gave me a list of common intrusive thoughts. Yours are on there so you’re not unusual. There were lots I was quite shocked to even be asked about and actually made me think mine were quite tame. Intrusive thoughts are definitely linked to OCD and anxiety. I suffer myself.
You can self refer to mindsmatter for therapy/CBT but yes see your GP too.

It sounds like 'pure o' OCD. I had it a decade ago, where I'd get frequent intrusive images of my family and boyfriend at the time dying in accidents.

Mine was caused by being on too high a dose of lithium, which can cause ocd.

I think their point, though I’d agree poorly put, is that the term Pure O can falsely create an idea of there being no compulsions by suggesting there is no “C”. Which is false, because the compulsions are internalised.

I do agree with you the label was useful to me in understanding what I was going through. I guess I’m just trying to find s charitable i teepee ration of their page.

This video will give you a balanced and non hysterical view on intrusive thoughts and how to deal with them;

My thoughts would often be quite focused on individuals. Particularly my mother.

Re www.ocduk.org/ocd/pure-o/ I wish I had read that closely. I actually don’t agree with them. Without the label pure o I would never have recognised my brains responses as internal compulsions

Hi there,

I’ve created an account just to post here.
what you are going through sounds very much like a version of OCD called “Pure O”. It’s not uncommon for it to be triggered by the birth of a child.

the first thing I want to say is: recovery is completely possible. We are actually better at treating OCD with the right kinds of therapy than many if not most other mental illnesses. There is a more targeted type of therapy called Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy.

id also like to tell you a bit about my own journey in the hope it can make you feel less alone.

I suffered for a long tIme with very similar thoughts, since a teen, and didn’t understand they were OCD because I thought it was just about cleaning and counting and stuff. My head used to be filled with a lot of very disturbing images that were incredibly vivid that involved violence or sexual harm towards my loved ones and friends and I essentially became a recluse because I was so worried that they were secretly urges even though they repulsed and disturbed me. I probably suffered for about 15 years before I accidentally stumbled across an article.

eventually I found my way to a wonderful U.K. charity called OCD Action and I joined one of their phone support groups. I believe they even have one especially for new mothers. It was probably months before zi could share my own stories but ai cried for days after listening in to my first group. Just knowing I wasn’t alone and that there was a way forward.

id done a lot of CBT over the years (never actually opening up about my thoughts, to be honest) but with a way forward I managed to find someone near me who was licensed to do ERP and with about six months of hard work I can’t believe the differences. I’ve been actually enjoying living for the first time these past two years.

Please join a support group and listen in. You are going to be ok. I promise you don’t have to always feel this way.

Hi, my daughter suffers from intrusive thoughts, and was referred CAHMS . She was diagnosed with Ocd, and intrusive thoughts can be part of this. The thoughts are often the opposite of your true thoughts and feelings. She found the thoughts extremely distressing. The doctors advised exposure response therapy, and learning to accept the thoughts rather than fight against them. It has been a really difficult time but she is now a lot better, and the thoughts are few and far between. I notice that they get worse during periods of stress.
You could speak to your GP, and ask for some help with things. With the right help, it will absolutely get better. It's such a sensitive subject, as the thoughts are often about taboo subjects. It's actually quite common, but not often talked about. Hope you get the help you need.

There are 3 or 4 of those videos be Dr Steven Phillipson. I second going to GP. www.ocduk.org/ocd/pure-o/ That Dr Phillipson reassured me that I wasn’t a danger to society despite the shitty thoughts in my head. This can be treated and discussed . Print out your relevant info and take it to GP. You appear to have insight which means you know the difference between the thought and the action, and you have indicated that you would never act on the thought.

This is a form of OCD. It can be triggered after having a child too and it can subside or not.
I have lived with what you describe my whole life. I went to the GP at 18 but had it from an extremely young age. I take medication for it which I am happy to talk about. You need to see you GP asap and remember there is nothing they haven't heard. Intrusive thoughts are just that, thoughts. I fully understand how terrifying they can be but the likelihood of you ever acting upon then are 0%. OCD is a horrible disorder but you can learn to live with it and once you understand the triggers / reasons you will hopefully be able to move on and learn how to live with it if not eliminate it. It could also be hormone related. I am so sorry you are experiencing this as I know how terrifying it feels. Stay strong and see the GP. Take someone with you and know that it's okay to cry xx

Google Pure O (OCD without the compulsions/rituals) this sounds very much like this disorder. It's treatable through, there's hope! Help is out there, you don't need to keep suffering this way. Start with your GP.

Can I ask @NavyCurtains & @Knockmealdowns do you / did you feel as if the thoughts were actually telling you to hurt a particular person eg. And you are / were constantly fighting the command to hurt that person??
Because I had the above problem and I'm now on a high dose of anti psychotics and the thoughts have stopped. My psychiatrist has diagnosed me with Schizoaffective disorder for mainly other reasons but I did tell him about the thoughts.
I am a very caring person and I found the thoughts very disturbing. I would not ever want to deliberately hurt anyone but I was terrified that I would give in to the thoughts.

Therapist here.

those types of intrusive thoughts are the most common we hear in OCD, if you track the content through history they follow society’s biggest taboos.

the main thing is you need to not react to them at all, just treat them as really boring and insignificant. If you try and block them out or neutralise them in any way they just feel worse.

it’s super common and treatable so please don’t worry. If you work for emergency services you might be able to access therapy through work, otherwise make an appt with your local IAPT service, you can self refer and don’t need to see a GP first or anything.

I was told by a therapist that when you have intrusive thoughts, it's your brain showing you the exact opposite of what you actually want to happen. That helped me a bit.

I really don't want to say much but yes I do and I have had really disturbing dreams which I feel heartbroken about. I hope in time I will forget them but like the thoughts the memory randomly pops in my head. I have no idea what triggers them if anything but it's so sad. I love my son very much and wouldn't hurt a hair on his head.