Splitting the bill

Very awkward. How much I total are we talking about. Would host friends be able to say I've calculated it's x divided by four and see what the difference is between what's she's offered and what it is?

Agree, what if this friend was on a budget so keeping costs low, while other friends ok with money so expensive drinks food = high tips. Should budget friend have to split the tip for the expensive stuff?

I would not be letting her get away with that and would forcefully tell her that the rest of the group will not subsidise her and she needs to pay up. Then I'd step away from the friendship.

@Conkersareback the OP literally said the friend but the bag on her credit card.

I think you've missed the point about the tips and fares. She maybe can't afford to pay them all off right now in cash. If she'd have paid for all of her own things she could have chosen what to or what to not pay for.

But she did "forget" some items? Which unsurprisingly worked in her favour?

Also the designer handbag was bought, you're assuming on a CC, no evidence of that.

I would say if you're that hard up for money that you won't pay your fair share, credit card or not, designer bags are out of your league.

Interesting that you think she'd be happy to pay the interest over twelve months, but not her share of tips and fares.

@Conkersareback I'm not one of those people, but I don't think this friend necessarily is either considering the OP hasn't suggested that she's been like this before

Exactly three people do think less of her, justifiably!

Do you that argument for not paying towards petrol when friends give you a lift? Well you were going that way anyway, so it's not cost you anything.

Unfortunately, we all have one of ""those" friends, we talk about you to others and don't like the way you treat us.

We think less of you, sponging off others and never, ever the ones to offer a lift.

On a credit card. If she's paying her friend back she can't do that on a credit card, but she could have used it for her meals etc whilst there.

She may well have budgeted to be able to spend £500 plus the bag and pay it off over the next 12 months. That's not the same as having to find £500 cash to give to your friend.

Don't reward her stingy behaviour. Definitely tell her she needs to pay her share of the tips and whatever she's 'forgotten' to include. Tell her the total and that she needs to pay!

@girlmom21 Not so much of a budget that she couldn't buy herself a designer bag though, eh?

I’d take this as a lesson to either not go on holiday with her again or use a different approach next time.

And the really sad thing is that someone’s good opinion of you is priceless and now she has 3 people who are important to her who think less of her.

How is it low and mean if she's on a budget @WindyHedges ?

She'd have been left on her own in an unknown country if her friends had taken the taxi without her and they'd have paid the same price anyway. That argument makes no sense.

She is wrong if she did things, but now won’t pay for them. She might have wanted to walk, but she didn’t. She went in the taxi.

And not wanting to pay her share of the tips is just downright low and mean.

She’s been mean and dishonest. What sort of a person treats friends this way?

That should have said tips not time!

Your friend is BU - massively. I don’t see why she allowed the host to pay and ask for reimbursement if she was going to question all costs (time, differences in drink prices, etc.)

Host should not be out of pocket but you pay your costs and leave it down to the host to chase. That way Hirst will know whether she wants to be a host to your friend in future.

Totally!

Jesus, totting everything up (but forgetting some bits!)

I'm not a fan of tipping when in the UK, but I understand when you visit different places, expectations and culture is different.
I generally prefer to walk places too, but if you are with someone with mobility issues, then clearly you accommodate that, and do it without resentment. This is presumably a friend ? Seems an odd way to be thinking about accommodating a friend for a few days on holiday.

Now I agree with most - this was always going to end in tears and an upfront kitty would have been MUCH better, but I still think your friend is BVU (ie, YANBU). If you go anywhere with a group, it is inevitable people will have different ways of spending and saving. You have to relax and go with the flow a bit. It you genuinely can't afford it, and have scraped together the cost of the flights, then you discuss that up front, apologise, and offer not to go, then wait and see if your friends still want you to come when they know you are on a shoestring budget.

How much was the tip on bill of $20?

Wow I wouldn't expect a repeat invitation back..sounds like a grim holiday. Was it Singapore?

Op! Did she get in the taxis? Did she say at the time she wouldn't be contributing to tips? We need more info please

Agree that the idea was a bit stupid to start with, it's not 1995, there are loads of cards that don't charge for overseas transactions or always cash.

I'd message tightwad friend and say what you've said here, i.e. 'You've forgotten to add x, y and z, and I think it's really cheeky that you've decided now you're not going to pay towards a tip - whether you agree with it or not it's customary in x place (usa?) and you should have said at the time if you didn't agree. If you pay less you realise me and y are going to have to cover your share as well as our own . I didn't even drink so technically I should pay even less but I wouldn't dream of being that petty. It seems really tight to squabble over this when we saved so much money by staying at Z's rather than a hotel.'

If she gets annoyed then is that someone you really want to stay friends with? and if you and knee op friend cover her share yourself, will the resentment affect the friendship anyway?

In fairness I do think knee op friend should have perhaps offered to put a bit more towards the taxis as they were primarily for her benefit, cost would have been the same had she gone in it alone or all of you, and a few taxi rides could add up to a fairly significant amount. Plus it sounds like she was also drinking the most expensive drinks out of the 3 of you.

It would so set me on edge not knowing how much I'd spent. I'd much rather just used my own card.