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AIBU?

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Original poster

Argument with DS1

30 replies

TheSummerHolidaysMakeMeCrazy · 05/10/2022 17:00

I really can't work out if I'm unreasonable here or my son was.

DS1 is 18 and lives at home while going to uni. He didn't have classes today so was playing on his PS5, I knocked the WiFi off while he was mid-game and he blew up. Telling me I don't listen (as I shouldn't have messed with the WiFi mid-game), really raising his voice so I told him not to talk to me like that and it was out of order. He then told me 3 times to "get out" [his room].

I then went downstairs and text him that I understood he was frustrated but he was not to talk to me like that. There was general back & forth but I said no matter what, he can't speak to me like that. He then said "I don't care", so I replied "you know where the door is".

So, he's gone, packed a bag and off to Leeds where his girlfriend is in halls.

He's stressed as he didn't do as well as expected in his A Levels and has to do an extended course to get onto his chosen degree. As it was through clearing he missed out on accommodation so he's feeling left behind.

But, how much leeway does he get for that. I'm kicking myself for the door comment but I can't allow him to speak like that, he's 18 fgs.

But i feel do guilty because of all the frustration and how scared he is, he just took it all out on me.

God that's long.

Was IBU?

OP posts:
Untitledsquatboulder · 05/10/2022 17:43

Honestly, perhaps the door comment was best avoided but YWNBU to insist he treat you with respect.

It's a shame his A level results weren't what he wished but there's no relation bw that and shouting at you, and one-way required, not after the first few hours.

Overandunderit · 05/10/2022 17:42

He'll not be able to stay with his gf in halls indefinitely. He'll come around but make sure you don't sweep things under the rug because it got dramatic. Make sure he understands your house your rules and respect is earned both ways

He'll be telling people a half story about how you "kicked him out".

MatildaTheCat · 05/10/2022 17:42

It’s a huff. Better he has it somewhere he can’t shout at you. Let us know when he’s back!

7Worfs · 05/10/2022 17:40

I play games and yes, it’s not nice to lose a game because of knocked rooter, but I’d never accept nerd rage in my house.
Stick to your guns.

DillyDilly · 05/10/2022 17:35

No, you weren’t unreasonable and your DS will be home in a day or two as he can’t stay in his girlfriend’s college room long term.