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Original poster

I am stunned at this wedding list

137 replies

Bananaknickers · 01/03/2007 09:54

Family member is getting married for the second time. She pinched her husband to be from his first wife( she was married too).He has his own business and she works full time. Now they have sent us a list from John Lewis if we want to buy something from there although they say we have lots already. Here's the good bit, they would like cash donations as they are building an extention on the side of their house

OP posts:
Sparkletastic · 01/03/2007 10:18

I know Cappuccino - although happily married it is only with the benfit of hindsight that I realise I should have asked for a goosedown duvet .

Blu · 01/03/2007 10:18

Utterly greedy.

But then I think serious wedding lists for anyone other than those who are young and / or leaving home and setting up house for the first time together is greedy these days. Most people marrying already have a home and all it's trappings. Little celebratory gifts are fine and lovely, it might be nice for v close family members to contribute to a big item - dinner set, for e.g, but otherwise, why buy financially independent adults domestic goods?

FoghornLeghorn · 01/03/2007 10:18

Is this the general concensous re; money for a wedding ?

BIL is asking for money as they want it for a deposit for a house - god knows how much they are expexcting to get and if I know them half as well as I think I do, it will get blown on shite long before a house is ever on the cards.

Greeves · 01/03/2007 10:18

Yes, yes, but what on earth are 'grannycrackers'? Are they a form of fetish underwear?

morningpaper · 01/03/2007 10:17

Grannycrackers Didn't you feel a tad RUDE accepting expensive presents AGAIN from your friends?

TeeCee · 01/03/2007 10:17

I've been with D 10 years and we might get married next year.
Can I not ask for loads of lovely things from Heals then no????
That was one of my main reasons to agreeing to have to go through withthe whole weddign day thing!

Carmenere · 01/03/2007 10:17

Money for the extension is just taking the piss really.

grannycrackers · 01/03/2007 10:16

i don't see why people getting married for the second time shouldn't have presents. i've been married twice - the first time when very young and dh1 was a good man but we drifted apart. a few years ago i got married again. it was his first wedding and his family couldn't care less that i'd been married before. we had a list and were very surprised - we got everything we asked for !

i find some of these posts quite offensive. a second marriage is not any less of a celebration than a first and sadly many middle aged and older people are still not rich

morningpaper · 01/03/2007 10:16

NOT - I missed that out

Greeves · 01/03/2007 10:16

PMSL at teabags for the builders, I would be very tempted to do that

morningpaper · 01/03/2007 10:15

I think second weddings you should ask or expect presents

You should REALLY discourage it

People are really thinking "Well where's the fecking Portmeiron soup tureen I bought you in 1997?"

Cappuccino · 01/03/2007 10:15

I wish I could get married again

I could do with a new duvet

Original poster
Bananaknickers · 01/03/2007 10:14

I think it is the asking for cash for their extention that shocked me really.

OP posts:
Carmenere · 01/03/2007 10:13

Oh there is that I suppose, I mean I would like nice things but I just don't expect to get them from getting married. It will be a bonus if I do get any nice gifts. And if I do get married ..........................

Cappuccino · 01/03/2007 10:10

I've got some friends who are getting married after squillions of years together and they are thinking well, we've had these £5 pans for ages, and we have these fraying bedsheets that we bought in the early 1990s...

just cos you're not 25 doesn't mean you can't have nice stuff

Carmenere · 01/03/2007 10:08

PhewOh no I won't have a list, we don't need lots of stuff from John Lewis. In fact I think it would be nice to get married abroad(Europe) and folks could pay for their flights instead of presents. Quite honestly why should friends pay for middleaged friends to have posh crockery. Much better to spend the dosh on having a fab party in the sun imo.

DimpledThighs · 01/03/2007 10:07

greedy and I agree with the vulgar. Get her a card and put a link to this thread in it.

Cappuccino · 01/03/2007 10:06

I think wedding lists are generally a good thing unless you want people to buy you a load of stuff you don't want

but a nice wedding list with a range of differently priced gifts on it is different to asking people to buy you a house

I can't see why people are so against wedding lists. A lot of people want to buy a gift for the newlyweds. Why can't they have the pleasure of knowing it's something they want and they aren't going to throw it in the bin?

pageturner · 01/03/2007 10:06

It's not the receiving of presents that's vulgar, it's the asking for them!

Original poster
Bananaknickers · 01/03/2007 10:05

I love the wrap up a brick idea

OP posts:
Original poster
Bananaknickers · 01/03/2007 10:04

Carmenere of course not

OP posts:
crispyduck · 01/03/2007 10:04

I am not against wedding lists....I got married second time round and did not have a list...we got money, vouchers and some lovely gifts...I would not dictate though what I expext people to spend money on...I find that attitude vulgar

tissy · 01/03/2007 10:04

carmenere, just don't have a list

MrsJohnCusack · 01/03/2007 10:03

buy them some tea bags for the builders

greedy baggages

Cappuccino · 01/03/2007 10:02

carmenere absolutely not - as long as you get complete mn approval on all the items on it

no lead crystal

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