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Original poster

Made Up Food Rules

185 replies

LittleMissEnraged · 11/11/2026 23:28

I don’t mean religious rules or cultural norms. I’m thinking about quirky individual rules you abide by that other people might not understand.
I am not a vegetarian, but I can’t bear meat on a pizza. Any vegetable - even pineapple!
My other strict rule is that you may have a condiment or butter on a sandwich but never both.

OP posts:
Allseeingallknowing · 12/11/2026 19:50

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 12/11/2026 19:37

Cream first then jam and absolutely never ever any butter

Show quote history

No, butter jam then cream. There is no other way!

OneZanyMintQuoter · 12/11/2026 19:49

SockQueen · 12/11/2026 15:38

Ice cream with hot puddings is wrong and not to be tolerated.

Agreed

ToadRage · 12/11/2026 19:46

gonoodleoodle · 12/11/2026 19:02

Baked bean juice may never ever touch eggs or bread.

ShockHow do you have beans on toast?

Lomonald · 12/11/2026 19:43

I also only like vegetables on Pizza, our chip shop is run by Italians and their vegi pizzas are delicious.

I put vinegar in my peas regardless what I eat them with.

BoaAlba · 12/11/2026 19:39

I always eat a pizza in a restaurant from the inside to the crust. I don’t eat any of the crust until all the part with toppings is finished. I then munch the crust until I’m full or it’s all gone.
I was ‘taught’ this by a pal when I was maybe 14 or 15. The idea is that you definitely finish all the best bits while it’s hot and before getting full. I follow this religiously

KindlySurfiingPlatypus · 12/11/2026 19:37

My weird rule is that although it's fine to have the same breakfast or same lunch two or more days in a row I hate having the same evening meal 2 days in a row.

If a meal is served with separate portions of meat/carb other veg on the plate it's unreasonable to eat all of one thing faster than the rest. The only reasonable thing is to work through all at the same approximate rate.

Yabu about sandwiches. Butter and mayo are great in combination.

allthegoodusernameshavegone · 12/11/2026 19:37

likelysuspect · 12/11/2026 19:19

And then I'll move on to scones.... cream or jam first....

Cream first then jam and absolutely never ever any butter

WBAveeno · 12/11/2026 19:32

Ketchup with eggs is wrong.

ham sandwiches have to have mustard and butter and proper ham.

salad with roast chicken is ok….just not with a roast dinner…

CurlyhairedAssassin · 12/11/2026 19:30

LaurieFairyCake · 12/11/2026 18:55

If you’re having a crisp sandwich it must have thick butter

If you're having a sandwich with crisps it must be called a "chip buttie". Same with chips - it's a 'chip buttie" not a chip sandwich.

ErrolTheDragon · 12/11/2026 19:25

Allseeingallknowing · 12/11/2026 15:43

Homemade gravy is superior to that made with granules! Bet that most wouldn’t know the difference!

anyone with tastebuds can tell the difference, can’t they? Granule ‘gravy’ is only passable if you want something gravy-ish with a meal that doesn’t allow for making real gravy.

sprigatito · 12/11/2026 19:24

I think people who don’t put butter in sandwiches are missing a bit of their soul (unless they’re allergic to dairy, I will grudgingly concede).

Asparagus tastes and smells like wee, so it isn’t allowed in my house.

Mince pies must have an open top with a pastry heart, star or Christmas tree. Fully enclosed pies are terminally out of balance.

Sliced cheese in a sandwich is a completely different foodstuff from grated. It’s gross.

A cooked sausage is partially blackened and crispy on the ends. If there’s pink on it, it’s raw.

CrowsInMyGarden · 12/11/2026 19:21

@SirzyI agree with the crisps with a sandwich, unless it is a sausage sandwich then I don’t have crisps

GameOfJones · 12/11/2026 19:20

Toast can be spread with either butter or jam but never butter and jam.

This rule goes out of the window for marmalade as both butter and marmalade on toast is acceptable.

likelysuspect · 12/11/2026 19:19

And then I'll move on to scones.... cream or jam first....

likelysuspect · 12/11/2026 19:19

LittleMissEnraged · 11/11/2026 23:28

I don’t mean religious rules or cultural norms. I’m thinking about quirky individual rules you abide by that other people might not understand.
I am not a vegetarian, but I can’t bear meat on a pizza. Any vegetable - even pineapple!
My other strict rule is that you may have a condiment or butter on a sandwich but never both.

All rules are made up by the way....

Yes people are incredibly rigid about food. If Im bored for example, I might start a thread about lasagne or bolognese and watch the bun fight kick off if I mention an ingredient in it that throws down the gauntlet of 'NOT TRADITIONAL'.

Perhaps I'll mention cheddar instead of the bechemel. Perhaps I'll throw capers in my bolognese sauce. Perhaps I'll say Im serving bread and rice with it as well.

People will go wild.

I'll tick off me little bingo card of

  • ragu
  • they dont eat it like that Italy
  • you mustnt double carb
  • you've done the layers all wrong
  • it needs 70 hours cooking down
  • my Italian nonna would say ....
  • its not served with spaghetti anyway
  • random insert of 'theres no such thing as English food' (this gets me bonus points by the way)
TimeToGoSaidZebadee · 12/11/2026 19:15

Fruit with meat dishes is so wrong.
I spend a ridiculous amount of time removing the little umbilical cord thing from eggs before I can cook them.
Toast rules - with jam, the toast should be left to go cold before spreading with jam.
with marmite, the toast should be hot.
I have many more weird food quirks. My dh has the patience of a saint because he does most of the cooking.

ilovepixie · 12/11/2026 19:14

Cannot eat egg and chicken together. It’s like eating a mother and its baby.

wishingonastar101 · 12/11/2026 19:12

Mayonnaise must never be warm.

SatanicMechanic · 12/11/2026 19:10

JLMA · 12/11/2026 19:07

you can only double carb on a Friday.

so no pasta and garlic bread together. Only on a Friday

You’ve reminded me of when we had French guests to stay and we went out for a pub meal. They were horrified that the lasagne came with garlic bread and chips! Three lots of carbs 😱😂

JLMA · 12/11/2026 19:07

you can only double carb on a Friday.

so no pasta and garlic bread together. Only on a Friday

emuloc · 12/11/2026 19:04

SockQueen · 12/11/2026 15:38

Ice cream with hot puddings is wrong and not to be tolerated.

Hear Hear!

gonoodleoodle · 12/11/2026 19:02

Baked bean juice may never ever touch eggs or bread.

Sirzy · 12/11/2026 19:00

I can’t est a sandwich without crisps! Not on the sandwich itself but alongside it. I think it stems back to school packed lunches!

Liverpoolxxx · 12/11/2026 18:58

No butter or margarine in meat sandwiches but mayo is acceptable. Cheese and egg both need butter.

LaurieFairyCake · 12/11/2026 18:55

If you’re having a crisp sandwich it must have thick butter

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