Secret Militant Feminist Agenda

[ElephantsAndMiasmas]

...what is it then? I keep reading about it as a reason for us all Lying Our Terrible Lies about being harrassed in the street, or beaten up at home or what have you.

It's making me feel a bit left out TBH.

Can someone drop me a hint about why we're talking about these things, given that they cannot be true in the egalitarian paradise in which we live?

Code is permitted.

Start the campaign immediately!

Slight niche one this but can we do a similar campaign for all waitresses who have to carry pitchers of water to tables and are subjected to the 'nice jugs' witticism?

Perhaps Kungfu Popsock kick in the balls would be appropriate?

Oh beachcomber, that old witticism never gets tiring (just imagine how much worse it'll be when Hooters is open everywhere).

Sisters, just to let you know, I'm just off the phone with the newly elected Top of All Hierarchies in the World Sister. From tomorrow she's introducing a universal law where all lad mags must be sold in carrier bags with "this man has purchased woman objectifying wank fodder" printed on them.

In an initiative similar to the 'smoking kills' labels on cigartte packets, this is a gradual lead up to a complete ban.

We've had a bit of argument from the wankers public and porn merchants publishers but we just kicked them in the balls so now they can't speak and express their objections.

Any questions?

She's got my vote of confidence :)

Catch you later sisters. Just off out on a school run secret mission.

Ok, who can rig up a pocket trebuchet that fires giant champagne corks into the gobs of ignorant tossers who make comments about throwing like a girl etc?

This thread makes me gleeful. Dark, patriarchy-smashing-glee!

Let's chuck a few of these in with every order as well.

Dittany - we've given you a celestial being a certain job, you happy with it?

Thank you, thank you ladies, indeed I am not worthy .

After a very sad and stressful week, have been reading out choice nuggets from this thread to DS 14 and we are crying with laughter.

Showed him Elephant's link to the SMF HQ.

DS: "Looks like somewhere the Legion of Doom would hang out!"

Thass ma boy!

Errm, I mean DS (14) of course. DS 14 would be a tad Surrendered non? We are not the Duggars.

DS is suitably grateful. I have him well trained.

I would like my DS to also be spared, oh my sisters. He DOES stare at boobs with his mouth open, but in his defence he's 9 weeks old and always hungry, so I think I can train him out of it in time, no? Failing that, the trebuchet thingy might work if it's still a problem when he's a teenager .
MrsFlittersnoop is now my inspiration :)

Oh yes. Baby carriers are a feminist issue. Prolly.
I think I'd look a lot like a Valkyrie heading into battle actually. A Valkyrie with a baby in an ergo. A baby probably posseting a bit.
Yargh! Puke on the perpetrators of injustice!

Squirt breastmilk into their eyes! Train the babies to puke on them! Get the toddlers to smear poo on them!

An army of lactating Valkyries. Sounds like the Daily Mail's worst nightmare come true.

Deffo a Good Thing.

Well we'll certainly be letting all the women and kids out of Yarl's Wood on the way, so yes indeedy MrsF. And we'll get Harriet Harman to hold a dagger banner. and Julie Burchill.

God those DMers are going to be illegally immigrating anywhere but here!

Sign me up.

Have just unearthed the pair of blue and white stripey OshKosh dungarees I wore at a Greenham Common demo back in '83 (don't tell that bunch over on Style & Beauty - I'll be lynched.)

Sadly unable to wear them while manning the barricades this time round. They are designed for teeny weeny hips which I no longer possess..

With hindsight, they were not the most practical attire considering the lack of sanitary facilities at Green Gate. Having to strip off in order to pee behind a bush whilst surrounded by 30,000 wimmin + entire army base of imperialist lackeys gawping teenage soldiers did dampen the feminist ardour somewhat.

[gawps in awe at MrsF]

My DH's dad did a lot of the practical childrearing during those years, cos his mum was at Greenham Common. This explains why he's my DH. Cos he gets it. And you were there too! Back when women called themselves feminists without qualifying the statement!

[more awe]

Maybe MrsF is your MIL? Eh?

Get you in your dungarees :o

I saw a whole rack of 'em in Brighton recently, people were looking at me strangely as I stood there gazing in awe.

I was working as a volunteer in a Women's Aid refuge at the time - we hired a coach so all the women and kids could attend the demo.

Do I win the Right-On Feminist Credentials prize then?

Ponders what said prize might be. Suggestions everyone?