The best thing your body has produced *warning-grim content not suitable for weak-stomached persons*

[NoEffingWay]

Once, when I was about 20 my toenail started to hurt, I looked at it and it didn't seem different, but I noticed that the toenail was a teensy bit in the skin. I got the nail scissors out and cut the nail. It was like peeling open a can of ready-roll pastries-there was a small pause and then a pop as a small river of brown pus rolled out over my toe. I spent a happy half hour or so cleaning under the nail, and then over the course of about 6 months it grew out. I was almost sad when I said goodbye to the last thickened nasty toenail.
It has never happened again despite my best efforts to the contrary

I was washing my feet and I felt a lump behind my toe, about the size of a pea. I stuck a needle in it and squeezed and this thick, clear, gel-like substance came out. It didn't hurt, didn't smell. DH had one on his thumb once, that one was great and filled up for few months before it finally stopped.

A family member had conjunctivitis and kept complaining of having a feeling of something in their eye, it was equally painful/ annoying. They pleaded with me to 'have a look' so being the kind caring Sporner I am, happily obliged! As I bathed their eye I spotted a yellow ball of pus in a corner of their eye. As I wiped it with a tissue, it became attached to the tissue....I kid you not! What came out of the eye was approx 3 inches long and the consistency of an elastic band! Then wiped again and another long string of yellow pus/ elastic band came out. They said the relief was indescribable. Although they aren't a sporner ,and once they saw the contents of the tissue 🤮🤮

This is glorious! Wish there was footage of it 😂The relief must have been lovely!

Oh my god - what the hell was it @Wonkyspecs ?? And what would cause that (so I can avoid it)? 😬

Just revisiting this post because... it came back! And an hour ago, after similar worrying at it for a couple of weeks, it started to produce a thin white thread of cheesy stuff which must have been a plug because it exploded in my hand again with pasty death-smelling badness.

Luckily it was a working from home day because I had to change my shirt, but the relief is amazing.

Reviving this after having an enjoyable reread and remembering one that happened to me. I’ve had three surgeries on my eye.

First one-massive swelling. An old guy at the garden centre took one look at me and shuddered.

Second one- eye became infected. My entire eye, other than the pupil bulged outward.

Third one-stitches didn’t dissolve. I could see little flashes of blue thread inside the scar. Tried to fish them out myself using the mirror but got confused by the mirror image. Husband is a wimp and wouldn’t even try. So off I went to the dr. The nurse had a field day. Said she saw on the self referral and bagsied my appointment.

Next ones not me but husband.

He developed a massive boil in his groin. Wouldn’t let me near it. Saw dr and was given antibiotics. It popped one Friday night before we were due to go for a weekend away. He went a hid in the bathroom to clean it all up. I’ve still not forgiven him. He does however get regular ingrown hairs on his thighs, chest and neck. The thigh ones usually come with a lovely spot which provide lots of entertainment. I once removed a 3 inch long hair from his collarbone which had grown side ways under the skin.

@outingmemyselfandiThe eye infection sounds both glorious and horrific in equal measure 😬🎉

It was pretty gruesome. I got asked my many people how the other guy looked 😂 and an escort to eye casualty it looked that bad!
Sadly location meant no pus and antibiotics soon cleared it up.

I love this thread.

I had a cyst on my breast. Of course got the doctor to check it out. Confirmed cyst and advised it’ll go away but it persisted for around a year. Sometimes I’d shoot fluid straight at my face if I squeezed, other times, tiny little bits of tissue would work it’s way out of the hole on the top. All of a sudden it started to grow.

It was like James and the Giant Peach. It grew and grew and grew. When it got to a large marble size, I thought “yep, time to get to the doctors and get this fucker gone”.

But I never needed to, for that night, in the bath, I plunged my boob in the warm water and massaged it. I noticed some purple fluid was coming out. As soon as I pulled it out of the water, I heard a click and something shot past my face. What followed was a volcano of yellow fluid and blood. It shot 2 feet up the wall!

I did my best to point it downwards but it was everywhere. Finally it stopped and drained the bath, wiped the walls and showered immediately.

I’m left with a tiny sac just under the skin and you can see where 2 holes were. It has never returned.

That day was the best day of my life.

I love this thread! Wish I had something interesting to share.