To find my son disgusting

[thegreenlight]

I was put on sertraline after losing my dad two years ago - I have just come off them as they made me like a zombie, feeling nothing, and put 4 stone on me. I have stopped taking them but now I find my son (who has adhd and high functioning autism) absolutely disgusting. He’s 11 and screams and tantrums if asked to take a shower, leaves food waste all over his room, he was in the hot tub with his brother and kept spitting water even though I asked him repeatedly to stop (and WHILE I was telling him to stop) he leaves his clothes everywhere, refuses to lift the toilet seat and pisses all over it despite me asking constantly for him not to do it. When I was on sertraline I could cope with it but now it makes me rage. I’ve just told him to get out of the tub (he won’t so I end up shouting at him) his attitude stinks and I don’t like him very much at the moment. I’m NOT going back on sertraline (even though my family would probably love me to as I’m a compliant fem-bot with no preferences or demands when on it). AIBU?

Yes that’s what I think . It’s a different can of worms. And I think OP feels it was to do with him being ND.

She’s got enough to deal with without worrying if she is grappling with the male entitlement issue perfectly as well.

I don’t think they all are actually; but some are.

I'll post what I want where I want because that is what public forums are for, thanks

@trekking1
Please don't hijack the thread of a woman who needs support just to spout off on some man hating tangent

My mother hated me a times and me her, but we truly love each other to bits. Get real!! @ jlou08
It's all part of being human. We are not
machines

Facts cannot me hating, they are just facts

What you are saying does read very angry - it’s an over reaction. If I do have to tell my son off, it’s in a very calm way - im sure this is how you usually handle things. However, I was just trying to point out that perhaps the over reaction is because of side effects of coming off your tablets to rapidly as it needs to be done slowly and with medical guidance- maybe you should look into this. I’m sure you don’t find your son disgusting, it’s a mean word to use about your child.

I think it’s time mumsnet HQ started thinking about what they wanted to achieve when they started this website
I appreciate notoriety and profit is nice
This is a website to support mums, step up HQ and do what you set out to do

Do you get pleasure from being cruel?

Can't you leave this woman alone. Have you bothered to read all the thread or just read a snippet and jumped straight in feet first?

Recent posters have clearly not read the whole thread. The OP is clearly a very caring mother who the majority of us here clearly support. Time for HQ to step in as @Gggnnn suggests.

I came off sertraline cold turkey, I just wanted it out of my system. I worked in MH at the time and had been on a number of different AD's over the years also.

People are treating the OP like she cant make a decision for herself.

I know right! What is she supposed to do just keep gaining more weight and feeling like shit?

Each to their own. It didn’t sound like OP was having a neutral (at least) time of it so reconsidering was a worthwhile suggestion.

@LuckySantangelo35 tapering wouldn’t mean “just keep gaining more weight and feeling like shit”, it’s just the neuropsychological difference between a 10ft drop and going down stairs gradually. It’s entirely the OP’s choice, if she doesn’t want to be on medication.

I'm sorry but that was not helpful of the consultant! Not everyone can afford to replace sheets constantly - I'm still using bed linen my son chewed holes into 5 years ago. He chewed holes in school polo shirt collars, t-shirts, cuffs of jumpers, it all costs money to replace, on top of having to constantly replace his jogging bottoms because he put holes in them by falling (possibly dyspraxic), and shoes (when he still wore them) as he had to have the laces done up so tightly it would destroy the shoes.

There's always something worse that could be happening, and future self-harm is something I seriously worry about for DS, doesn't mean there aren't other things that drive me up the wall sometimes, or that just make things harder financially.

@LuckySantangelo35 I didn’t write any such thing!!

My thoughts also. You sound like you've lost your rag and are rightly annoyed.

Can I suggest you may have undiagnosed autism/adhd yourself causing sensory overload and you have been wrongly medicated with setraline? (I apologise if this isn’t the case) you are just getting used to your emotions again it can be overwhelming but you have got this, and your little lad needs you, children are terrors and they test your patience I’m sure we all know! We’ve all been there don’t be ashamed you spoke out , you did not lie you admitted you feel this way of course you love him just your mind is in a bad place can you maybe explain your not in a good head space at the minute and your sorry if you snappy towards him, speak to him more he could be feeling these vibes causing him to play up more as he doesn’t understand why all of a sudden his mum can’t stand him. Kids younger days are precious and don’t last very long at all, I hope things get better for you all ❤️

Thankyou all for the support (and judgment!) I was wrong to go cold turkey off sertraline. I made an appointment with GP. I waited all day for the call and missed it by 2 minutes but by then had hit crisis, crying and screaming. I am now back on sertraline, it had a calming effect within an hour and I am now back on an even keel. Everything seems much easier to cope with.

Wishing you all the best op. Sorry for being harsh but mental health issues terrify me. Massively respect that you did still reach out to the Gp and your honesty.