Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Sleep

Join our Sleep forum for tips on creating a sleep routine for your baby or toddler. Need more advice on your childs development? Sign up to our Ages and Stages newsletter here.

Original poster

SPLIT NIGHTS! Anyone solved this pure hell?

170 replies

cookiesandcream24 · 17/08/2021 08:43

13 months old. Been going on for months on and off.

Up for 3 hours (almost to the minute every time) until she's ready to go back to sleep again. Usually after midnight.

I have been putting up with this for months and feel like I have tried everything possible nothing is working to change it.

Has anyone experienced this and found ANYTHING that works to stop this huge awake window in the night Confused

OP posts:
Marmitemarinaded · 17/08/2021 08:45

Are you prepared to cry it out?

Original poster
cookiesandcream24 · 17/08/2021 09:24

I've done sleep training with her. Which then enabled her to self settle and she puts herself to sleep at night now and for naps. This is not something for sleep training, she is simply awake. I've tried it many a times with this awake window and it simply goes on for that exact three hours and then she goes to sleep. Not fair to do that every time as that obviously isn't the cause

OP posts:
Marmitemarinaded · 17/08/2021 09:39

Cut down dah naps

BunsNPosies · 17/08/2021 10:03

Have you tried scheduled awakening? If she's awake around the same time each night, you gently rouse (not fully awake just disturbed) 30 mins before they normally wake up and it works by resetting their sleep. I've used this with my DD and seems to have helped.

Original poster
cookiesandcream24 · 17/08/2021 10:11

@BunsNPosies so what do I do exactly? Stir her and let her go back off so I need to wake her more than that?

Willing to try anything right now

OP posts:
Vicky1989x · 17/08/2021 10:18

How much is she sleeping during the day?

BunsNPosies · 17/08/2021 10:54

Just enough so that she stirs and then resettles. I used to lift mine slightly for a hug and kiss and gently lay her back down. If she seems to wake too easily, you can move the time back by 15 mins. It took around a week, but did seem to reset things.
My DD was awake for 2.5 hrs every night no matter what I did, but I knew I had to do something more drastic when our next dd was born as I was sooo shattered by the combined wake ups.

Hope this helps for you xx

BunsNPosies · 17/08/2021 10:58

This link might explain it much better than I did....

www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-1988-03-01-vw-350-story.html

nc8765 · 17/08/2021 11:06

Run us through a typical day. How much exercise and stimulation is she getting? How many naps does she have and how long are these naps?

Original poster
cookiesandcream24 · 18/08/2021 17:25

So she usually has 1.5 hours in the morning then 1 hour in the afternoon.

I wouldn't say that's excessive for her age. Or what do you all think? She's 13 months. I have to wake her every time, sure she'd sleep the day away if she could!

She gets plenty of stimulation. This week we've done parks, swimming, beach, plus lots of playing with her brother

OP posts:
FATEdestiny · 18/08/2021 18:32

What are the timings of her sleep schedule over 24h?

Original poster
cookiesandcream24 · 19/08/2021 17:02

Our day roughly goes like this

Wake 6.30

Nap 1 9.30-11

Nap 2 2.30-3.30

Bedtime 7.30

OP posts:
november90 · 21/08/2021 02:03

My son is doing the same although I think it's sleep regression related. Every time he has a regression he goes through phases of getting up for 3 hours during the night, but this current phase is just terrible. He is only on one nap a day now and I am not getting rid of that now 😰 I would trial one nap with yours or reducing the second nap duration because if she's waking up and being awake she is probably getting too much sleep during the day! I so hope it improves for you xx

Susannahmoody · 21/08/2021 02:10

You need a condensed nap. After lunch time, not more than 2 hours. Push the morning one forward slowly.

No way does she need 2 separate naps.

Foldinthecheese · 21/08/2021 02:20

Just here for support. My daughter did this at the same age. It was awful and I was a wreck. She was down to one nap and got loads of stimulation, but it didn’t seem to make a difference. Things got better as she got older, but then she would massively regress and we’d go through the same thing again. She is 2.5 now and it only properly improved when we moved in April and she got a new bed. For various reasons, she is in a king-size bed now and the change was almost instantaneous. I know how awful it is, though, so you have my sympathies.

Woliverine · 21/08/2021 02:52

You have my sympathy. We had the same, it went on for ages. Not distressed, just wide awake & happy wanting to play for 2-3 hours every night. I just accepted it was going to happen in the end. Got myself a cuppa, we had some quiet play, listened to audiobooks etc and we rode it out. Lasted a few months but it eventually stopped. Sorry I don't have any better answers for you!

mayblossominapril · 21/08/2021 02:56

My eldest went through a long phase of being awake for a few hours in the night. It ended as suddenly as it started and nothing I did helped in anyway so I just accepted it. I used the hours to catch up on email etc

tiredmama2020 · 21/08/2021 05:55

@cookiesandcream24 It seems like she has a lot of daytime sleep for her age! My DS is 9.5m and does about 2.5hours over 2 naps on a good day. I absolutely cap it at a combined 3hours though or else we have a horrendous nighttime sleep and he’s up in the night thinking it’s time to play!

Newmum29 · 21/08/2021 06:18

My 4 month only does 3 hours a day in naps. I’d cut at least the morning to an hour.

bookish83 · 21/08/2021 06:33

Now I don't think that is a lot of day time sleep- mine was doing the same until nearly 18 months, and needed the two naps! But it did not impact on nights like you are seeing.

Try one 2 hour nap and persevere for a few weeks with it and hopefully you will see a difference.

Good luck x

Vaselike · 21/08/2021 06:36

My eldest did this, from eighteen months. Good at falling asleep at 7, but awake 2-3 hours from about 1am.

Cutting naps kade no difference. Changed to a bed. We got very good at sleeping on his floor. Eventually it passed…

user159 · 21/08/2021 06:38

My DD dropped the morning nap around this age. Sometimes have 15mins in the car if we were out before 10am but we moved to an early lunch 11.30 then straight to bed for 2 hours max. Bed time bought forward to 6.30/7.

Hope it improves soon

lannistunut · 21/08/2021 06:38

Are they in your room? Mine slept better with me near as they didn't fully wake up so often.

Sleep training is basically teaching a child no one will respond, I don't think that is worth it personally.

We did have phases of awake in the night, I just pretended we were Tudors, apparently they got up and had meals etc.

FTEngineerM · 21/08/2021 06:55

Our 14m old has one nap a day and has since 13m, before or after lunch depending on whether he’s at nursery. It’s between 45 minutes and an hour and a half.

FTEngineerM · 21/08/2021 06:56

Also should say sleeps a solid 12 hours at night *