Page 24 | DatingThread 55 - Spring has Sprung!

Nosdacariad · 2026-02-24T07:23:37+00:00

The Rules: -The first rule about the dating thread is don't talk about it with people you're dating -Develop a thick skin -Do not invest emotionally too soon -It’s all BS until it actually happens -Trust your gut instinct -People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault -Know your worth -If it's not fun, stop -Loo update is mandatory -No dating the thread -Treat others as you'd like to be treated -Any relationship you have that could get ruined by having a conversation about your feelings, standards and/or expectations wasn't really stable enough to begin with -The things you choose to ignore/ tolerate now are the reasons you will break up in the future -OLD can get very time consuming. Keep doing other activities you enjoy Optional: Please give your irons (potential dates you are talking to) nicknames like Mr Scottish. Initials are allowed (Mr S) when you are an item*

rubberduck68 · 20/03/2026 15:48

OneShyQuail · 18/03/2026 17:32

The only reason I "jumped" on him is because rubberduck professed to feeling confused etc.....

Everyone has their own boundaries and Ts&cs, we can only offer advice on what we are presented with on here and we are of course prejudiced to our own preferences/thought patterns/experiences.

For me, if someone says, ill call you at 5pm, then either they call, or around that time if its not convenient to call they message to apologise etc. In my head, it takes 30 seconds to think of someone and type a message. If someone cannot be a) bothered to type a message or b) i dont cross their mind that they said theyd call so basically forgot me......im out 🤷‍♀️

Thats my boundary though. Mr sourdough wouldn't work for me. Hopefully he works for rubberduck as she sounds lovely 😍

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I didn't feel you jumped on him, and I was presenting myself as confused because I was at the time. He didn't say he would call at 5 pm, it was a loose arrangement of talking that eve if I was through with my mother's day plans. I am watching to see if this becomes a pattern though. Thank you for saying I sound lovely, as do you and everyone on here who has been so supportive. I'm grateful for all the help.

TheThingOnTheIce · 20/03/2026 15:50

rubberduck68 · 20/03/2026 15:48

I didn't feel you jumped on him, and I was presenting myself as confused because I was at the time. He didn't say he would call at 5 pm, it was a loose arrangement of talking that eve if I was through with my mother's day plans. I am watching to see if this becomes a pattern though. Thank you for saying I sound lovely, as do you and everyone on here who has been so supportive. I'm grateful for all the help.

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I might not have thought that was such a big deal … if it hadn’t have been for his previous week of silence

rubberduck68 · 20/03/2026 15:51

Polly1979 · 19/03/2026 08:10

Ok, so matched with a guy from overseas who answered one of my opening moves on bumble. Just a one word answer, no follow up question. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and replied and asked him a couple of questions. He answered one of them - two words - then ‘how are you this morning?’

I’m thinking of unmatching here and now, or asking ‘what about my other question?’ Am I just being a miserable cow?!

I have two school age kids and work full time so time is precious to me and I’m fed up with wasting it on these low-effort dickheads!

This is his A-game. The time to impress upon you how dateable he is. It would appear he has given you that information already... next!!

rubberduck68 · 20/03/2026 15:57

BoxOfCats · 19/03/2026 20:19

Update from me.

Mr Nomad was here last weekend. He waterblasted my house and patio, fixed a broken fence and did a bunch of other jobs. He’s not one for traditional romantic gestures so I think this is how he shows he cares! We still chat every day but my house is going on the market just after Easter so it’s unlikely I’ll be able to fly down to see him anytime soon. And he’s not back in my home town until early May. So not sure what will happen now given the distance.

I haven’t seen Mr Charismatic in 2 weeks, when I invited him to mine for dinner. He is still messaging me on What’s App every few days (standard for him). When we last met, he said he wanted to invite me over for dinner sometime, but no actual invitation has been forthcoming. I messaged him earlier this week saying if he had an evening free this week we should catch up, he gave me a a “heart” emoji and has messaged about other stuff since but no actual suggestion to meet up. To be fair, he also bought a house this week so perhaps it’s been difficult to plan ahead. It just seems oddly in contrast with how he is in person, which is very engaged, considerate, the perfect gentleman. I think I need to chat to him again to see where his head is on the dating front, he last said a month ago that he was just tentatively getting his head back into dating. I’m fine not to rush, but having a hard time working out how he is feeling about it all.

Mr Nomad is such a keeper, seriously that is a lot of work and no man would do that unless he really likes the woman he is doing it for. Mr Charismatic: well, a heart emoji is not a response to an invite to catch up with someone - it is an emoji, which at best is a place holder and worst just low effort. If you are having to wonder how a man feels about you, that is possibly your answer? Let's look at these two men. Man A (Mr Nomad) talks to you daily and shows up to help you. Man B (Mr Charismatic) is in minimal contact and making no plans or moves that improve your life in any way. May is not that far away... I'd put my money on Mr Nomad any day.

OneShyQuail · 20/03/2026 16:06

rubberduck68 · 20/03/2026 15:48

I didn't feel you jumped on him, and I was presenting myself as confused because I was at the time. He didn't say he would call at 5 pm, it was a loose arrangement of talking that eve if I was through with my mother's day plans. I am watching to see if this becomes a pattern though. Thank you for saying I sound lovely, as do you and everyone on here who has been so supportive. I'm grateful for all the help.

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It was more directed at another poster :)
Hope you have another date lined up! :)

Catza · 20/03/2026 17:39

To be fair, he also bought a house this week so perhaps it’s been difficult to plan ahead.

@BoxOfCats but not too difficult to text "Hey, I just bought a house this week and it's been difficult to plan ahead"... I think we should stop giving men the benefit of a doubt.

Mr. Nomad sounds like a keeper if you can make distance work.

Original poster

Nosdacariad · 20/03/2026 18:42

I think Mr Nomad says he doesn't want a relationship, though I'm often wrong so happy to be corrected.

OP posts:

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 20:19

hello! Single mum 43 (single for four years) trying to dip my toe back in and it’s a shit show out there! 😂 finally matched with someone I wanted to go on a date with and then poof didn’t respond to messages and looks like he’s deleted the app! Insanity that these men talk so much bullshit with no follow through!

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 20:20

Also @BoxOfCatsi have no idea of backstory but loving you have two men on the go! This is what I aspire to do

OneShyQuail · 20/03/2026 20:36

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 20:19

hello! Single mum 43 (single for four years) trying to dip my toe back in and it’s a shit show out there! 😂 finally matched with someone I wanted to go on a date with and then poof didn’t respond to messages and looks like he’s deleted the app! Insanity that these men talk so much bullshit with no follow through!

Welcome!
Thick skin needed. View everyone as strangers until at least date 4 💪

Catza · 20/03/2026 21:04

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 20:19

hello! Single mum 43 (single for four years) trying to dip my toe back in and it’s a shit show out there! 😂 finally matched with someone I wanted to go on a date with and then poof didn’t respond to messages and looks like he’s deleted the app! Insanity that these men talk so much bullshit with no follow through!

Totally normal. Thank your lucky stars that he didn't waste any more of your time and block his number.
As a rule, 99.9% of conversations go nowhere. I'd like to say it's all men but, sadly, I have dropped a few balls myself 😥

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 21:16

@Catza@OneShyQuail I really wonder why they do it! But just put my thick skinned coat on…!

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 21:17

Also, I did date around three years ago with varying degrees of success just forgot why a load of bullshitters there are how I don’t fancy anymore haha

BoxOfCats · 20/03/2026 21:19

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 20:20

Also @BoxOfCatsi have no idea of backstory but loving you have two men on the go! This is what I aspire to do

Ha! I made the mistake of telling my 70 year old mother and she most definitely disapproves 😂

BoxOfCats · 20/03/2026 21:20

Nosdacariad · 20/03/2026 18:42

I think Mr Nomad says he doesn't want a relationship, though I'm often wrong so happy to be corrected.

Yes, spot on. Although he told me last week that his mum knows about me, and thinks I am his girlfriend. Go figure…

Brightbluesomething · 20/03/2026 21:22

@pinkpalmleaves Most conversations go nowhere. I had a decent one going over about a week and he asked about the results of a qualification I had been studying for. I replied to say I’d passed and was really pleased then he immediately unmatched. Men are weird. Don’t take it personally.

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 21:22

So, what’s the secret to getting two men @BoxOfCatsdo you prefer one to the other?

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 21:24

@Brightbluesomethingyou probably triggered an emotion in him that he couldn’t handle (maybe that he actually liked you haha) I have been known in the past to do the same and it’s why I chat with someone that I’m not 100% on! But the difference between women and men we tend to keep the conversation fairly standard - men love bomb then just unmatch! Weird!!! But so nice to know it’s not just me!

BoxOfCats · 20/03/2026 21:25

rubberduck68 · 20/03/2026 15:57

Mr Nomad is such a keeper, seriously that is a lot of work and no man would do that unless he really likes the woman he is doing it for. Mr Charismatic: well, a heart emoji is not a response to an invite to catch up with someone - it is an emoji, which at best is a place holder and worst just low effort. If you are having to wonder how a man feels about you, that is possibly your answer? Let's look at these two men. Man A (Mr Nomad) talks to you daily and shows up to help you. Man B (Mr Charismatic) is in minimal contact and making no plans or moves that improve your life in any way. May is not that far away... I'd put my money on Mr Nomad any day.

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Interesting, that’s good food for thought.

Mr Nomad I have been seeing for 6 months now. And you are right. He is consistently emotionally available. Messages me to wish me luck when he knows I’ve got something big on at work. Checked in on me this morning to see how I’m feeling (as I’ve had a cold the last few days). His actions definitely have shown he cares. He still says he doesn’t want a relationship, but he also says he isn’t seeing anyone else. Maybe it’s time for me to ask him what he thinks a relationship actually is!

BoxOfCats · 20/03/2026 21:27

pinkpalmleaves · 20/03/2026 21:22

So, what’s the secret to getting two men @BoxOfCatsdo you prefer one to the other?

Asking if I prefer one to the other is like comparing and apple and a banana, or asking me which of my two cats is my favourite. They both have their merits.

And no real secret, in fact I would rather just be seeing one person. I just need someone who is actually willing to step up!

BoxOfCats · 20/03/2026 21:28

Nosdacariad · 20/03/2026 15:34

Nothing doing here, couple of promising conversations started then fizzled out 🙃

Argh, so disheartening! 😩

Original poster

Nosdacariad · 20/03/2026 21:28

@pinkpalmleaves welcome 🌴
@BoxOfCats maybe you should ask him, seems good news about him telling his mum 😁

OP posts:

Original poster

Nosdacariad · 20/03/2026 21:30

New Irons...Cyberman, Mr Eng, Mr PE.

OP posts:

BoxOfCats · 20/03/2026 21:30

Nosdacariad · 20/03/2026 15:34

Thanks for the update @BoxOfCats

How does the uncertainty sit with you?💜

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I really dislike uncertainty in relationships. I’m generally fine with things so long as I know where I stand.

I messaged Mr Charismatic at lunchtime on Friday asking if he was celebrating his house purchase this weekend. It’s been nearly 24 hours and no reply yet. It’s no unusual for him, and I think I’ve been willing to overlook it until now because when I see him he’s so engaged, present and great. But I’m increasingly wondering if this is ever going anywhere.

Betsy95 · 20/03/2026 21:44

BoxOfCats · 20/03/2026 21:25

Interesting, that’s good food for thought.

Mr Nomad I have been seeing for 6 months now. And you are right. He is consistently emotionally available. Messages me to wish me luck when he knows I’ve got something big on at work. Checked in on me this morning to see how I’m feeling (as I’ve had a cold the last few days). His actions definitely have shown he cares. He still says he doesn’t want a relationship, but he also says he isn’t seeing anyone else. Maybe it’s time for me to ask him what he thinks a relationship actually is!

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I take my hat off to you because I don’t know how I would feel about this.

You've been seeing him six months and he still says it’s not a relationship? You are very patient.