I'm getting the fanny gallops for a man 16 years older than me

[Fannygallopswtf]

What on earth is going on.

I met him at work not long after I started there a few months ago. We hit it off straight away. He's on a different team, but I find myself finding excuses to talk to him and involve him in projects.

BUT.

He's not physically attractive at all. I normally go for younger men. He's obviously much older than me. A bit overweight. A smoker. Basically the opposite of everything I would usually find attractive physically in a man.

But!!

I've just spent all evening texting him after we spent the full day travelling together for work today (a situation which was shamelessly engineered by the two of us so we could spend some time alone together) and I'm getting the serious fanny gallops over him??

Wtf is going on and am I right in thinking it would be a terrible idea to pursue this?

*The same with James Martin, the tv chef

So completely understand you here - a man can just be sexy without being pretty*

But James Martin is a quite classically good looking guy.
His series "Sweet Baby James" was a sort of pun related to his heart throb chef image/market (he was a favourite with house wives/women - relatively handsome, had a warm, charming persona at that time etc.) so I don't get how he's an example of sexy but not pretty/handsome/attractive.
He's the opposite.

Yes, his looks are now middle aged, but he partly became established as a TV chef because he was easy on the eye, and he's still so, to some extent.

Same 😂😂😂😂

Work colleague and the fact he's a smoker would put me off, much more the latter than the former.

I'm at risk of sounding like Donald J Trump, but your's is a truly beautiful love story @bettydavieseyes ❤️

@MrsWhites
"maybe he is actually a single, good guy with a fully functioning penis???"

That made me laugh - at the end of the day that's all the OP needs after all 😆

To be fair, she's not wrong 😂

Exactly, maybe I have lower standards than some on here but if you like someone and have chemistry I’d be inclined to give it a chance.

Doesn’t mean you have to marry the guy!

One of the happiest marriages I knew had a 16 year age gap and a previously divorced father of a larger family. He was a good dad to all of the kids and a brilliant partner.

I'm late to the party but what is 'javelin arse'? I'm scared to Google!

I love the tangents this thread has gone off on

Javelin arse is when you get a sudden intense shooting pain up your bumhole, it's bloody agony. Usually happens around ovulation/periods.

The smoking would put me right off no matter what was galloping.

For me it's values that count in long-term relationships, or do you just fancy some fun?

https://www.geni.com/people/Fanny-Gallop/6000000096326217981 🤨🧐🤯

⬆️ Wife of William Thomas Dicker Jennings 😧

Genealogical details for Lady J'Aveline Arse (1742-1836) currently eluding me 😏

She had a daughter called Fanny Dicker 🤣

Never, ever, ever get into any kind of a romantic/sexual situation with a colleague.

I don't know. I didn't want anything with anyone until I started developing a crush on this seemingly random guy!

I've been trying to analyse it further at work today. And the best I can come up with is there's just something about the way he says my name that does something to me

Sometimes chemistry can be explained, it’s just there.

Have you have anymore contact with him over the weekend?

I met the man i mentioned upthread at work. But i suppose i should have put the minimum wage shop job first like they did when they went bust and made us all redundant 🙄

He could be old and tick all the boxes, but a smoker? I couldn’t even go near him.

No contact over the weekend but we are working on a few things together so I've spoken to him quite a bit on Teams.

I also had a coffee with some friends this afternoon who both said go for it!

When I met DH he was very much not my type - only 22 (8 years younger), long hair, living in a flat-share , terrible taste in music and some pretty dodgy outfits. Yet here we are , thirty years and two dc later, very happy . Chemistry is the best !

😂😂😂

If I date a colleague in my team, or even have a one-night stand with him or her, I have to notify my line manager. Trust me when I say that a policy like that kills the "fanny gallops" stone-dead.

It doesn't always - I had a 5 year relationship with one of the guys in my team. Managers knew.

Were you required to tell your line manager, immediately? It's the requirement that kills it for me. Being able to keep a relationship under wraps for a while takes the pressure off because you can decide whether it's working before telling people.