To see this guy again or not, early red flags?

[yslxx]

I've been on 3 dates with a guy, I don't really go on dates but we were talking for a few weeks beforehand and he seemed ok so I thought why not. When we've been out he comes across as a real gentleman which is something I've never come across to be honest.

I've now been questioning our last date which was Saturday and I'm not sure if I'm just looking into things too much, we had a nice evening out just a drink and dinner. He offered to give me a lift home and I accepted, we had a kiss in his car outside and chatted for a bit, before I went inside he lightly tapped me across the face like a slap it wasn't at all hard but it was just random I thought. I looked at him as if to say wtf an he's just grinning. I don't know if I'm over thinking things or if this is him testing the waters with me and could potentially be abusive in the future.

That evening he also made a comment about make up, he touched my face with one of his fingers then looked at his finger as if to see some make up on there?? Which there wasn't any, he said he doesn't really like it I ask why and he said it's just not good for your skin I do wear make up but not a great deal and I don't have bad skin so now I'm wondering if this is a red flag as well.

I know he's going to ask to meet up again and to be honest I did like him but now I'm unsure like I said it wasn't hard at all and that could be his way of being funny or messing around. Any advice would be appreciated thank you

Trust your gut. Walk away.

Fuck me there sure are some wierdos on those websites.

Immediate no from me.

Yea it’s a red flag that he’s got the potential to be a controlling judgemental prick if he’s already telling you about wearing make up

Bye bye mate

Did you ask him about the 'slap'? At any rate, I would definitely ditch him, he's definitely showing controlling tendencies.

Jeez, walk away. Please.

RUN

What a nutter. Block him.

The ick has set in. If you’re doubting the relationship, bin him.

Run, don’t walk

Don't risk it, walk away.

He sounds controlling, judgemental and potentially physically abusive.

Yeah. If you have to think about it, the answer is usually no.

What a CF, he doesn't like your make-up? You're doing your make up so YOU feel good in your skin, not for him.

Don't run for the hills. Block and delete him. Trying to be polite with these types of people will wear you down. They don't deserve it.

Frightening. I agree with the others that you should run. Also: I have never dated anyone but “real gentlemen” and toyching your face like that or commenting on your skin is absolutely not the behavior of a kind/gentlemanly oerson. So the courtesy of the first dates wasn’t real. The last part was the real him. And it is scary.

It's not a matter of having the ick - you could get that from someone who was ok but just eg wore socks with sandals. He sounds really controlling and frankly quite scary. I wouldn't go anywhere near him again.

I think I just looked at him as if to say wtf? I might of even said wtf. And he was just grinning. I did think it was weird because who even really does that, even if it's a joke we don't know eachother that well. I feel like if I'd of said why did you just slap me he'd of been like, it wasn't a slap because in a way it wasn't if you know what I mean. Had me thinking if he was one of those that would do something but then claim it was a joke.

I can’t think of any reason you would even lightly « slap » someone on the face. Especially with no context to it.
ans just grinning not apologising…ummm no!!!
do not see this guy again!

Do you really have to ask if these are red flags? Surely you must see that neither of these things is OK. The face slap thing is fucking creepy as hell and the makeup comment is controlling and judgemental. Run a mile from this man.

Trust your instinct, it's there for a reason....

I would find both those actions creepy and repulsive, especially the one about make-up. And your instinct is spot on. He's overstepping boundaries - touching you without consent, and not in an affection way on either occasion, to see whether you allow your boundaries to be overstepped.

I'd step away fast.

I think I would take the slap as a warning that he is potentially testing the waters, as you say. I wouldn't bother going out with him again. What a weirdo!

Dear me, that’s weird and abusive (he raised his hand against you, even if it was not hard, and he feels that he can comment on what he likes or doesn’t like regarding your make-up, with the expectation that you will pay attention to this plus, how dare he touch your face to see how much make-up comes off on his finger?). Just no.

Trust your gut on this one - definitely sounds weird to me. The little non-slap slap and make up thing are just really strange and feel a bit controlling. I felt uncomfortable just reading what you wrote - if my friend telling me this I would say do not see this guy again, either ghost or straight up say sorry I’m not feeling this. Get rid before he gets weirder / possessive.

Please don't even think any more about this man.
He is NOT a gentleman.
You are being set up for 'pain training'. Always pushing the boundaries.
Ugh.

You obviously think this is odd behaviour or you wouldn’t have posted it on here. Listen to your gut instinct - it’s there for a reason and yes I do think it is a red flag. 🚩

He playfully ‘tapped’ your face (WTF??!!) and who the fuck does he think he is touching your face to see if you wear make up?! Run!!

Ditch and block all contact