To think even men in their 80’s are still sex obsessed !!!

[Prettydisgustedactually]

A year ago, a new neighbour moved in next door, he’s 87. When I found out his age, before he moved in, I mentioned to my kids that we must be caring and helpful etc and keep an eye on him.

However, he’s the opposite of what we expected. Drives literally anywhere in his sporty BMW, has an iPhone, on YouTube etc….a very young at heart type. He has an on/off relationship with a woman in her late 60’s but they row lots and she ups and leaves.

Over the summer he asked if he could help me with the garden to keep himself fit. I offered to pay but he wouldn’t accept so I made him lunch on the days he helped. One day my daughter wanted to go in the pool, but because he was there she wouldn’t. I told her not to be silly but she said she felt weird because he’d made some kind of innuendo about me. She couldn’t remember what exactly, as she was shocked he’d said it. I told her she was mistaken as he’s 87.

Then a few weeks later he said “I’d have a go at you if you weren’t married” I’m 56!!! I was so shocked, but pretended I hadn’t heard. The week after he’d changed his car, and when I asked how he was getting on with it he told me it was great and he’d ‘Have to get me on the back seat’ Enlightening me with “I’m a fully functioning man in all areas” and going on to ask me “What do you think of that program Naked attraction?” Urgh…..I wanted to vomit 🤮

This has absolutely disgusted me and made my skin crawl. It’s actually saddened me too, as I really thought he genuinely enjoyed having a chat to me, when actually…I mean WTAF????? Then even worse!! My DD (aged 18) said he’d been all flirty with her after she put his bin out FFS 😡😡😡 What the hell?

Its not OK. And it's very common.

We have all met old pervy men.

It's not unusual. I've had old men tell me they'd like to date a sexy young thing like me.

Your mistake was seeming to see old men as harmless old grandads and forgetting that they are still males! And that they also vary.

Some of them may be nice. Some of them may be perverts.

We are not judging you on here so don't beat yourself up. Just be a bit wiser in the world

Exactly so. It's not really about sex drive, though pests will claim it is. Plenty of people have a high sex drive but would not harass other people. Harassment is about power, not sex.

I work in a care home. I now know that sweet old men are not really a thing!

You most certainly did not ask for it and being kind is not stupid. This is his fault entirely. Women have got to stop blaming themselves for male behaviour.

It's not about his libido. He harasses women because he is an entitled male on a power trip. Why are you calling the OP ageist for assuming somebody 30 years her senior would not be hitting on her? It's not his age, it's the age difference that's relevant.

There are two totally different issues here as I see it.

1. He's making unwanted advances to you - of course if you don't like this, it is vile.

2. He has a sex drive - why is it disgusting for a person of 87 to have a sex drive? It's his dick and his life.

My mum had a bad fall and broke two arms. After going into hospital, she went into a care home for a rehabilitation stay.

Some of the residents were there permanently.

I went in to visit my mum. I was stressed and really tired. Her fall had been scary. I went into the tiny canteen and got a cup of tea.

An old male resident came over and plonked himself down. I couldn't even get a cup of tea.

The first thing he said to me was "if I was a bit younger I'd give you a good seeing to"

Not living under a rock thanks but I’ve had very little exposure to old men. Grew up with no grandad, no brothers and dad died aged 12

What??? He moved in next door! I didn’t invite him into my daughter’s life. I was kind and thoughtful to him, as were both my kids. I genuinely thought my daughter was mistaken when she believed he’d made a bit of an innuendo about me. Mainly because she couldn’t recall what it was, and I thought she’d misheard. Yes call me stupid, but I really did not think he would ever think such a thing. He wasn’t in her life, he was in the garden, never in the house, and yes, as soon as he made the remarks I avoided him and then told him my thoughts on his remarks. I expected an apology, but it was far worse because he went on to say he wouldn’t dream of breaking up my marriage, as though I actually fancied the wrinkly old goat!!!

Disgusting!! I’m actually glad I posted this because it’s really opened my eyes to what old men can be like! Literally had no idea and yes, call me stupid but I just didn’t !!

I don’t give a damn about his sex drive! I do however give a damn that he took advantage of my kindness and turned it into something vile, and thought it ok to be flirty with my daughter. Absolutely disgusting 🤢

Sorry it just came across that part of the issue was him being like that at his age. Totally agree it is absolutely revolting and wrong for him to come on to your DD and you.

Fair enough but I never knew my grandparents, my dad died when I was 17 and I am an only child but I've worked all my adult life, attended social events, been in pubs, hotels etc and generally lived a life in the wider world. I don't know why you would think that men magically become all sweet and lovely and cease to notice tits and arse just because they pass a certain age. You've got some sort of Disney stereotype in your head and it's a well known fact that most men think they deserve a younger model. That's been the case since time immemorial!

She sounds ageist because she assumed an 80 year old wouldn't be interested in sex! That's what I was referring too. But yer like I said he's a creep and harassing her which is obviously wrong. The age difference is fine though why do you think its a problem? OP is 50 not a child. It's his behaviour that's gross.

I've always said, i think men would still have sex on their death beds. They don't go through the menopause like women and nature doesn't make men stop breeding like females.

My friend was sexually assaulted by a 99 year old ! He was a patient on her ward. He asked if he could see her in the toilet as he had something private to discuss. She asked what was wrong and he grabbed her boobs. He said he had always wanted to do it !
I would avoid the dirty old divil like the plague

Of all men i know, the old men are by far the worst.

They seem to think they can say and do what they like, cuz their age excuses them. And everyone will just say oh they're harmless

You're the naive one here if you think Carry On films were the cause.
A perv is a perv. Every generation has them and they don't change just because they get old.
Would you assume a man who just watches modern shows couldn't possibly be a perv? Heard of Steven Bear? Andre Tate?

It's a shame that Carry On films get blamed for so much. Charles Hawtrey as a policeman on a child's scooter being chased by an alsatian is still one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

What an ageist and sex-hating post.

No I’m not ageist! I didn’t assume an 87 (NOT 80) year old would not be interested in sex. I assumed an 87 year old WOULD NOT BE HITTING ON A MARRIED WOMAN 37 years his junior just because she showed him some kindness. I also did not expect an 87 year old to flirt with my 19 year old daughter 😡😡😡😡 and no…the age gap is not fine thank you! Even if I wasn’t married,a 37 year age gap is not my thing. Happy for it to be yours though!!!

@Prettydisgustedactually Exactly, the age gap is disgusting. The entitlement of these pervs, and then they get offended.. when not wanting an older man is perfectly normal! He should be with other 80+ year olds

Is this a joke??? You call this ageist because I did not enjoy the uninvited sexual advances of an 87 year old man. I am supposed to be ok with that am I? Just because he’s old that makes it ok? I truly hope you don’t have children if you think an 87 year old flirting with a 19 year old is ok. What a truly disturbing comment! 🤮🥵🤮🥵

Most of the male elderly neighbours I know are absolute gents, but I grew up in the same area and they have always been so.
The pervs have always been pervs. I can remember one was starting to talk to me like I was a sex object at 11. What is strange is that everyone in the area just accepted it. Oh Ernie he’s awful isn’t he? He was until the day he died.
My parents had a good friend - I will call him Eric - had a lovely wife and kids I grew up with. He used to look at me a bit too long when I was about 11.
I never said anything, and as the years went by I didn’t see much of him. He came to the funerals of both of my parents. Then, aged 84, he asked me out.
I was 44. He said he’d always wanted to but didn’t want to upset my dad!
I have realised that a lot of men just carry on regardless and a lot are delusional about how attractive they are.
Very rarely have I met a woman who believes all
men are interested in her.
Keep this man away from your family, OP. Vile.

You don't think it's creepy the way men frequently go after much younger women?
It's a classic example of male entitlement that they so often think they should be able to get women decades younger than they are while shunning women their own age.