Found condoms - is it ever innocent?

[MissisK]

I found a box of unopened condoms in DH’s draw. We don’t use them and haven’t for literally years. Is there ever an innocent reason for him having them?

I don’t want to jump to conclusions but we’ve had a rocky marriage and lack of intimacy for years.

Why would he put them in his drawer when he knows I put the washing away and could quite likely find them. I will speak to him but need to get my head straight.

What's the expiry date on them?

Expiry is Aug 2027

I mean if you don’t use condoms then no, there is no innocent explanation really, sorry OP

Oh dear......
I'm naturally suspicious but what innocent reason could there be...?
Prepare for him to say he was hoping to use them with you.

No, but you know that. Sorry

There’s usually no innocent reason for this. I suppose the only exception would be if you have a teenage son and he’s planning to give them to him but doesn’t want to tell you in case you’ll disapprove. Best thing is to ask him, and unless he gives that as the answer then there is nothing innocent about it 💐

Not one I can think of. He’s bought them recently.

No.

Suspicious for sure, but also spectacularly stupid to not find a better hiding place if he is up to something, surely?

What they call a 'posh wank'? Is he at all likely to try to masturbate & not 'make a mess'?

other than that I'd say he is trying to upset you, so that he can say you are the one that wants a divorce. OR he's as thick as pig shit & why haven't you divorced him already??

whstever, you need to REALLY think hard about whether you still want to be married to him, it doesn't sound like a happy marriage. Throwing away the rest of your life because you've been with him x years or have children isn't the answer xx

Say nothing. Wait and see if any go missing.

Do you have teenage children? Could he have bought them for them and be about to talk to them about safe sex?

We do have a young teenage son. He has no interest in relationships as far as I can see. I can’t see DH having those conversations with him but I could be wrong. If that is the reason, I’m wondering why hide them and not tell me.

I think I’d take a photo of them in his drawer(so no denial later), then try to wait it out and see if he moves them or any go missing 😬

You are in a sexless relationship.

Your partner has recently bought condoms.

Your partner is in a sexual relationship elsewhere.

There is literally no other reason for them.

Time to get my head out of the sand. I was hoping this was innocent. Obviously I’ll speak to him to give him a chance to explain. But wanted to prepare myself for any excuses too. So sad.

What hurts more is that I’ve given him several chances to leave over the last few years since he’s totally disengaged and distanced himself from me. But he’s said there is no one else and he doesn’t wasn’t to leave.

Say nothing for now and see will more go missing .. You have a chance now to catch him so hold tough for a while ..

He will deny it. If I were you I would be doing some snooping first.

phone, bank accounts that sort of thing before I said anything.

if there is any evidence he will hide or delete it all. He will have an excuse for the condoms and you will be no further forward.

This. Take a picture too.

Posh wank is not a thing. Probably a myth made up by men when their wives found condoms.

Neither do men look after them for their friends or get them given as free samples at work.

If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck…

This. Sorry op.

But now there is someone else, or else he is paying for sex, so he can go.

I expect he didn’t want to lose half his property etc and have to do his own laundry.