Married to someone with Asperger's/ASD: support thread 8

[Daftasabroom]

New thread.

This thread is for partners seeking to understand the dynamics of mixed NT/ND partnerships. It is a support thread, and a safe space to have a bit of a rant. Avoid sweeping generalisations if possible, try and keep it specific to you and your partner. (ASD partners welcome to lurk or pop in, but please don't argue with other posters and tell them they are wrong)

Link to previous thread

ontetwo3. Thanks for the reply. The maturity thing resonates with me too. It can be fun, but not when you also need support.
Autism is so complex. My close relatives are autistic & I thought that I knew alot about it, but my partner is different again. No two humans are the same.

Thank you and everyone for your posts; I'm new here and feel that I have finally been seen. Your posts @Scaredandconfused123 touched me deeply, and your emotional journey is so similar to what I have been feeling and thinking. Lots of other similarities too. I too am wondering what to do and how to move forward (alone or together).

I hope you don't mind me asking, but has anything changed since you wrote last?

There isn’t many of us here anymore.
But you can join us on the new thread HERE
Youll be very welcome :)

Thank you very much, have moved over there :)

@Scaredandconfused123 i have an autistic DH, diagnosed about 8 years into our 12 year year relationship. He is a great dad and very affectionate. I do find it hard that he doesn’t seem to need deep dialogue or to see friends, but he has become a bit more sociable for our DS’s sake and I appreciate that.

Dh (undiagnosed ASD) behaviour is deteriorating in response to DS (diagnosed ASD) age 15 aggressive behaviour.
Everything Ds has a meltdown DH thinks that by responding aggressively that he will solve it all. Instead they are both escalated and I end up having to take DS out in the car to allow DH to calm down. Myself and Ds drive for about an hour while Ds is deescalating also.
I'm tired, exhausted, worn down, fed up, and mad at all of this crap.

I had this. Had to end the marriage. It's tough.

@FleurdeLiane and @Lakeviewhouse ,there is anew thread going on HERE if you want join us.
Everyone is welcome :)
Sometimes, knowing that other people experience the same can make a huge difference.