What is the age gap between you and your partner?

[VanillaSox]

Missing on a statement made by someone on a recent thread that 'there should be no more than s give year age gap'.
My bf is seven years younger than me and exh was 6 years older.
I have friends and colleagues of all ages and don't know how old they are never think to ask and yesterday a collect I get on very well with in and out of work mentioned their age and they were eight years younger than me.
Why are some posters so fixated on age?

He's older than me I should add

Was10 years younger just left me for a girl 10 years younger than him

He is 11 years older. No idea of why some people are fixated about age - I couldn't care less about DH and my ages.

Just 12 days between me and DP. He is the older one!

2 years

9 months. I think I was conceived on the day DH was born - it was my parents’ wedding anniversary!

Dh is 15 years older than me.

6 years older

My DH Is 7 months older than me.

@VanillaSox

Why are people fixated on age?

I think this comment shows a degree of naïveté about people, age and relationships.
Age does matter.

Every now and then there are posts here, usually from women in their 20s, who jsut started dating men in their 40s, or early 50s. So there are 15/20+ age gap differences between them.
They come with - does age matter? We don’t feel any different with them? They treat us nicer than younger men, they are full of energy, etc. Why shouldn’t we be together…..

And then older women, in their 40s-50s tell them - well… People age. And when you are older yourself - in your 40s for eg - your partner will age just as well. And a much older partner becomes a lot less energetic and will be in a very different life phase sooner than you know.

Ot there are women in their 40s who get together with men in their 20s - who are 15+ years younger, etc. And of course that also has its issues when their men are in their 30-40s and women are in their 60s and of course that doesn’t necessarily last.

So - yes. In some ways age doesn’t matter.
There are some differences probably up to around 10years either way that isn’t that noticeable and doesn’t really matter.
But larger age gaps do matter and do affect people’s lives.

Dh 8 years older.
Agree it doesn't matter when you are older. If you are 40 and say a friend is 48 = nothing. When you are young it's significant. You wouldn't want your 16 year old dd going out with a 24 year old.

I think age definitely does matter sometimes if you have a gap so big taking you into another generation. I also think it depends if you are 22 dating someone who is 37 it's too much.

We are the same age, there is only a few months gap. We met at 18 and married at 20. I agree that age is not as important when you're all older adults and now I have lots of friends of different ages, loads of whom are 10+ yrs older than me. However obviously didn't when we met at 18!

When I was young I really only dated older men.
DD father was 15 years older than me.
Since I turned 40 I've really only dated younger men, last FWB was 33 (me 48 then)
I've never been married or had a relationship longer than 3 years.
I wouldn't want to become someone's carer or have any partner become mine, regardless of age.

Don’t let people worry you. Mine’s 19 years younger and I’ve read some nasty things on here about those kind of gaps. If you are happy together who cares? X

I'm 51 & he's 4 years younger.

I remember my old landlady saying 'always go for a younger man as men die first...'

It certainly worked that way for her.
She married a man her own age, both lived healthy lives & she outlived him by about 15 years.
After his death, she had a full life, children, grandchildren, extended family, plenty of friends (mostly widows...) but never another man.

He's 4.5 years older than me.

DH is 4 years younger than me.

I'm nearly 7 years old than dh (he was barely 21 and still in uni when we met!). No one has ever taken issue with the age gap as far as I know - though I suspect his family may have raised a few eyebrows initially and assumed it wouldn't last.

That said, I always dated guys older than me (in early-late 30s at the time I was dating) and dh was by far the most mature and together guy I've ever been with. He's also far more mature and responsible in many ways that I am, even now. 😂

He is eight years older. We got together when I was in my thirties. We first met when I was in my late teens. It would have been weird to start a relationship then, even though I really liked him.

6 years. He’s older.

12 weeks

16 days

My DH is 12 years older than me. Got together at 24/36 and still together 22 years later at 46/58.

I’ve never felt the age difference and I don’t think he has either. It may well become an issue as he ages, I guess.

If I’d have been 18 and he 30 when we met I think it would have been more problematic. A bit pervy/pathetic on his part. But I had a career, my own flat, car etc when we met and was a functioning adult, so it didn’t feel like a weird gap.

My DH is 13 years older than me. His ex wife was 9 years older than him. He has gone from one extreme to the other🤣