Page 10 | If you saw a neighbour having an affair?

ReneBumsWombats · 05/01/2023 14:17

bathsh3ba · 05/01/2023 14:12

@ReneBumsWombats people are allowed to do pretty much anything but I'm allowed to have my own opinion about it too! I think the world would be a better place if we were less individualistic.

The world would be a better place if we operated by the principle of "first, do no harm". Which absolutely applies when charging into the personal lives of strangers about whom you know nothing.

Imposing yourself, unsolicited, upon the lives of people you don't know because it satisfies you is about as "individualistic" as it gets.

Fivesixseven8 · 05/01/2023 15:10

I've recently been sent a similar anonymous email. It was horrendous to find out that way, without proof or knowing the person and their own agenda.
But saying that, I don't think I'd have found out otherwise and I'm glad I now know.

Neveragain85 · 05/01/2023 15:16

I've just found out I was cheated on & wish someone had told me

Daffodil63 · 13/01/2023 01:27

I’ve just found out that my husband has been having an affair for 25 years-imagine all the people that must have known. Her adult children knew, my neighbours probably knew, her work colleagues definitely knew as did her friends, and members of her family, and there’s always someone that knows someone. Knowing would have given me choices. I would have been so grateful to have received an anonymous note. Being kept in the dark is cruel. The most ridiculous thing my friend said was that people would have assumed I knew and accepted it! Couldn’t be further from the truth.

Moser85 · 13/01/2023 01:49

I'd want to know.

A few people said maybe they have an open relationship, maybe they do, but statistically he's more likely to be cheating, also if the relationship is open then there's no harm done by telling her.

She could already be suspicious and he could be gaslighting the hell out of her so it may not come as a shock but could help her.

Snugglemonkey · 13/01/2023 01:51

Not your circus, not your monkey, not your business. Stay away!

Daffodil63 · 13/01/2023 08:28

People that generally say “Not your circus, not your monkey, not your business” have probably never been cheated on. You can’t imagine the pain and humiliation

CornishGem1975 · 13/01/2023 11:59

Daffodil63 · 13/01/2023 01:27

I’ve just found out that my husband has been having an affair for 25 years-imagine all the people that must have known. Her adult children knew, my neighbours probably knew, her work colleagues definitely knew as did her friends, and members of her family, and there’s always someone that knows someone. Knowing would have given me choices. I would have been so grateful to have received an anonymous note. Being kept in the dark is cruel. The most ridiculous thing my friend said was that people would have assumed I knew and accepted it! Couldn’t be further from the truth.

25 years?! We're there no signs, at all?!

Mardyface · 13/01/2023 12:04

Daffodil63 · 13/01/2023 01:27

I’ve just found out that my husband has been having an affair for 25 years-imagine all the people that must have known. Her adult children knew, my neighbours probably knew, her work colleagues definitely knew as did her friends, and members of her family, and there’s always someone that knows someone. Knowing would have given me choices. I would have been so grateful to have received an anonymous note. Being kept in the dark is cruel. The most ridiculous thing my friend said was that people would have assumed I knew and accepted it! Couldn’t be further from the truth.

I'm sorry this happened to you. What a shock.

WednesdaysMentor · 13/01/2023 13:13

I caught my neighbours partner having an affair, i didnt say anything as i wasnt 100% sure but had a good idea. They split up about a month later as he left her for the other woman.

CannonCaboodle · 13/01/2023 15:58

Stay out and stop projecting.

Hawkins003 · 20/02/2023 16:21

CheeseOnToastFan · 03/01/2023 09:30

I have found out that one of our neighbours appears to be having an affair. He is married with a child. We don't really know one another although I know his and his wife's names. I don't know the woman I saw him with.
I don't know whether to post an anonymous note to his wife or not.
I also don't know if my own experience is affecting my judgement. Years ago, one of my neighbours tried telling me my own husband was having an affair. She didn't do it directly and I didn't cotton on so it was only later when I found out about his affair that I realised what she had been trying to tell me. I felt grateful she had tried to intervene.

Any updates on how it's progressed op