Should the guy always reach out first after sex?

[Fallingslowly26]

Have always expected the guy to be the one to make the first after having sex with them for the first time - whether by phone call or by text.

I have always been of the firm belief that if they don’t get in touch the next day that they’re just not that into you.

Is this an outdated mindset? Or is lack of contact after sex from the guy a strong indicator that he isn’t interested?

I think it is indicative of some people thinking sex is no more than eating a packet of crisps. Throwaway attitude, that it's just a bit of fun. Having said that, I had this conversation with my brother who would sleep with girls a lot when he was younger, not realising that they may be wanting a relationship - he didn't care.

I'm not sure women realise that some men will happily have sex with a woman they strongly dislike if it was given to them as an easy option.

But why do some women sit on their hands? Honestly all this game playing stuff is exhausting. Just text if you enjoyed yourself. That goes for men or women.

@Lpc3

I'm not sure women realise that some men will happily have sex with a woman they strongly dislike if it was given to them as an easy option.

This is what my male friend told me too

@Lpc3

I'm not sure women realise that some men will happily have sex with a woman they strongly dislike if it was given to them as an easy option.

I couldn't stand my ex for the last 12 months of our marriage. Didn't stop me having sex with him though.

None of this is linear, it really depends how you feel about sex in the first place imo. I don't see it as a gift I'm giving a man. That's just weird to me.

@BuddhaForMary slightly different as you were married! A very small percentage of women would be happy having casual sex with someone they didn't like let alone hates. A large percentage of men would. That is the difference and that impacts why men should be the ones reaching out first.

[quote Lpc3]@BuddhaForMary slightly different as you were married! A very small percentage of women would be happy having casual sex with someone they didn't like let alone hates. A large percentage of men would. That is the difference and that impacts why men should be the ones reaching out first.[/quote]
How is it different? Being married didn't mean I was contractually obligated to have sex regardless!

I know plenty of women who just want someone to take home on a weekend, they don't seem to care much about who it is 🤷🏻‍♀️

I know women who have random hook ups with ex's who openly say they can't stand each other but the sex is good.

Well most married people are living together, probably sleeping in the same bed. There are repercussions of suddenly pulling back sexually. Presumably married people didn't start off hating one another. To say it's the same as going out on a date with a guy, finding him pretty horrible and then choosing to have sex with him is a stretch!

@Lpc3

Well most married people are living together, probably sleeping in the same bed. There are repercussions of suddenly pulling back sexually. Presumably married people didn't start off hating one another. To say it's the same as going out on a date with a guy, finding him pretty horrible and then choosing to have sex with him is a stretch!

I'm not saying it's the same. I'm saying it's possible to have sex with someone you hate.

So true.

If you contact a man, who, in this case, is obviously not interested, it just makes you feel worse about yourself, when you're ghosted/ignored by them.

Not to mention, the real shot to your ego but you asked for it.

If a man is interested, there is nothing that will stop him from contacting you!

When a man hasn't contacted you within a few days, after your 1st sexual encounter, he's not interested, period, and he, for a fact, doesn't want to be bothered by your text message.

Meow, that dosen't mean, you are no longer, that hot little sex kitten you thought you were, it just means, you're not his hot little sex kitten.

Let destiny take the wheel, don't force it.

In my experience, if a guy is truly interested, you will know. You won’t have to chase them.

I used to always text a man after we slept together for the first time (assuming I wanted to see him again anyway). Sometimes I'd do it when he was still on the way home!

Seemed like a sure fire way to tell him I liked him and would be up for seeing him again, I don't know why people over complicate things so much.