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Original poster

How much did he/should he spend on your engagement ring?

455 replies

BlingRing1 · 03/03/2021 22:22

Just curious what everyone's thoughts are nowadays? I've heard of the '3 month's salary rule' (although i also heard it was 2 months and 1 month, so who knows!), but that's from a long time ago. Is it still relevant now? If not then what is better?

How much did he spend (either in £ or relative to salary)? Was it more or less than you thought/hoped he would?

Does it matter to you (honestly!)? Should it matter?

OP posts:
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Original poster
BlingRing1 · 03/03/2021 22:24

I guess I should start.

I think it should bear some relation to your salary/wealth. It would be hard to take it seriously if a millionaire bought you something tiny. Equally, if someone unemployed got a massive loan for something huge, that'd be an incredibly bad start to marriage. I'm not sure 3 months is the right figure though.

Mine is worth 2 months salary from his job (after tax), however he gets bonuses and owns and rents out property too, which increases what he earns overall and I know he is able to save what it's worth in about 6 weeks. He probably could have spent more, but he's very frugal so I never expected he would. Plus, i don't think I'd want to wear anything much bigger on a day to day basis (I wouldn't have said no to a little bit bigger though!).

Overall, I think if you can easily afford it then it's not enough, you need to wince just a bit as you hand over your card!

OP posts:
SandrasAnnoyingFriend · 03/03/2021 22:25

What a load of outdated sexist bullshit

oohmyback · 03/03/2021 22:26

My ring was £500. It was a lot of money to us at the time. (2004) But by no means 3 months salary...or even 1 month! We bought it on a credit card, we needed to be able to pay it back. If we'd wanted to spend 3 months salary we'd still be waiting lol. It's a lot of money to save up however much you earn if you live to your means.

oohmyback · 03/03/2021 22:27

I'm glad we didn't spend any more, I can't even wear it now anyway due to swollen joints.

MetroMan · 03/03/2021 22:27

You sound like a grabby so and so

Outbutnotoutout · 03/03/2021 22:27

If he bought me a ring 3xwages, that would be £7500, which is crazy.

I guess about £2000/£2500

cosmicbabe · 03/03/2021 22:27

Haha you're obviously annoyed he didn't spend more then...

MichelleScarn · 03/03/2021 22:27

Who cares about the person giving it to you, as long as he SPENDS on it..... what do you plan on buying him?

VanGoghsDog · 03/03/2021 22:28

Good god, are you for real???

bonfireheart · 03/03/2021 22:28

If I had to buy a ring at x3 months salary that would be £9000!! I'd rather have a car or a nicer kitchen with that much than a ring lol.

Reinventinganna · 03/03/2021 22:28

Nothing, it’s a family ring and I adore it. It’s beautiful and has lots of meaning.

I find it ugly and depressing that people may have the same views as yours.

DianaT1969 · 03/03/2021 22:28

I have never been a jewellery person, so would prefer to spend it on something that matters.

partyatthepalace · 03/03/2021 22:30

@BlingRing1

I guess I should start.

I think it should bear some relation to your salary/wealth. It would be hard to take it seriously if a millionaire bought you something tiny. Equally, if someone unemployed got a massive loan for something huge, that'd be an incredibly bad start to marriage. I'm not sure 3 months is the right figure though.

Mine is worth 2 months salary from his job (after tax), however he gets bonuses and owns and rents out property too, which increases what he earns overall and I know he is able to save what it's worth in about 6 weeks. He probably could have spent more, but he's very frugal so I never expected he would. Plus, i don't think I'd want to wear anything much bigger on a day to day basis (I wouldn't have said no to a little bit bigger though!).

Overall, I think if you can easily afford it then it's not enough, you need to wince just a bit as you hand over your card!

We’re delighted for you OP. Is that what you wanted? 🤔 You could post a picture as a follow up 🙄
PurpleDaisies · 03/03/2021 22:30

My ring wasn’t expensive. I wouldn’t have wanted something expensive or flashy. The concept of linking to salary is outdated and I can’t relate to wanting someone wincing to pay for a ring for me - talk about grabby.

It would be hard to take it seriously if a millionaire bought you something tiny

Why? It was the intent behind the proposal that was important, not the ring.

AnneLovesGilbert · 03/03/2021 22:30
Hmm
LondonTTC · 03/03/2021 22:30

Mine cost a couple hundred pounds and I was thrilled with it. I'm so touched that someone I love, loves me enough back to buy me a ring and ask me to marry him. That's it. Couldn't care less what it looks like or cost.

WolfHunter · 03/03/2021 22:31

Another £0 here. It was his grandma's wedding ring. I love it.

Outbutnotoutout · 03/03/2021 22:31

My first engagement ring cost £15 at the half price jewellers, but I loved it, I was 16, married at 17, divorced a year later 🙄😂

WolfHunter · 03/03/2021 22:31

Engagement ring that should be. Brain fart!

MissingLinker · 03/03/2021 22:31

Overall, I think if you can easily afford it then it's not enough
I'm not sure that's a good stance to take on any purchase, others may disagree.

Honestly, I wouldn't want to marry someone who expected me to spend more than I could afford on what is, really, a completely symbolic gesture.

Borntohula · 03/03/2021 22:31

If anyone bought me a ring that expensive, I'd question how much they actually knew me tbh. I also wouldn't want some generic piece of rubbish. I guess engagement rings aren't for me.

MrsBrunch · 03/03/2021 22:31

I can't remember. Does it matter?

BatleyTownswomensGuild · 03/03/2021 22:32

FFS, why does it even matter? What's more important - the ring or the marriage?

Frenchdressing · 03/03/2021 22:32

@SandrasAnnoyingFriend

What a load of outdated sexist bullshit
Yep
CoastAlong · 03/03/2021 22:34

wince just a bit as you hand over your card

That sounds so grabby, also very foolish.

I don't think it matters whether it costs £10 or £10,000.

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