DH called me a 'fucking bitch' during sex

[Thenforgiveme]

This happened a few months back but it's still playing on my mind.

DH and I were having sex. He was getting pretty carried away and was talking dirty (which I don't mind) Then he suddenly exclaimed 'Oh you fucking bitch'

I didn't like it and told him so. He apologised but I still feel really odd about it. I consider myself far from a prude but it just seems like such an unpleasant thing to say to your wife in an intimate moment.

Am I being silly?

I agree,seems a bit odd x

Wouldn't bother me in slightest

That would bother me a lot. I'm assuming he watches porn.

That wouldn’t work for me. Did he explain why he did it if it’s not something the two of you would usually do?

Porn talk. I don't think I'd be too worried as long as it's a one off. Next time, maybe call him "you fucking prick" and see if he says anything...

Wouldn't bother me in slightest

Same

That's horrible. I agree it appears he's into degrading porn.

I wouldn't like it, would make me degraded.

would bother me

I would think he was a bit of an insecure dick who had watched too much porn. Would not have been impressed or found it a turn on.

@WouldstrokeTomHardy I think it's a matter of context. We have young dc and sex isn't as frequent as we would like. I wanted to reconnect and be intimate. To sudden be called a fucking bitch was really jarring!

@pregnantGotCovid I would assume he does sometimes but it's not something that has ever been an issue between us.

Completely unacceptable in my world. I can't imagine my husband would even think to say something so degrading.

In general that wouldn't happen in my sex life but there have been some particularly lively sessions where that would have been in fitting with it... But if it was just out of the blue then it's a little odd.

@AnneLovesGilbert He said he got carried away! I remember the days when him getting carried away during sex involved him saying how much he loved me over and over

Very porny. 'Whore' is another one.

Thanks for the update OP. If he was aware of that then it's not cool at all

Well that would shut me down.

Also, to me it indicates he was lost in a fantasy of his and not having sex with you at all. That fact that this is new is making me wonder what his recent porn looks like.

Too much porn

It's not silly to feel what you feel, whatever you feel. Does he know it's still bothering you? Is it representative of a general decline of affection in your relationship?

@HighSpecWhistle

Porn talk. I don't think I'd be too worried as long as it's a one off. Next time, maybe call him "you fucking prick" and see if he says anything...

Won't necessarily work. He might even like it or play into some kind of rapey fantasy.

No cheers!

You told him you didn’t like it so hopefully he won’t say anything like that again. It’s not a good thing for him to have said, but I wouldn’t think about it again.

@EarthSight

Also, to me it indicates he was lost in a fantasy of his and not having sex with you at all. That fact that this is new is making me wonder what his recent porn looks like.

Yes, exactly. It was his fantasy, not a shared one. There's no wonder it's bothered you, OP. You were both doing same thing, but clearly with completely different thinking behind it.

@Eckhart Our relationship has been going downhill since our second dc was born tbh. I don't think he particularly enjoys being a father.

I keep thinking about it and it just makes me cringe and feel sad at the same time.

@HighSpecWhistle Yeah he'd probably love it if I called him a fucking prick. He seems to really get off on any sort of dirty/taboo talk.