What to make of this comment?

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Hi guys just after some casual advice
I've been in two mentally and physically abusive relationships over the past 10 years, and now I'm currently in a new one and all seems to be good. He is twice my age but that doesn't matter as he is sweet loving caring and behaves in the same manner as me
However for two days now he has made the comment of "I wouldn't want you to get bigger than you already are" (I'm a size 12 and have been for years only been smaller in my teens)
Is this a dig at my size? I'm unsure of how I'm supposed to feel about this comment
Any advice would be great x

That comment would set off alarm bells for me. Who does he think he is commenting on your weight? Nah I would end it for that.

I wouldn't feel good about a comment like that. It's not up to him to put limits on your size.

He’s telling you that your relationship is conditional on you looking a certain way. Are you happy with that? If not, I’d tell him so and be gone.

This is a huge red flag. Proceed with caution. Any man in a new relationship who wants to impress their beau would never put down their lady. This looks like the beginning of a controlling behaviour. Please be aware if you have had several abusive relationships then you may find you are sub consciously attracted to another one. But, well done for flagging this up, you obviously have learnt that this is not normal behaviour at the beginning of a relationship and you don’t feel it’s right. That’s a great step into keeping yourself away from more abusive relationships.

I would end the relationship for that comment. Sounds controlling and conditional on what you look like. Big thumbs down from me 👎

Yeah red flag
Have you done the freedom programme?

It's also a red flag he's twice your age, regardless of how "caring" he is, he sounds like an entitled sleazebag tbh.

It’s not to do with whether a size 12 is fat or not.

I've met men like this. I could be wrong but it sounds like the tip of the iceberg of more controlling behaviour.

He'll start (has already) to undermine the little confidence you have to make you feel insecure.

I'd get out now or at least open your eyes and be on high alert for any more fly away comments or behaviours.

Run it past us here if you like.

I’m sorry but you’ve found yet another abusive relationship - but you know that don’t you. If you stay with him, he’ll gradually get worse & you’ll be the frog in the pan 😢 it’s good that you recognise this isn’t right, now you just need the courage to end it!

Yes he’s controlling.

And yy to his age being a massive red flag too - have you read Lundy Bancroft?

It’s common for someone to keep
Getting into controlling or abusive relationships - I would suggest you read that book at the very least.

This will get worse for you. You know it's wrong. End it!

It starts like this this then gets worse and worse. Tell him to get stuffed.

To give you guys some more insight, this man left his family for me, and is currently in the process of divorce and remortgage
He has nothing except me In his life and I feel guilty bout walking away as he has given up so much for me and is planning the rest of our lives together
I am 26 and 5ft6

Agree with others, this is a red flag. Get out now before you become more invested in the relationship.

That makes it worse.

Op that context simply adds to red flags

You are young please take time to focus on you counselling and freedom programme

It's not a dig at your size.
It's designed to keep you unsure and grateful that he is with you.

What are the chances that his wife found out about you and dumped his sorry ass? Or that she is over size 12?

Do you want to be with man who makes his love conditional of dress size?

How old is he?

Oh christ, op. Go carefully.

He should still have a relationship with his children. I hope he's working hard on being a good father to them.

You're only 26. Really do you want all this baggage of guilt and drama in your life? A much older man who'll start showing it yet has made clear what you have to look like? I assume he looks like George Clooney, does he?

You need to get out as quickly as possible, you are 26 and a normal healthy weight. It sounds like you were having an affair which doesn’t bode well at all for a good future relationship with you. Just leave and hopefully he can patch up his marriage and his children will forgive him. This will not end well.

He is starting the control. Why would you want somebody so much older than you, somebody married. You are the "prize" in the relationship and he will start to erode your confidence so you are not tempted to stray.

I think you need some time on your own. And think about what you want from a relationship, and hopefully that involves not getting involved with somebody already married.

Have you tried talking to him?
I have had similar and told him to shove his comment where the sun don't shine. Ironically my partner has now put loads of weight on . I tell him all the time that he needs to loose weight but he dosent care and neither do I really. Just want him to be healthy and comfortable in his own skin!!!!!

Massive red flag.
His circumstances make it worse.
Really well done though for spotting it - that's such a step in the right direction though.
It doesn't matter that he left his wife and family for you - what matters is that you're using it as a reason not to leave. Did he put that in your head?