Dating thread 151: We are the prize...

[30somethingandsingle]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

@tillyscoutsmum not sure I’d cancel mr lovebomb straight away. I would see what your chat with mr slightly too short brings up. Mr smiler sounds nice.

@shitwithsugaron and I bet he was no oil painting himself! I've seen a profile on Bumble when seemed normal but ended his profile with 'no lard asses'

Well Mr SA has totally messed with my head and is continuing to do so, I’m not sure why I am allowing it . In a total mess this morning and taking some time out. I’m not in a great place. Signing off from life for a few days.

Aw @Lovemusic33 be kind to yourself

Tilly Mr Smiler sounds great. I'd keep them all ticking over, to be honest.

Love take the time out you need

shitwith what a wanker. I don't like any negativity in profiles. Although one guy told me he swiped right on loads without looking and then 'weeded them out' later. Said I'd made the grade. Tosser. I messaged him to say he hadn't ...

love be kind to yourself. In my limited experience...if a person keeps you on the hook and wants it all their way and then realise you're more than willing to drop it....they start pulling out all the stops. I kinda suspected he would do that when you sent your message and stopped replying.

Yes supercali has it. Can you block him everywhere?

@Sunshineandflipflops it's awkward when you see people on there isn't it?! I accidentally matched with one of the dads from school who I've always been friends with... at the time I actually thought he was still with his wife and he started completely avoiding me in the playground for a while 😆

I keep being messaged on Fab by men I've seen on OK Cupid and Tinder ...

Aww Love, I feel for you. It's hard keeping your resolve when you do actually like them and have the feels. Stay strong. I've found it helps to write about them, just to yourself, but as if you're explaining the relationship to someone else. You then see in black and white what's wrong.

@Wishywashy6...maybe he is still
married and that’s why he avoids you!

@Lovemusic33 Big hugs. Remember actions speak louder than words. I find just being away from my devices really helps at times like this. Just leave them in another room and resist the urge to keep checking them. Keep busy with work, binge watch a series and be kind to yourself. Hope you're not away for too long x

@Sunshineandflipflops haha no they had definitely broken up. This was about 18 months ago when I first joined the apps, I eventually got so fed up of him running off I made the first move and we had a joke about it.
He's with someone else now (as am I) and we're back to being mates!

@batshitcrazywoman same here - men from Fab turning up on Match. Have to say there's more honesty on Fab! Everyone is very up front about what they want!

I have seen loads of people I know on tinder and 1 on fab. Thankfully on fab they don’t know it’s me. On tinder I just swipe left and think I am doing nothing wrong and we all appreciate discretion!

love I am sorry! Be kind to yourself

Ok so a month ago I was talking to Mr Tall. Wow he was so lovely, we had a great lunch date and arranged a second but then he disappeared so I assumed I was ghosted. He got back in contact last night asking why I had ghosted him!! He sent me screen shots of his WA and the messages I sent him are not there! They are still on mine but showing as unread. Could it be a WA error or is he a player? He was the first and only guy I have met that I would potentially want more than FWB from but I really really don’t want to be played!! Any advice?

@Marlboroandmalbec34 I'd be wondering why it took him a month to get in contact. He could have deleted the messages without reading them. Then again he could be genuine. Maybe meet him again and see?

@Marlboroandmalbec34 I wouldn't bother, I've never heard of anything like that happening. I think he is playing you.

Marlboro can I ask you whether your Mr Tall lives in the south of England? It is just he sounds a bit like my Mr Much Younger who regularly takes days to read my WhatsApp messages, and he is also very tall!

@Marlboroandmalbec34 those would be quite some lengths to go to though - I have had the odd WA message go astray - I'd say maybe meet him and see too, if you did really like him?

@Lovemusic33 I'm sorry to hear you are feeling shit, I agree with @supercali77, take all the time you need, we are here for you

I'm feeling quite smiley about Mr Italian this morning, though I was the person that suggested meeting again on Saturday and I am worried that was too keen! There had been quite a lot of kissing and hugging though by that point. He is rather lovely, funny and clever and gorgeous ☺️

Thanks everyone. The thing is I am not looking for a relationship happy to stack up a few FWBs but I really did like him BUT I think you are all right and I will ignore. The thing is he had my number, had my Facebook details, he said I disappeared off WA but he had other ways to contact me

lillyrose no we are north England