Dating thread 151: We are the prize...

[30somethingandsingle]

Dating thread rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Do unto others as you would have them do to you.

And a reminder - you don't know them until you know them!

Link to Info on Dating Websites & Apps https://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/3514717-List-of-Dating-Site-Info-Dating-Thread?watched=1

Thank you for starting the new thread. I will report back on my date with Mr Eco Warrior tonight.

Good luck with the date @LilyRose88

Good luck @LilyRose88

Mr S wanted to come round again tonight, but I'm ill.. typical!
We are trying to sort child free time so we can actually go out and spend the night together too (currently I don't let him stay) so frustrating that our dates are clashing.

lillyrose that all sounds ver exciting and have fun this evening.

Does anyone have any experience of Hinge can’t get my head around it?

Good luck for tonight LilyRose.

@MyOldBrainStoppedWorking, it's most definitely not you. Lots of people just have a "type" and one of the perils of OLD is that they'll find lots of their type looks wise and if you're not it there's nothing you can do about it... If you didn't have to send your face shot separately you wouldn't even know that they've seen your pics and carried on swiping. We all get swiped left probably hundreds of times a day without knowing it. I've got long, dark hair, most guys seem to prefer blondes ime, some even start chatting, then tell me they prefer blondes 😂 WTF??

Good luck tonight LilyRose

So, this is slightly odd, not quite sure what to make of it - Mr Italian, who I have a second date with on Weds, has removed me on Match!

I just went on as a message had flashed up and he is no longer in my queue, or in my favorites. I don't think there is a way to actually unmatch as far as I can tell, I think you have to actually block!

I don't know how to take this - perhaps he doesn't want to see if I'm online, or perhaps he doesn't want me to see him - or both! I kind of feel like i want to jokingly call him out on it when i see him, but then it also raises the fact that I've been on there and maybe takes us to a conversation we're not ready for. Aaagh - minefield!!

It is obviously fine if he's chatting to people (as am I) as we've had one date and I think he's a pretty honest guy, but, I don't know, it just seems slightly weird! Thoughts anyone?

@MyOldBrainStoppedWorking yes don't take to heart, everyone has types, and you'll never actually know why. I think it's easy to think everyone else is dating by this thread and question oneself but stay positive. You are the prize!

That is a little bit odd. I don't use Match so I'm not au fait with the system but do you think he has just deleted his profile?

He obviously likes you because you have another date arranged. I would ask him when you see him. I wouldn't text him about it.

@LilyRose88 I did wonder that - I don't think there is any way for me to really know if he has deleted it or blocked me! He hasn't removed me from WhatsApp so he definitely isn't ghosting me.

I think I will ask him when I see him, though of course that means me admitting I've been on there! ☺️

leonasa it’s so awkward when things like that happen. When are you not seeing him? I think your best bet is to drop it into convo somehow. It might be just be a glitch with the site. But maybe it’s a good idea to see if you are on the same page ie your still on the site and he’s not. I’m sure he hasn’t ghosted you

leonasa apparently it's common on tinder...so mayve match too...that folk will unmatch or I guess block to remove the paranoia/double checking activity online.

Thanks @Still18atheart, we are seeing each other Weds so I shall raise it in a teasing way then and see what happens. Tbh I wouldn't mind if he had decided to temporarily come off, I'm kind of a one-guy-at-a-time girl myself and when we talked about the dating world on our date we both basically said that. In fact on Saturday I was going to suspend my subscription (because it's bloody expensive and my other irons are on WhatsApp anyway) but it had renewed already.

My concern is, does he actually want to massively play the field and not want me to see? We're obviously not exclusive so fine in that sense but it would seem a bit dishonest after the way he's presented himself.

@supercali77 yes which does make sense in all sorts of ways.

Marking

Good luck Lilyrose - Update awaited.
leonasa - He's most likely taken himself off now you have a 2nd date. If he asks for a 3rd, maybe say something like 'I'm thinking of suspending my subscription, not sure if it's possible?' Hopefully, he'll then mention what he's done with his.

Waiting for MrWow to arrive. MrGardener is getting a bit anxious as I've not replied to him about tomorrow! I've already canx him once before for someone else

Placemarking. Still feeling a bit weird about being exclusive with my now former fwb but it's going ok.

@myold I'm thinking it's like the Marie Celeste!! I seem to be swiping right loads but not even a sniff!! I'm finding bumble as barren as the Sahara!! I'm tweaking my distance filters that much I'll be matching with a Martian 👽 ffs!!

So Mr Russian wants to progress..
We didn't have a good time on Saturday. Awful weather. He disliked the place I wanted to eat. Grr
And wanted to walk out the cinena half way through..
I was kinda disappointed. But annoying behaviour.
But before saying goodbye we had the awkward chat.
Shame the chst didn't happen after a fun date.
So now I'm doubting things.

Unique- why progress if not fun??

Thanks TooOld. I'm not going to worry about it and yes I will bring it up in some way/ or just feel out where we are if things progress.

Good luck with Mr Wow! (I think I'm overinvested in you and him ☺️☺️)

Definitely think the dating game has its peaks and troughs. And the troughs are downright disheartening.

unique shit dates are the worst. But hopefully the next date will be great

@unique1986 why did he want to walk out of the cinema? Was he being an arse about not liking things? I have to say I think guys being moody/sulky when they don't like things is a bit of a red flag..