The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Braving The Wine Witch & Her Alcohol Free Autumn

[Mouseface]

Hello

I’m Mouse one of the Brave Babes who ride on this wonderful Bus, called Gerald, along with all the Opal Fruits wrappers and of course Barry The squid.

We all have a wise variety of life experiences and experiences with alcohol too. We’re not admirers of hang overs and we certainly don’t do judgey pants!

We’re here to ride along with you, when life is pants but also when it’s not as well and you my want to celebrate that bit too much!

So find a seat and come take a ride. I’ll link the previous and also the very first link and the reason we’re all here.

*Mouse

Sofa You’re trying and, in my book, that means that you’re worthy of a huge amount of respect, Don’t give up. Your life sounds incredibly hard, I honestly don’t think that I could cope with what you have to.
I have only managed 18 days of sobriety because it was forced on me by being sectioned. Before this, I think the last day that I didn’t drink was probably about 3 years ago. And the last time I did anything like a decent stretch (about 3 months) was about 7 years ago.
It can be quite helpful to keep a diary and see if there are particular triggers. When I did my 3 months, I used to plan my evenings with military precision eg 6pm clean bathroom, 6.45pm cook dinner, 7.15pm play board game with kids etc.
There are some fantastic blogs out there, I will try and link to some. One thing that really helped me was making myself a sticker chart. It sounds mad but it was actually really satisfying putting a star on my chart in the morning if hadn’t had a drink the day before.
Please stay with us. You will find a way that works for you

See? Sofa I would class that as a success! You managed three whole days. When was the last time you did that? And you've had your drink now AND HAVE STOPPED!!! you haven't staggered to the shop like I would do Don't be so hard on yourself - you are trying to break a huge habit and are doing well! I've have blips since the beginning of September but mine tend to be enormous great BLOOPERS to be honest .

its just that he has tried so so hard and succeeded in his massive battle of addiction and i can't even do this single one,

Heman - you made me laugh! I can't go to the shop after dusk as i am also loosing my eyesight and i can't see a thing after 4.30.. I can't leave the house, otherwise i would end up in a ditch, (and not because i was pissed!!) thanks for chatting to me ladies, i don't feel such a twat now

Day 1 tomorrow.

margie running really was the start of the beginning of me making choices to feel better. I did my second half in October. And booked another for next year pretty quickly. I can't drink the night before I run as i hate the difference. But long runs started to be a trigger for drinking (bloody brain) just being af seems to be working better.

Bee , Learning and Elba hello to other runners!!

Just about to go out for first run in about 10 days. Haven't fully shifted this cold so just a short run.

Day 14 af. Feel good about getting to two weeks. I am another who will need to hate alcohol for this to work. I have had a few more cravings these last few days and each time reminded myself why I am not drinking. The embarising things I have done. The worry 80 units a week caused (rightly so) about health. The impact on my dc. I could go on and on.
MsHoolies your husbands behaviour is absolutely shocking. I hope you can get him off that legal duty as he does not sound like he has your best interests at heart. When you do have leave is there a professional you trust who you can record your concerns around what he will say so you protect yourself? If you have said before hand with a professional then it might take the impact out of his ramblings?

Good luck to all the babes with the weekend around the corner. We have guest's - Who weren't impressed I didn't drink last visit. I think it's easier for me on the second time.

Morning you lovely lot.
I've stopped raging and have come to a sort of quiet acceptance that if I want things to change, it's only myself that can make it happen. There's no point relying on DP . It seems that I'm just existing as an invisible house keeper. His parents are away from next week for two months so I think I shall ask him to move into their house to look after it and see how things pan out. I shall stock up on bath bombs, candles and chocolate and enjoy the silence.
I did have a very small glass of wine last night but at least it wasnt a bottle or two so I can cope with that.
I'm late for work so I don't have time to name check everyone but I have read your posts and am quietly cheering you all on from the back of the bus.

Good luck mint I'm sorry I don't know the back story to this but I hope it all goes ok.

Hi beautifuls......
It's Friday yay
Mshoolie's....stay strong you are so precious.... you are going though such a tough time but YOU RESISTED THE WINE!!! You deserve an absolute medal darling. Well done and then some..... very very well done xxx ((((hugs)))))
I'm on day 5....it's Friday....I'd normally be at the end of a bottle of wine by now and contemplating opening another. I haven't had wine today and it's the first Friday since I can't remember where I haven't drunk. Totally twitching for wine.

Dh just been to shop for a bottle for himself.
Despite him knowing that I am trying to stop.
Despite him knowing I think I have a bit of a problem stopping.
Despite me saying no I don't want any wine thank you im trying to be good.
He is now wandering round with a glass of shiraz.

Torture.
It feels crap. This is how I get. I feel sorry for myself because I feel like I'm missing out. Just feel like I need it to chill and wind down. To feel like something for me not just a housekeeper nanny maid and general dogsbody.
Sorry. Don't mean to be so miserable.

Evening All Brave Babes

How's everyone doing? just bringing the thread back to page 1 so that all babes can find us

Saywhen Day 14 is awesome well done

Sofa how you doing Babe? I agree with the others you got to Day 3 that is a huge achievement Keep posting x

Mint sounds like a good plan, get him out of your hair for a bit and concentrate on you

Margie have a good girlie weekend away - I luffs you too - have fun, eat loveliness and have a bloody good giggle x

Dubh and Sweet check in if you're lurking lovelies - hope you're both ok

Hope so good to see you babe x

Beaches how you doing babe? hope you've got a busy distracting weekend planned

MsHoolies I hope you're ok. I think I actually hate your husband - what a prime fucking wanker - I'm shocked that he would treat his wife, mother of his children this way I can't wait for the day when you can kick his sorry arse out and be free to be the brilliant mother that you are You will be the phoenix that will rise from the fire babe just keep going one day at a time

Doris loved that message - here's one for you:
Life is not measured by the breaths you take
But by the number of moments that take your breath away

Bit of a crappy day today, my job is in limbo and I have to wait until Monday for a decision and then I'll have to decide what to do I've been surviving on 4-5 hours of sleep a night since all this shit at work happened nearly 3 months ago - dobbed my manager right in the doo doo at my appeal today shame I have to go to work on Monday

For any Babe that's struggling, keep going. For any Babe who's picked up a glass or 2 or 3 - if you can, pour the rest down the sink, hide any bottles out of sight or away from the fridge (so they go warm), make a cuppa, brush your teeth, get you pjs on, drink some water, you'll feel so much better in the morning

Sleep well all x

Forever! Be proud of yourself, you are amazing resisting the wine

MsHoolie - you go girl! That's a huge step in the shop. Don't let DH stop your wheel of change from turning. Get into rehab if you can.

Everyone, all you brilliant babes. I love you all and reading all the posts keeps me strong.

Something amazing happened just now. I got a phone call from a cousin desperate for someone to go and sit with her DD as she needs to go to a and e. No one was around to help. I was able to go, and I am here now - because I could drive! On a Friday night! I had sipped half a beer over tea and no wine and stone cold sober. Two months ago not a chance, I would have been well through a bottle by now.

I'm not perfect, a few AF days, a few not but I am no where near drinking what I was. Two small glasses of wine last night and a clear head on a morning more often than not. It feels brilliant being able to help out when everyone else is out or drunk

Hope you are all in a good place tonight, for anyone who isn't I'm around for a chat.

Bee Day 5 is brilliant Take yourself off away from DH, run yourself a lovely full bath, give yourself some pampering time, try not to be tempted. It's a bit shitty that he's waving his Shiraz around Just try and stay strong have you got a TV away from him, could you watch a DVD, Netflix, read a book? Don't crack, just think how good you'll feel in the morning and don't forget to turn the music up and hoover the bedroom very early tomorrow morning

Razor that must be a really good feeling I hope your cousin's DD is ok and doesn't have to wait for too long x

Spanna I'm having a cup of tea in my pjs. It's lovely and so nice to be useful instead of trying to pretend I am less pissed than I actually am in front of DH whilst slopping red wine on the carpet.

Forever I second the do something else Spanna suggests. I stopped reading for a while because I couldn't remember what I had read (or read with one eye because there were Too Many words) and I am really enjoying a book. Earlier this evening I had a lovely bath in the usual WW hour and watched a TV show on my iPad in peace. Avoided the witch and am now clean and sober and relaxed. Even shaved my legs for the first time in months, was starting to resemble a bear

Hey fellow travellers on the bus..... it's gone midnight.....I'm now on DAY 6 thank fuckity fuckity fucks for that!
I did not cave in. I have not had a drink!!!!! Had a shitty night but I HAVE NOT HAD A DRINK feel bloody exhausted though, all this effort is very draining!
I wouldn't be doing it without having you lot on here - talking to people makes it real and makes me feel accountable.
So thank you in bucketfuls.

I'm on day 6!!!!!! Day 6 and never want to see days 1 to 5 again...... xxx here's looking forwards......

forever congratulations first Friday and day 6!!!

spanna thank you - I have made day 15 af despite dh buying me wine! (I have not said I am not drinking. He doesn't have a great relationship with alcohol either.)

My fingers are crossed for you spanna with your work stresses I hope it al turns out ok x

razor that's a great feeling that you could help. I hope it all was ok.

Day 15 af. My first target was day 21 as this was longest I had managed since last pregnancy - it's getting closer. But realistically not drinking needs to be the norm. I have worries about Christmas and a few things going on in December but a day at a time. I won't drink today.

Morning- well a beer Thursday night and 2 last night. Not bad but I didn’t need any of that. Dp is stressed living with my ds and dp is a drinker and we have a pub full of friends at the end of the road. Plus when he’s had a drink his mouth runs away with him. It’s a worry really. Anyway I wish I could report more AF days. I feel a bit of a twat but there’s less desperation to my drinking

Stillearning I can't see a twat anywhere - what I see is a babe who's trying really hard and succeeding Well done for drinking less this week - you've done good, give yourself a pat on the back x

Saywhen thanks Babe, I'm hanging in there by my fingertips Day 15 is awesome I hope you have lots of distractions planned for your usual witching hour, weekends are such a trigger!

Bee well done babe, yay you go girl Keep going, I hope you had a loud bang around your home this morning, whilst DH was feeling worse for wear! Keep going babe - find some things to do just for you tonight

Razor

How's everyone?

ps Saywhen don't look too far ahead - just take one day at a time x

Hey ladies...
Just saying hi.
Everyone who is trying no to drink today - stay strong. There was a reason you made a decision this morning....
I am just literally taking things 1 day at a time . My books I ordered today came- The sober revolution and your 6 week plan. Doesn't look groundbreaking but will be interesting to read and fill in -its a bit like a 6 weeks diary to go with the The Sober Revolution. But it's something to do i suppose. If I've got a book in my hand it's not a glass of wine....
Saturday night is our family movie night...... x factor for the kids..... treats ...popcorn...wine....
I just keep thinking AAAARRRGGGHHHHHHH NO WINE!!!! What am I doing this for, why am I bothering, you deserve it, youve gone nearlly full week, why nit just have a glass?
etc etc etc. Same old lies.
Because I can't just have a bloody glass that's why I would have a bottle. And then a bottle tomorrow night too. Truth is ugly isn't it....
Ho hum.... there you go. My life is riveting lol. Just going to wrestle a massive pumpkin that has been eyeing me up menacingly all week. Today is not a good day for you Mr Pumpkin...Chop chop choppity chop! My mother passed it on after a neighbor gave it her (all farmers) it's bloody massive -she said her arthritis wouldn't allow her to chop it up
Xxxxxx

Just checking in with some good news. Finally got round to putting in a PPI claim using the Martin Lewis templates on Money Saving Expert. Today a letter came to say I am getting a refund of £2,700.
DH phoned to tell me about the letter while I was in a Charity shop, dithering whether or not I could afford a pair of Monsoon trousers priced at £8. I bought them, and the brand new Zara bag with its £30 tag still on, also £8.
Now I can get the kitchen floor fixed and patch up the leak in the roof.

I nearly lost my resolve today.

DH is at work, I had to take the kids to Asda for clothes and Aldi and Tesco for food.

I was so stressed and wound up by —after the first ten minutes— by the end that I was thinking of wine.
I figured one bottle would be fine.
Then I changed my mind. About 5826 times.

Then I remembered the chocolate liqueurs at home. Figured I could compromise with Just One of those. Then I changed my mind 423 times.

Anyway, I came home ate one and threw all the rest in the bin and the bin has gone out.

So I kinda lost my resolve but now we are home and chilled and finished not one part of me wants wine and usually I’d be on my second glass by now because of the stress.

So that’s something.

Ma that is awesome news!!! - I love Martin Lewis, he has truly revolutionised customers/consumers and it's so easy to do. I'm currently going back over every bank account and mortgage I've ever had, since 1988. Most banks have an online form to put in complaint and they have to respond within 14 days that they are handling your complaint. Halifax have just come back to confirm I had MPPI (never knew I had) filled out their questionnaire and posted it today, I'll keep my fingers crossed.
It's so worth doing if you've got time on your hands whilst distracting yourselves from the wine witch babes

I got over £10k in PPI, some shared with 'd'h, some just for me that he has no idea about xx

slings I'm inspired to go for more now...

Go for it ma!

Dingle well done babe