Dh has died and the MN lifesavers are helping us to keep our heads above water

[JuanPotatoTwo]

New thread :). Thought I'd start this one like I ended the last one - Bertie crashed out after a busy day's mischief making.

Hello, sorry to keep you all on tenterhooks. Yes we met and spent just over 2 hours chatting. It was lovely but tried to give her a potted history of the 17 years that led me to where I am so I'm sure she was glad to go home too

I can therefore confirm that she's most definitely not a troll or a hairy trucker or anything like that. And she paid for the and so we need to have another meet so I can repay my debt!

Rain held off but apparently due all night and day. I'd gladly send it your way Magi

Book I don't know how you do it either! I'm probably half your age or thereabouts and I'm on my knees after the day. My mum can never sit down either - not even on holiday. I'm sure that you and your GC will have a lovely close bond.

I had to tip out the water from the drip trays of all my pricked out seedlings this morning.

Cake I am sure ElPeskyJuan enjoyed that meet as much as you did.

How lovely that this thread (which I know is sad) has lead to that meet up.

Cake
I am sure Juan enjoyed it as much as you did.

Weather here can't make up its mind. Sunny, dark clouds, rain spots, wind and so humid again.

Book
You make me tired just read g your posts 😀
I used to be like that not so much at the moment. But I am like that on holiday. Hate sitting around I want to be off exploring and doing stuff.

Well 'school' was fun we did a quiz and my team won😁😁 last open hour for me it's a bit surreal.

Evening all, and welcome dahliaaa. Very nice to have you on board but I'm so sorry that your dh is ill, this must be a stressful and difficult time for you.

Had a lovely meeting with Cake, the time flew by. I wasn't at all glad to go home - could happily have stayed longer. Relieved she didn't notice the hairy hands though ... :)

I had to wait in this afternoon for the plumber (not the nice one, another one. Who is also very nice) and I suddenly got very down and tearful. Came out of nowhere really. I have these pockets of thinking "Where's Mark? Oh, crap he's died. No he can't possibly have. But yes he has, he really has" and it sort of hits me, and I have mini panic attacks :( My neighbour dropped round fortunately though, and I've known her long enough to let go (and she of course also knew and loved Mark) so I felt better after a good cry. And then a neighbour from across the road came by, so in the end it was a busy afternoon.

No real rain here, just a few drops - it's forecast for tomorrow though. Willow well done on winning the quiz! book I knew the answer to my question (about ever having had a lazy day) would be no! I wish I had your energy levels. Squirrels pizza most definitely counts as cheese on toast! Magi I'm getting used to you being nice to me, I'll have to brace myself for normal service returning in a fortnight!

I wish we could all meet up, I feel sure we'd all get on (well, apart from me and magi :) ) even though we're all pretty different.

Well you can hardly say it was shit to meet me on here now can you - not after all that build up

Glad you're feeling a bit better and that you could lean on neighbours. Have turned my phone off as wonderful ex has wound me right up...but hope you have a better night and plumbing issue has a diagnosis.
x

Evening
Nice to hear you enjoyed the meet up Juan - but don't be surprised about the reality hitting you when you least expect it, it's going to happen for a long time. The crying sounds a bit healing (hugs)
The one thing about looking after my lovely DGS - he goes home :) I can get up tomorrow when I am ready and rested, its not day in day out like you Cake .
Oh, I do like pizza Chasing - I don't get to eat it often...
One day I hope to manage to get down south, and I will get to meet you all . It would be lovely :)
Well, I have relaxed right down, done a bit of crotchet - hot chocolate on the menu.
Wishing all a restful night
Thoughts and Prayers xx

One day I am going to get up North & meet you, book.

(And I will be bringing my secateurs - for cuttings!).

xxx

Glad your meeting went well Juan and Cake. Hopefully it's the first of many for you.

One day I'll manage to get back across the Irish sea and hopefully meet some of you too

It's been a beautiful day here today, though yesterday was quite wet. We are forecast more rain tomorrow then a couple of stormy days after that. But knowing how fast the weather here changes it could be completely different.

Morning shift here. Up at 6 to face the day. Rain all day here but we won't let that stop us.

Hope you all have a good day.

Ds1 got up for a drink at 2.30am and I woke up, then didn't get back to sleep properly until 5am. So knackered now!
It was pouring down in the night and still raining now, so my mum will be pleased.

No work today, but I'm seeing a client at 10am - they are in the other direction from me than work so easier to see when I'm not in the office, and I just carry extra hours worked forward as TOIL and take in the school holidays.

Hope everyone is well.

Oh, and the inside door opener on my car drivers door has felt a bit clicky for a few days. Yesterday I got home, pulled it to open the door and the mechanism has snapped and I couldn't open the door! Luckily the boys were with me and jumped out and opening it from the inside, but that's another thing to get sorted. And will probably cost loads.

squirrels took my car to garage this am for service fingers crossed they don't find anything except that dodgy sensor it's cost me enough lately. Cars seem to go for ages them 5 things go wrong at once!

Lovely morning here fingers crossed it stays that way. Few clouds about though. Need to get my ass in gear and do painting. It's just the thought of all the faff involved😀 have other things to do to, beds need changing, garden needs done what choices eh?

Really should check that lottery ticket maybe I am a millionaire and don't know it then I can hire someone else to do it all for me😀

Morning all
not raining so hard this morning yet - just a gentle drizzle

Cake - good luck on the day
magi - just let me know - :)
there is nothing worse than waking up when you have just enough rest to make it hard to go back to sleep , but at least you don't have to flog yourself at work Chasing . And those niggly mechanical things are a right pain on cars
Hope everyone has a good day
Thoughts and Prayers xx

x post
thats me as well Willow - bed to strip, bathroom to clean , but at least not painting ( hate that job)

Beautiful day here, the forecasted rain has failed to appear.

Hope everyone has a good day x

We've had a splash in puddles and now I've got soup on the go for lunch.

So rubbish at caring for myself so are making sure I eat something that feels nourishing at least once a day.

Anxiety high today so just trying to keep busy and ignore my emails but DH has left his phone at home, so where he'd normally ping me, he can now only email - catch 22. Can't turn it off while kids are in school either - just in case.

Going for a jog in the rain tonight. Can't get any worse than it was on Saturday when I had very little oomp left.

First 'coat' done, think it will need about 3 anyway to cover the plaster up. Joy!
Having early lunch then off to do beds and tidy my bedroom, its the 'dumping ground'.

Cake sorry you arent feeling 100% today, hope it improves. You are making me feel bad, my lunch is a salad sarnie and crisps! Am gagging for something sweet but nothing in the house (on purpose!) Have some stewed fruit I did yesterday will have it with some plain yogurt and hope that helps

Someone give me a kick to get going again please?

Hope your client meeting went well Squirrels - will you be able to have a nap before the boys get home from school?

Lucky you Juan getting to meet up with another MNer. I sometimes meet up with DutchOma for a knit and natter. You have lovely neighbours too.

I live in Northamptonshire - surely that's the middle for meet-up. I can recommend a fab tea rooms that do a great cream tea. You lot could finally hammer out a definitive answer to one of the great MN debates - jam or cream first! I can't help on that score as I don't like jam and I'm allergic to cream.

It's raining cats and dogs here (sorry Magi) and we have discovered that one of our drainpipes has come out of its housing so I've had to put buckets underneath to catch the downpour. I'm really hoping that it doesn't mean that the house is on the move again - we had issues a few years ago and had to get it underpinned.

Added to that DS has been off school poorly this week. He's on the mend now and will probably be back tomorrow. DD2 is on half term and is still in bed revising hard for her A Levels. I'm just taking orders for lunch. Cheese on toast anyone?

Kick kick . Hope the car service isn't painful Willow.
I popped to the garage with mine and he had a quick look and booked it in for next week, it's manageable atm as I can open the window and pull the outside handle to get out, but a bit of a pain - especially with the rain.

Sorry you are feeling down Cake, hope the run he's - failing that, some ?

I'm just back from my client meeting, actually the undertakers who dealt with John's funeral so I collected his ashes as well. In 4 lots as his children each wanted some and his mum. No idea what I'll do with my 'pot' of them. I don't think I want a memorial or anything, to me they aren't 'John'. Probably go in the cupboard. I did receive a miniature rose from someone after he died that will need potting up, maybe I'll mix the ashes with compost when I do that.

I'm still sitting in the car on the drive as it's pouring down again and it's nice and warm in the car and I thought I'd just check my phone before I head in.

Working 3 days a week is good in that it gives me some time, but in other ways that time is weighing heavily on me. I still have lots of Estate things to sort, but am struggling with getting down to it.

The WAY forum is helpful in terms of people really understanding, and closed so I feel I can post some things I wouldn't want to post on an open forum. But it's very slow moving, and I don't want everything to be about John's death - and this thread really helps with life going on type things.

It's raining harder - maybe I'll just have to get wet ....

Bucketing down here.

I've shoved my face full of biscuits after that semi healthy lunch...

It's ex related (almost always is). He's asked to change contact arrangements next week. I've agreed in principle to things so it suits me and I don't lose out on time with DD, but he won't like it. Bully who doesn't like it when someone doesn't say "how high Sir!?" when he says "jump" He hasn't responded so it's been since last night that I'm dreading it...

I'm sure the jog will help clear my head.

kick for Willow

Hug Squirrel I like the idea of planting it with a rose. They're pretty indestructible plants.

I have one that I planted during my MC and every time I see it bloom it does make me smile. I don't do anything to it either (other than maybe a bit of dead heading).

Ha ha thanks ladies

Have done another coat of paint and the kids beds and picked up the mountain of clothes all over their bedroom floor! WHY cant they put pjs back on the bed? Is it some kind of childhood joint failing? They can slide them down but cant bend over to pick them up again?

Have also done a bit of tidying in my room, just a bit. Put another washing on and sat down again as back really starting to hurt, its a PIA.

Am waiting for kids to come home to see what duvet covers they want to keep, have at least one or two that are really to young for them now. TBH they could do with new beds and matresses too, more expense!

I like the idea of planting the rose with the ashes, much better than a pot. I never brought ashes home for my parents, I just didnt think it was 'them' any more, the pots would have just been in the back of a cupboard somewhere, it just didnt suit me at the time. I never thought to scatter them in the garden back then, that would have been nicer my mum and dad loved the garden.

Just had bird nesting boxes delivered! When the roof was redone they came back and sealed the top of the wall to the underside of the roof joists with cement. I didnt realise that they had to do that now. So my lovely sparrows are homeless and my regular visitors the house martins are now 'home' from foriegn parts and have nowhere to nest! It was really upsetting me seeing them swoop to thier usual hole and cant get in

Checked with landlord and they are fine with boxes. How I will get them up there I dont know unless NDN takes pity on me and puts them up, I may have to pay someone!

Cake dont let the B get you down. Pass me a biscuit please, even a crumb will do

Another carefully aimed kick for Willow I don't mind painting, it's all the faffing around you have to do before you actually put roller to wall that gets me.

Chasing that's a lovely idea for planting a rose. I think Juan was considering something along those lines too.

A for Cake because it sounds like you need one x

I'm off home for lunch, I'd love some cheese on toast please Woolly!

We now do have the predicted rain, it's bucketing down.

Afternoon all
not bucketing it down here, just steady heavy drizzle. I was good and stayed at home and cleaned a bathroom and stripped bedding instead.....
kick for Willow - 3 coats?? I am a very impatient painter- 2 coats =1 day painting, but 3 coats means the mess is out for another day.
hello Woolly ! 2 DC at home , under your feet ? I would have loved cheese on toast :) , but DH was getting scrambled eggs ready .I had popped out to the library . ( on a side note - I won in the 'which queue to join to fill up the car' - I never manage to get the quickest one usually!) The scone debate - sorry I am a total heathen , its butter and jam here
Chasing - when things are not right, time can hang very heavily indeed. Love having to wind the window down to open the door!
(We had a friend a few years ago who had bought a brand new car, with a sun roof. Drove home with it open ( it was a very new thing to have in those days) When he got home, the sunroof wouldn't shut, and it started to rain.He had to open a golf umbrella through and over the gap until he could drive it back to the garage :))
Cake (hugs) - anxiety is the pits, so don't worry about biscuits .
On a general gardening note - , though you may know Chasing - don't put too many ashes in the pot - the plants really don't like it much....
I am being quiet today - DH has hoovered while I was out, tea is ready. I am going to potter in the greenhouse in the dry, ( I love being in there while it rains) and finish a crotchet square .
Have a nice afternoon all x