DRY 10!!!!

[CheesyNachos]

Welcome! This is the thread for those of us who want to abstain from alcohol. We are all at different stages of our journey, and many of us have some hiccups along the way, but we are committed to an exciting, fulfilling, joyful life alcohol-free.

Previous thread is here.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2485290-DRY-9?pg=1

Everyone is welcome!

I am lo carb so yes it is an issue ~
Fre is nice but v high carb

Ahhhh, I was very bad tonight...

Told my lovely darling stepdad about little brother's problems :(

Hi all,

been absent for a few days...life has been getting in the way of MN. Will catch up on thread.

I wasn't as keen on the Fre glad was nice enough but prefer the Eisberg. They are a real help to me at the moment. Day 26 today and finished counselling. It has come to a natural end. Am looking for support groups nearby as I want to keep on top of it all.
Don't know if I read it here but the expression 'sobriety delivers everything alcohol promised' says it all. I was looking in a bottle for relaxation, peace and calmness. I got this from not drinking! Who'd a thunk it. The bottle poured me irritability, tension and worry (with a barely there buzz). No brainer really but I just couldn't see it. Denial is a very strange thing!

Hey Yellow and everyone.

Good mantra, yellow.

Am struggling here. As mny of you know, we had some serious IL health issues. FIL recently contracted pneumonia and has passed away. MIL still in hospital and not really aware. We have extended family staying for a bit, to help sort things out..... I am triggered all over the place. People in my house crying, grieving, drinking. Mainlining cranberry juice and lemonade, but am not sure I can keep on track. It is overwhelming.

Off work again thank heavens. Have to go back on Tuesday. Have spent the past few days washing bedclothes, cooking, taking people to and from airports and train stations.

so so tired.

Cheesy so sorry to hear of your loss lovely. Try to stay strong but understand how difficult it must be.

So sorry to read of your loss Cheesy. Wishing you strength to get through each day. You know that a drink will not make any of it easier to cope with... hard though that must be to remember with all those triggers around you. Can you get to a meeting?

I am listening to Caroline Knapp's "Drinking: A Love Story" on Audible at the moment and it is taking my breath away with its descriptions of the 'broken' inner dialogue of the dysfunctional drinker/alcoholic/call it what you will. I've also been told of an amazing novel worth reading called The Empty Room which is next on my list.

cheesy I'm so sorry xxx

teapot I think I will order that book. I am feeling a bit 'now what?' at the moment. But I have felt like that before so I'll be ok. I've also been thinking about drinking. The good news is that I am playing the tape forward and pausing well before the end of the film. I couldn't even face going to bed squinting and passing out let alone the hangover.
I guess I am trying to say that I don't even want to get drunk or feel drunk anymore. Before it was the thought of a hangover that stopped me.
I may be feeling a bit meh today but I have never enjoyed myself as much as I have since I stopped drinking.
Stay strong sober warriors!

Sorry for your loss cheesy

Don't know if it helps you or any others here, but lately I've been trying to not just abstain, but actively replace bad with good, so taking lots of vitamins and supplements, eating lots of fresh raw veg and fruit, drinking water with lemon etc etc so that I feel like I'm actively doing something really good for my body in a time of crisis, and not just not doing something bad, IYSWIM. Seems to be working. It's filling the gap and making me feel more positive. It also of course makes me feel physically much better!

Dona and yellow I adore the concepts of playing the tape forwards but hitting pause, and that sobriety delivers what drinking doesn't. I'm going to keep those in my head on days when I'm sorely tempted (many at the moment - tricky divorce).

Thank you all - I love this thread

once like you I am also trying to treat my body as a temple (rather than Satans toilet) yes it does help. I'm exercising 5 times a week eating more food both good and bad (wine was my evening meal) I am mid forties menopause is looming and I have a lot of repair work to do!
the tape thing has stopped me from hitting the 'fuck it' button this week so as a sober tool I really think it works!

Am so sorry you're having such a terrible time cheesy why not try some meditation/self compassion type fellas on you tube to calm you. You are fantasising that a drink will calm you and take away the pain for a good few hours so stuff the hangover. It's not true. Tops you'll get half an hour of a buzz and the rest will make everything loads worse. It's so hard to lose the dream that there's something there to help when it all goes tits up. All I know at the minute is that it's not alcohol. Keep strong and brave.

Wine was my evening meal too, dona. Some blood results have suggested slight malnutrition, which has spurred me on to treat my body with a lot more respect and kindness. The only thing that worries me is that I have form for being in temple mode for a time, then getting bored and rebelling, so I need to be mindful of that and not let it swing back the other way.

Cheesy/all, we need to make sure we take the time and space we need to take really good care of ourselves amongst all the difficulties. I read somewhere in AA context that it's important never to let yourself get too tired, too hungry, too angry, as this will lead to turning back to old crutches. I'm trying to live by that too, as I know it is definitely true for me.

Dear Cheesy so sorry to hear your sad news. Please know that I'm thinking of you. It sounds like you're having a heck of a time at the moment, on top of the already difficult time you've already had.
Yes, if you can get to a meeting then do that, you need to take care of you and really try not to drink.....what a challenge for you. You've been so incredibly supportive to all of us for which I am so grateful so I'm really, really rooting for you right now.
You know how much I love AJ NOOOWW......try his "Healing" app. I've done the stop drinking for 3 weeks and I've now moved onto the Healing one. It's awesome and I listen to it (sleep to it really) in bed. I think it might help, it's worth a try. My thoughts are with you girl, you CAN do this xx

Cheesy xxx
Thinking of you all, hang in there Sober Warrior!.

But all of that is really Wolfie calling . So I stopped after one glass.
Oh this is all so crap. Off to bed with AJ NOoooow

Well done glad for seeing it for what it was. Pat yourself on the back and see you in the morning

yep I stopped after the one glass. I hate Wolfie. He is a shit.

Glad well done for stopping at one glass. I'm not surprised you feel how you do, it sounds like one hell of a difficult time for you
See you tomorrow xx

oh glad you poor thing. You've done fantastic to stop after 1 glass. Well done. Am thinking of you. xx
Nowhere near in comparison but had my 1st 'social event' last night. Big night out that I was obliged to attend to support family. Nearly burst with tension before. Thought I'd be ok but was so uptight at not drinking. Almost like a mild panic attack. WTF! Actually when I got there it wasn't so bad. Quite a few non drinkers really. had a becks blue and calmed the fuck down.
Hangover free this morning but my ;wobble' has shaken me up a bit. Feel a bit down.

Yellow (can't do the linking thing sorry) don't be down. It's brilliant to go to a social thingy and not succumb to a drink. You should be really pleased you passed the test! Your post made me laugh. Have great sober weekends everyone. Is anyone else's husband jealous of AJ? Mine has got a bit of a problem with him, says AJ gets in the way at bed time!

yellow go you on the social event!
Absolute my OH thinks its funny :)

Have picked myself up today after last night. Feel sorry I cracked and poured a glass of wine, but glad I only drank a small amount and then realised that was not the way to help myself, so poured it away.

Bottle followed it down the sink asap! F**k you Wolfie I am NOT going back to drinking!

Well done on pulling it back glad.

I am in Scotland with the DC, having taken the sleeper train last night. I was almost violently pre-menstrual and found the whole experience shockingly stressful - not least because when we arrived I was told by the 'host' on the train that I shouldn't have been allowed to book the arrangements I had and that we would all three of us have to be in a space which sleeps two people. She assured me it was for H&S reasons and so I obviously agreed. However when I asked her a few minutes later if I could take the bedding out of the cabin that we would not now be using (but that I had paid for) she told me she had sold it to someone else now.

My head was about to explode; I felt totally ripped off, as though she had bumped us into the two cabins so that she could specifically sell my cabin on to solve a problem for another passenger. Wandered down to the "dining lounge" to be confronted by a huge wine list and whisky list and hordes of people drinking and socialising on what seemed like a big jolly for everyone else bar me, who was facing the prospect of being a bag of hormones with two giddy children and none of us getting much sleep during the night. I don't often have them but I really did have very strong cravings to press that fuck it button... Made it through without succumbing, but it was HARD. I don't very often feel at the mercy of that simmering cauldron of hormonal craziness, but it was Not. Good. Timing. Urghh.

Hey checking in briefly before going back to the fray. Thanks so much everyone for your supportive messages, they have meant more than you could know.

glad. Hope you are okay. What a week you have been through.

Teapot kudos Sober Warrior. What an experience you have had. Can you remedy it/complain/get justice? I have treated myself to the book you mentioned upthread. LOVE all the book and blog suggestions.

OnceMore your words about taking care of ourselves really really resonated. I read them this morning (but did not have a chance to reply) and have been focusing on them.

Thanks everyone.

Eiseberg AF rose has been my saviour tonight. That, and knowing all of you were behind me. :) [slightly weepy]