Dating, Loitering and Sofa Surfing, It's All Happening! Dating Thread 16.

[TimeForMeAndDD]

In continuation from previous thread:

Watch do not talk exclusivity until you have assessed the contents of his trouser department after the 5th date. Only after you have assessed the contents of his trouser department the 5th date do you decide whether or not the willy he is worth the commitment.

And yes, of course you go on Friday!! What on earth are you thinking woman! Today you were the BOSS of a coconut shy, a few of his friends will be nothing compared to that!

I've got to go make coffee, I've just watch Paying it Forward and I am in bits! BITS!

Maybe he is saving ejaculation for date 5??

Nope. Not once. Most perplexing. He did appolgise, Said it was too
much wanking.

But that it didn't matter. I on the other hand, and dont read this, if you dont want to know..... Enjoyed clitoral orgasms, g spot orgasms and ahem, anal ones too. Lots of Times. I do not think in my entire life ( which has hardly been chaste) that I've ever had a night like it.
I'm still very shocked. I had him pegged as something else entirely.

He did ask about doing it again lots of times. It was the last thing he said when he left too.

But, I'm not convinced. Hes been in daily contact since we first met just over 2 weeks ago, so I guess I'll know by the end of the day.

Watch - sounds like you had a great night, why do you think he sounds like a player?

Well I just thought I would check in as I havnt been online for ages! I am fed up with plenty of fish, it gets boring and I'm fed up of having boring chat with strangers!

Also I seem to be I'm the terrible habit of sleeping with random people when I'm drunk that normally I wouldn't sleep with. And afterwards I don't want to know them. If they text me I'm not interested and feel like I should text back so that they don't think I just wanted a ons. I feel like I am turning into a man and just using them for sex and that's it.

Although there was one guy I liked who didn't call after!!

I think my problem is a complete lack of sex.

Also fwb has been implying that he loves me by saying do you think it is possible to love two people at once? And he has very deep feelings for me

I don't tend to do ONS though have had one or three since my ex, to help me get over him. Which it has cured my fear of sex

I am not missing sex at all
Phone my solicitor today. Mixed feelings about it.

watch are you sure you're not just preparing yourself for the worst, by saying you don't think he will be in touch? Maybe because you are experiencing something you never have and it all seems to good to be true. Protecting yourself maybe?

because frankly, noone is that good without a lot of practice, AND he did drop odd things into the conversation, past experiences/ women, why do men do this?? he did appolgise.. but still. doesnt make me think good things. but then i trumped his experiences... and im not a player.. so?

anyway, its been text, text, text already. all filth mind you... i expect ill be seeing him at some point before friday......

its just that once sex is brought into it, i tend to think all the other side of the person, bar their sexuality gets forgotten about, or thats certainly been the case for me. which i didnt really want to happen, i kinda wanted someone to like me for me, not because of my sexuality/ chandilier swinging antics.

not sure, i did the same thing late last year, early this year. due to lack of sex too i think. but maybe i just needed to get it out of my system? i just decided after a sucession of crap sex, that it was leaving me unfulfilled and it was because i wanted something more than a quick shag.

watch excellent for the filthy sex, if player alert is on amber, just leave it there for a bit until it moves one way or another....and you'll know by the end of the day. I wouldnt be even slightly bothered by him not coming, it's no reflection on you at all.

Watch if you feel it is becoming all about sex, and you aren't happy with that, then tell him, remind him you are about more than a body. You are as much in control of what happens as he is. If he doesn't take the hint and attempts to continue in the same light then you can decide whether or not you want to continue seeing him. Communication is the key. Talking. Men don't read signs, they need telling straight

Oh, cross post, good.

Think youre right though, the sex line has been crossed, so it'll be filth, filth, filth until thats out of the system. He can still like you for you, despite the filth...in fact the filth is just an added dimension of like, really...

time - its a possibility, maybe. my brain automatically thinks ' he was just after sex, hes got sex, thats it'
its my default position, based on the last 3 or so years experience.

oh, im seeing him later.......... :) :) :) :) :)
and tomorrow.

well. erm.
yeah.

ill take some of that.

thats ok isnt it, to have a lot of sex, and still not have worked out if its going anywhere? yes?
im not doing myself some diservice? or ruining anything by doing so? because i do like him......

Mlm - how's things going? Whats going on with the ex and the solicitors? And as I havnt been on the thread for a while I didn't hear what happened with just friends?

watch, sweetheart, you say you don't want a relationship anyway, so yes, lots of sex is fine, it's great! As long as you are happy with it. If at any time you don't feel happy, then talk to him.

Oh, and as you have already planned dates 5 and 6, I would say this is most definitely going somewhere

watch I think I get what you mean, I've only ever had 2 relationships of any kind where I actually felt they liked me as a person, not just because of how I looked or dressed or how good I was in bed (and of those one was a disaster because the sex when we finally did it was awful - but the other one was the best relationship I've ever had :)). Hence why I've resolved to give up on ONS in the hope of snaring door man an actual boyfriend.

Look at it this way, you like him AND you know the sex side is good (would be much worse if you liked him and it wasn't, trust me I've been there - see above). It certainly doesnt sound like he's disappearing any time soon, so enjoy it :)

oh, cross posted.. yeah.
filth is ok ;) i am more that happy with the filth :) i am shocked, and surprised at his filthyness, but damn, it is good.. being somewhat of an experimental/ filthy girl myself, i welcome it, it is far better than the kiss, boobs, fuck combo that frankly makes me loose the will to live.
And if i think back to past relationships ( all two long term ones.....!) then in the beginning it was just as much sex as was humanly possible.and then some more.

so - thats ok, yes? it should be like that.....

amber player light can stay on, till i know more, so, thats fine - good advice snape.

time - no, im not worried about that yet... i think im just going to have to go with the flow here, and see what happens......

yeah - im seeing him at 5.15 today. and then tomorrow at the same time. i think hes just going to stay at mine for a few days actually....

erm. he did say about his band again.. and asked me to come. and then asked if i couldnt make this one then i would have to make the next one.

so - urgh, i dont know.
i would like a relationship - obviously i dont know if id like one with him at the point, i dont know him at all, so i guess this is what you do, hang out, have lots of sex, find out about each other....

sponge - yeah, that was my frame of mind, give up on so much sex, in return for finding someone who really likes me. so ive sort of seperated out relationship and sex into two different things, where one means you cant have the other. a silly thing to do, obviously.....

Yes, this is what you do,, it's called 'getting to know each other' And look at what you have discovered in the last 24 hours! You have found a man who dates you, who didn't rush you into bed, who appears 'normal' AND, he is into filthy sex!! You now need to know how good he is with a hoover and washing dishes, you may well have hit the jackpot!

Yes, just go with the flow and enjoy it. Don't over think or analyse it.

thats a very very hard thing to do time! lol

but you are right, of course.
he did tell me he liked me alot, this was at the end of the date sex
and he was amazingly complimentary, the whole evening. from telling me how beautiful i was, or how goregous, or how sexy, or how amazing my body was possibly he needs glasses or just complimenting everything, but not in an awful, sleezy type way, or a trying to get me into bed way, it was mostly while we were doing stuff... and then obviously mixed in with other stuff.

and, he literally loved my whole body. Toes!! who knew!!! i have never been into toe things, feet freak me out a little, now they do not.... and ears, and hair, and armpits, and wrists, and just everywhere. just all of me. Now that comes from someone who loves women.... esp as he never came, not once.

Think Time has hit the nail on the head :)

It does make me slightly optimistic I might actually one day meet a half decent man who doesn't just want to shag me.

I suspect if I did I would probably collapse in shock, as if the weekend is anything to go by there's no chance of it happening any time soon...

sponge - indeed. me too!!!
hence i supose why i assumed post sex that that was it, didnt really even consider id see him after that. i was wrong it seems....

and dont get me wrong, i am very pleased about the filth.i was a little worried that i might eat him alive, and i need a partner that is sexually more adventrous than me, and has a higher drive, or isnt threatned by mine. you would think that would be easy, but its not. ive had fwd and a past boyfriend that cant handle me :(

and sponge, it could happen at any time. ANY TIME. Obviously i have no idea what this is, or where its going, but i only met him just over 2 weeks ago.... and tbh am totally blindsided by it all a little bit.

I have never had a 4th date since i was 20 or something, i just couldnt see how that was ever going to happen, like, how on earth do you get to 4 dates? it just seemed impossible that was going to happen. And now i have 5th and 6th ones.. so, yeah, it can happen.

I'm really pleased for you watch :)

I hope it happens to me too, I really do.

My friends I saw at the weekend all now seem to be really keen to find me a 'nice' man to date, which is lovely of them and probably at least in part because the one at the party was so unsuitable (they are all really happy I'm not seeing him again!). So we'll see what happens with that. And I can contact door man at the end of the week, who is really nice - just remains to be seen whether or not he is single and/or actually has any interest in me!

This is really filthy sweet. :). I'm really pleased for you watch. :) :) :)

sponge - yay to people on the lookout for a man for you
and exciting about door man... !!!! its nice to have a crush isnt it :)

Ive just booked for a free haircut with trainees... bah, my hair is frankly ridiclous, and is amost waist lenght now, and its free, and the trainer is the woman who taught my usual, wonderful hairdresser... so it cant go wrong, surely? shes assured me she will oversee, they have graduated too, and she wont let me leave unless i am happy.
madess? or clever, money saving plan?

I'm really pleased re my friends actually, I have spent a lot of time with them this weekend and has definitely made up for the recent crapness of my old schoolfriends who upset me over my party etc.

and I do have the most massive crush on door man in case anyone hadnt noticed even just thinking about him makes me all stupid and smiley. Which probably means it will end in tears.

Hair will be fine :) Think positive. Just keep an eye on how much they're taking off!

alot needs to come off anyway, its too long. who has waist lengh hair at almost 34! all the layers need cutting in again too. and ive grown out my fringe, so that needs sorting.

crushes are nice, that whole butterfly thing, and the grinning and thinking about them al the time. crushes are underated. and i reckon there are a lot of women who would love to feel like that.. you know. Enjoy it :)

watch am happy for you,5hrs n he never came.am jealous i wish it was me .lol just enjoy the moment and be possitive.The last time i had a good sex,it gave me some kind of confidence and felt on top of the world but this guy seem to be playing games with me,moving house,flat tyre,work,travel etc.now hes got a bad back bcos he fell of his bike,been at hospital,thinking of me,love me,bra bra bra.The thing is i do have feelings for him maybe due to the good sex and misses him a lot.Ive sent him a get well message(thus if hes actually hurt his back).