Dating, Loitering and Sofa Surfing, It's All Happening! Dating Thread 16.

[TimeForMeAndDD]

In continuation from previous thread:

Watch do not talk exclusivity until you have assessed the contents of his trouser department after the 5th date. Only after you have assessed the contents of his trouser department the 5th date do you decide whether or not the willy he is worth the commitment.

And yes, of course you go on Friday!! What on earth are you thinking woman! Today you were the BOSS of a coconut shy, a few of his friends will be nothing compared to that!

I've got to go make coffee, I've just watch Paying it Forward and I am in bits! BITS!

Hello!! It's my boys birthday today! He is 2!! Can't believe how fast its gone.

I am spending today with my boy and a good friend

watch I am so glad you are enjoying Mr lovely. It's good when good things happen.

And good things are happening for me. :)

Why are there so many twats on dating sites? I was meant to be meeting someone tomorrow evening, we exchanged numbers and everything but not 1 text since we arranged to meet, is this normal? God I'm rubbish at this, I think it'll be easier staying single!

happy birthday to your ds!

hoops - yep, happens all the time, he might have disappeared, he might be in contact an hour before? best is to not chase after him. if hes not in contact by tomorrow lunchtime, then you just dont go.

yeah, its is good. and i am enjoying it, lots. Im having odd momments where i wonder what ' it' is, or where ' it' might go, but im pushiing them out of my head as soon as they get in there.... because im enjoying it, and its all exciting and fab.

Hoops - there are a lot of twats on dating sites, tbh if they can't string a reasonable sentence together in either their profile or their 'hello' message, I can't be bothered, but its interesting what you say about texting before a date - in my lengthy experience I've found one guy who seemed to want to sabotage the date every time by asking if I wanted to bale out for some reason beforehand (turned out he was shy!), another who loved chatting in the middle of the night but rarely texted and was completely silent for several days before a date, the date went well tho anyhow. I tend to get nervous before a first date and I imagine many guys do too - maybe he's waiting for a 'looking forward to seeing you' text to give him some encouragement?

watch sounds like you're having a fab time I've texted the waste of time, sorry, you're not good enough for me and you're not worth my precious time

watch - - very pleased for you - the early days are fantastic aren't they?? I've had a first date with a really nice guy, we've texted endlessly since (getting rather TMI, which is nice but makes the next date a bit ) but he hasn't suggested another date - I tried to suggest a very last minute drink on Sat eve but he wasn't feeling well/too tired so we left it. Its very hard to read their minds isn't it? Most of the guys I meet at least say they fancy me, compliment me, but he's said nothing :(

i am having a fab time :)
I called him after breakfast, while he was on the very busy bus into work...
and then gave him phone sex :) and he couldnt do anything. So funny :)

hes just text me ( now hes at his desk) ' im so distracted ive just plonked two unopened packets of sugar in my tea!'

;)
I love it, its nice to be able to have fun with somone again, like that, you know.

watch, it so is - i was having a lovely time like that with a lovely guy til I found out he was a lying cheating bastard ... oh, and married... why me?

rask - :( sorry, what a knobber. Not your fault though. Mr lovely def isnt married, or anything.

Just managed to catch up as I've been off work and with relatives/DC's all week.

Brilliant news Watch - he sounds perfect for you

Hay to dates SPonge

Lubey so glad you have met someone lovely

Time hi

Watch

I am trying not to either overthink or sabotage Weds. I have certain concerns*, but trying to remain open-minded about it & just see what he's like when I meet him. I'd be surprised if it leads to a second date but then my luck surely has to change sometime.

*One issue possibly is distance. He lives 15 miles away BUT on different sides of the Thames. And of course I don't drive. I've found in the past that guys who live over there are really not keen on the journey, I've had at least 3 who asked for dates then flaked beforehand once they realised how far it was (except I dont really think it is that far, but then I'm not driving it...)

yes, yes, yes sponge.
mr lovely still lives at home!! and doenst drive!! and lives 10 miles away in a rural town.
Do you remember my panic about the same thing, i also, literally i nearly cancelled 10 mins before i went on that date, over it. Fucking stupid of me. hes lovely, and im having a blast.
because i had pre concieved ideas of what those things meant, noone of which have proved to be an issue at all, or not so far.
Just because ' some men' in the past, might have had issue, and you dont know for certain that they did.. they might have said that as an excuse. but it doesnt mean that HE will.

This is true :) tbh, when I met the evil Ex he lived quite nr where I do now and I lived back in Essex, and he never moaned about driving over to me (and this is a man who detests driving!), he used to do it about 3x a week when we first met.

Having said that I've remembered Weds date lives a bit further away, just mapped it and its 25 miles . Oh well there's always Mr Chicken who lives a 5 minute walk from my house...

Sponge - 25 miles is nothing when you fancy the pants off someone! Think positive, you're going to have fun and in a couple of weeks you'll be trying to work out which of these guys most deserves your attention ...

watch - he is/was a complete tosser - last thing he emailed to me was - if you ever have time to listen to my story ..... - WTAF !

if you meet somone who you click with any distance doesnt seem to matter much, there are ways of making stuff work. 25 miles is jack all. dont write someone off, before you have even given them a chance.

Ok, I will wait for Weds and see. I know what you mean about distance but it's a weird thing, possibly local to here, lots of people I know in this area (male & female) would be like 'Oh I cant date someone from Essex because it means going over the bridge/tunnel' and ones in Essex are the same about people living where I do! Problem is you tend to come up in matches for these areas on sites because as the crow flies we're only a few miles apart...

yes, but, ' lots of people' might say lots of things. Dont listen to them, just do what feels right.
if you meet him and want another date, then you have another date. Dont think about that as a barrier, 25 miles is nothing sponge, its nothing. Ive dated men who lived hours away. People do. All the time.

Just have the date, and take him on the merits of that date, and that date alone. Not things you have come up with in your head, or assumptions you have made about things. Just go by how you click, how he treats you and how you feel in his company, because, essentially, that is all that is important.

sponge - I know what you mean about the river being a bit of a boundary, but I live on the opposite side of the M25 and I'd go to Essex for a date!! (desperate emoticon) ... if he was that lovely, I'd even go twice

Honestly, its all a bit of an ephinany for me.
No that im counting chickens, or even know whats going to happen. Just that if you let go of the ' he must be this, and he must be this, and do this, and not this' type stuff, and just go on how the date was, and how you feel with him, and how he treats you, then that is SO much better, its getting to know the person, not a set of credentials.

And also, that you cant race these things, and they are what they are. At the momment i want to rip mr lovelys clothes off every time i see him. And thats fine... and that might be all that it is, or it might not. but i cant stamp my feet and demand things, i just have to let go and go with how im feeling about him, and how i feel when im with him and how he is towards me. If he starts being dickish, then thats that... or we sort it out... and thats kind of how relationships start i supose.
( just because its been so long since ive started one, i had forgotten, and maybe internet dated so much, that id reduced men down to tick boxes of requirements, when it doesnt work like that at all)

raskolnikov

watch I know what you mean, and you're right :) I do tend to go on dates full of optimism though not that it lasts (this is for me a lot of thought!)

I have a friend who lives in the West Country, she has to drive 25 miles to the nearest shop - and that's not a supermarket, just a little corner shop Spar type thing. She used to live near me, and thinks people up here are weird about expecting everything on their doorstep :)

I'm not going to think about distance any more and just see how Weds goes. I'll still be if there's a second date though!

Watch, he texted last night about how much he'd enjoyed himself and would love a repeat performance at the weekend.

You'll need some bigger boots Child :o