Dating, Loitering and Sofa Surfing, It's All Happening! Dating Thread 16.

[TimeForMeAndDD]

In continuation from previous thread:

Watch do not talk exclusivity until you have assessed the contents of his trouser department after the 5th date. Only after you have assessed the contents of his trouser department the 5th date do you decide whether or not the willy he is worth the commitment.

And yes, of course you go on Friday!! What on earth are you thinking woman! Today you were the BOSS of a coconut shy, a few of his friends will be nothing compared to that!

I've got to go make coffee, I've just watch Paying it Forward and I am in bits! BITS!

Well I've just had a text asking how much kissing I can stand?

Quite a lot actually, looks like being an interesting date.

Watch, that sounds an amazing evening! I'm so jealous - but really happy for you too. I love the way he was holding your hand, etc, even with all his friends around.

Sponge, you're right, I never have a problem with men talking to my boobs - they'd need a magnifying glass first! Though sadly being flat-chested doesn't mean that clothes fit well - I can't wear low-cut tops as they look really strange with no cleavage.

Anyway, away from boobs ... I'm so glad your BF has made it her mission to find out what's going wrong/find you a man - she sounds great. I also agree with you about it being hard to find decent-looking men. It's not a matter of being fussy, but there has to be some attraction there, or you're not going to want to kiss/have sex with them. This is where I often go wrong - I message someone who seems nice, rather than someone I fancy, and the first date often goes quite well in a 'friends' way, but there's just no attraction there. Having said that, I recently spotted a man I know on a dating site. He's quite attractive in real life, but his photo was just awful! So in some cases the reality when you meet them might be better than you expect.

MsCello, I'm 45, and also in London, but having no luck with dating sites at the moment. Which site(s) are you on?

Miranda, sounds like things are going really well for you and Mr Nice. Another success to give us all hope!

Hello to everyone else and hope your snogging date goes well today Isis!

Libby my BF is great, I'm very lucky to have her. I'm sure we will get to the bottom of it somehow!

Have had lots more messages (mostly deleted) on POF. One who is my age, not much in the looks dept (judging by his one photo, but as you say that might be misleading!) and no children, but lives only a few streets away (so I know he will have a nice house and be fairly well off), keeps chickens and seems nice and funny. So he might be worth a date...

I'm also not especially blessed in the boob dept, oh well, I'm quite into running so flat chested is the more comfy (if less sexy) option.
Inspired by success and general activity on this thread I have unhidden my POF profile and am getting a few messages

well I just had my first POF threesome offer
not really up for that sort of thing any more tho

Am busily marking away - having a break right now and exchanging texts with Mr Nice. He has been baking an apple cake.....I love apple cakes :)

Plus looks like I might finish early here today so I should get back to York at a reasonable ish time

Hey everyone. Used to be on this thread under another name (makeyerowndamndinner). Could I re-join please? Have recently gone in for another round of online dating delights.

So... advice needed please. Probably over a year ago now I got talking to this guy online at his initiation. We swapped real life e-mail addresses, discussed meeting up, but the exchange fizzled out after a couple of e-mails (he never replied to the last one I sent and so I just let it go and moved on to the next thing, as you do).

I then saw him again very recently back on GSM. I viewed his profile and almost immediately got an e-mail saying that he remembered me and that he'd love to take me out to dinner. I said ok and we swapped phone numbers and have half arranged to meet up on the 23rd (although it has been decided that I will contact him nearer the time when I'm clearer about what my arrangements are).

That was last Tuesday, and I know that the ball has been left firmly in my court, but I can't help feeling that if he was that interested he would have contacted me. Surely if he was excited about meeting me he would want to keep some sort of momentum going?

I know I could just text him or something, but for once in my life, I'd like to sit back and enjoy being pursued.

What to do ladies?

mercury7 :it could be the same guy who asked me to be his swinging partner,at first he asked if i could let his friend watch while we make love but i knew what he was after.What is it with these weirdos?surely they can join sex sites if thus what they want.
Fuckitthatlldo:it could be he found someone but it didnt work out but dont let him take you for a fool,if he wants to date you now just make him do the chasing up and go with ur eyes wide open.
update:been chating to two men,46 and 50 lol.(they look fit though)Have not dated this ages b4,am 33 and tired of all these young liars out there.Anybody have exp with theses ages?

Fuckitthatlldo - I've made the mistake of assuming that a man should do all the chasing but have recently learnt that they need a bit of encouragement also, esp as you had said you'll contact him nearer the time. I'd do that and not worry :) And - dinner - lovely! I'm lucky if I get a cup of coffee on dates! I was looking forward to dating re being taken out for dinner etc but can count on fingers of one hand how often that has happened!!!

MsCellophane - I'm sorry but what is IR? or was it IE? that you changed your status from "dating" to.

feelinglonely in my (limited) experience the older a guy the better they treat a woman. 30s don't have much clue...40s better...50s the best...but then you get into problems of health and - ahem - being able to "keep it up" so its a trade-off really - health/virility/energy/looks vs knowing how to respectfully treat a woman/more experience at seduction. its a hard call!

You know how it feels rather nice when someone shows some interest and is a bit proactive and seems a bit keen on you? Well we guys feel the same.

If we show too much interest we're pushy or a player. If we don't show enough interest then we're disinterested or a player. As Watch said recently, its just about giving people a chance.

I think IE is Intimate Encounters.

Finished marking the earliest time in the whole couple of weeks I've been doing it for this "season" so am on train up to where my mum and dad (and my car) are and will then drive up to York. Am nicely excited :)

But during our last exchange (which granted was a long time ago now), it was me that wrote the last e-mail and him that didn't respond. So I now feel that if he wants to go out with me it should be him that makes the effort.

I've gone after too many men that I care to remember. I've shown interest and initiated contact. And it never ever ever works. Men say they like women to do these things but in my experience (which is fairly vast) their actions show different. It makes them back off at a rate of knots.

For once in my life I would like to be chased around a bit, wined and dined, and have someone make a bleedin effort. He can start with being the one to initiate contact. Then he can take me for dinner. We'll go from there

:)

Well I can confirm I have a true male friend. Yesterday I was really poorly (getting better now) so he cancelled his date and came over to look after me. I feel very blessed and was woken this morning with a kiss on the forehead. We do spend lots of time together though. Don't think we can be more than friends.

Hello ladies, please excuse me for posting a link on this thread but I am a single mum myself (and have been for so so long now...) and I have recently started finding a little light relief in writing all about my trials and tribulations of dating and singleness. You all seem like confident, sassy wonderful women and I thought you might like to have a read. My first blog post is here:

henrietta-canary.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/snogging-friend-doesnt-make-me-prick.html

other topics covered so far - coming on strong to men, dating a geek,
and more to come - especially as I'm increasingly expecting to remain single for some time...

If you like what you read, please comment/follow/share via networking sites thanks

That link should be:

henrietta-canary.blogspot.co.uk/2012/05/snogging-friend-doesnt-make-me-prick.html

PoppaRob - nice to get a male perspective on things. I've found that if I initiate it never ends well - ever - they just lose interest. My only explanation was that the guys like the chase and if I make it too easy for them they lose interest. Sad but true, in the six months I've been OD.

I hate that that's the case as well. As a feminist it doesn't sit well with me at all. It's not in my nature to sit back and not take any control of the pace of things. But it's true. In fact, if there's a guy you don't particularly like and would like to put off, the quickest and best way of doing it is to tell him you really like him, are free all this weekend, and would just love to get together. All you have to do then is sit back and watch that bugger run!

Bugger.

Because I am a terrible stalker, I have found Barbour on FB.

I have now seen his parent's 'little farm' in the West Country. It is like a bloody stately home. I knew he had money but bloody hell

Makes it even more of a shame that despite clearly finding me attractive and wanting to shag me, he doesn't want to date me.

Twat.

Well I have had the afternoon to end all afternoons.

Met up with my 'friend', ended up back at mine and have had the most amazing sex of my life!
I think it's going to be a fwb type thing, but who cares.
I have never felt more special.
He said I was a fabulous kisser and that I was beautifull.

He wants to meet up again next week when I'm free.
Apparently he's got many more tricks up his sleeve!

Oooh exciting COI. I like a man with tricks up his sleeve

It is exciting.
I've done stuff today that I'd only ever dreamed of.
Shows how boring life with the ex was, he never wanted to try anything different.

Bring it on I say.

COI exactly. Bring it on. I have a night out planned for the 22nd with the girls on which I plan to pull as many men as possible enjoy a relaxing night away from my little one with far too many drinks. This girl is looking forward to partying. LOL

I just had a message from this guy:
www.pof.com/viewprofile.aspx?profile_id=17045146

check the profile text, the big about dogs in particular
ewww