Oh dear humpty how very scary for you. What a tosser. Yes phone the police, in fact phone them anyway and say you are scared, at least that way they will be ready. The chances are he won't turn up, it's nearly always talk. these men are cowards of the first degree.
I remember once we couldn't find stbex. He works from home, in an outbuilding. We couldn't reach him on the phone, he wasn't in his bedroom, office light was off. Stbex is a creature of habit and this was very odd. I soon found myself getting rather excited that he might have had a heart attack or something, in his office and died. He finally turned up, had turned his phone off or something. I was so disappointed. I was seriously hoping that he'd died.
wizbit and jelly hugs to you both. I have no words of wisdom. YOu are all further along the path than I am, but I can try and help just a little if i think of something that might help or comfort.
I know what you mean about being scared of making them angry. My stepmother who is a trained counsellor said years and years ago of stbex that he wasn't a man you wanted to disapprove of you. It's so true he has spent the last day telling me by email what a feckless, lazy spendthrift I am, spending all his money. I don't care I'll just keep on spending it LOL. Infact the emails make me LOL which I reply with often it drives him bonkers. He calls it a lazy reply, that I am not intelligent enough to compose a proper reply. I tell him it's simply a truthful reply because his words ARE comical.
I was in town today walking around with a couple of my children, just enjoying being around people without his anger. he hates people, they are too ugly and fat and common, touching him as they walk past.
Stbex hates larger women in particular, he says people on public transport gave him fleas and he means this in all seriousness. He thinks nothing of shouting " eat more chips" to a skinny woman or " eat less chips" to a larger one ( from a car though so they can't come and whack him).
He despises women I think. He's always commenting on women's sizes on the tv in front of the kids, saying things like" she needs to lay off the pies" I hate this, I hate what it is signalling to my daughters in particular.
I am preparing the kids for leaving. We talk a lot about all the nice things we'll do in our new house, without daddy. How happy we'll be. I make sure they understand why I am leaving. They all know it's because daddy isn't nice to mummy. The youngest 2 dc's are 4 and 5 and they dislike him intensely anyway. They call him a bad man and don't like to be in his company. The 4 year old won't talk to him at all.