The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Giving Up Booze For Lent.

[Mouseface]

Hello.

I'm Mouse.

We are a Bus load of posters with various relationships with the demon booze. Some are sober, some are not and some are inbetween.

So come say hi and meet the rest of The Babes, there's always plenty of room on the Bus, the doors are ALWAYS open.

No judgy pants are worn on this journey, pants yes and even the odd Tena Lady but always of the non judging variety.

Previous Threads

Thanks everyone that has responded. I am listening to you all and it feels so comforting. I am going to stay on the bus, I do want to tackle the urge to drink and stop giving in so easily to temptation. I gave up smoking and other substances so this is my last vice but it's going to be so hard because it feels like then I'll have nothing.

Nope Thorn - you will have the real you back - you are not losing anything, just finding yourself again xxxx

I've spent a lot of time hiding not convinced I'll like what I find

I fear I'm coming across as a bit self centred and whingy. I'm just on a bit of a stream of consciousness and things are just sort of pouring out. I don't expect anyone to feel sorry for me I'm just loving getting it off my chest.

I've often felt a bit self centred on this thread thornrose, especially when I first started posting on it (and I've only been here regularly for a fortnight! - although I've posted here before under other names) I think I needed to organise my thoughts and did that by posting about my decision to stop drinking and it really helped, so try not to feel guilty about posting about yourself too much. You'll find a path that works for you by talking.

thorn, if you think you sound self-centred and whingy you should see my first posts ... and the last ones ... and most of the ones in the middle!

If people on here mind they've been very good at not showing it!

I find it really helpful to find other people who're going through the same thing, I think that's why these threads are so important to everyone. It's not as if we've got much chance of a light chat about alcoholic habits in RL!

If you're up for stopping, something that's nice on here, imo, is that whatever strange feelings or cravings or physical withdrawal symptoms you have, someone else will be saying 'oh, yes, me too!' and will tell you when it stopped for them, or what they did about it - really good practical stuff like that, which is hard to beat.

Thanks for that, it's helpful, I'm worried I'll turn people off because I have nothing to give.

Threads like this work because of people like you all (y'all!!) supporting and talking and sharing. I feel like a leech.

Well, they've not minded me for that reason yet.

Besides which, I hope this is ok to say, but your posts do have something to give. It does help me to see you saying you're there, and you're hiding bottles and drinking - it reminds me exactly what I did and how close I am to all of it. I've only been not drinking for a short while, and have had a lot of false starts, so for me the scary thing is trying to keep myself alert. I have to work hard to remember it's not all ok now, and just because I haven't had a drink for 7 weeks, doesn't mean I can relax, start again and be a 'normal' drinker.

When I read your post it made me think 'who am I kidding? This is still exactly how I want to drink.' So I know I am still an alcoholic and always will be.

Does that make sense?

Oh that makes complete sense Little thank you so much, how articulate you are, thanks again.

For articulate read blabbermouth!

But glad it made some sense. I'm off to bed now, but hope to see you on the thread again.

Night night.

Hey rose, no threads like this work, because everyone contributes,

your stream of conciousness has helped me tonight, mine might help someone else tomorrow. we are all trying to help ourselves, for some reason we are all managing to help other people at the same time. It's simple and suprisingly effective.

I was speaking to a long time sober friend, and he said that helping other people with drink problems really helped him, and he has been sober for 20 odd years.

Sleep well, keep posting and just remember - we are all in it together, whatever you have done, one of us will have done it too.

I was also a bottle / glass hider, in my own home, that I paid for - totally ridiculous but I did it. I feel so free not having to do it anymore.

All of a sudden I am me, the me I want to be - not the me that alcohol made me.

Night night all

LRD totally articulated what I was trying to say, so much more eloquently than me!!

Your posts tonight reminded me of me 4 months ago, keep strong, you can do this if you really really want to!

Unexpected turn of events, dd's sleepover friend decided she needed to go home and got very upset (first time sleepover for her) because I'd had a drink I couldn't drive her home and her dad had to come and get her.
My drinking is starting to impact on "normal" family life and I need to accept that. My dd is now in my bed upset and all I can think about is will she notice I'm drinking wine if its in a tumbler or do I need to wait until she's asleep.

Good morning - busy day ahead here, visit to 'the flat' to (hopefully) meet tradesmen and get an estimate for some of the work, 1hr phone call with my supervisor, lunch (and a good old gossip) with my friend, back home to receive my mothers day card from dd1, then into town to collect another friend from the station - she's coming to stay for a couple of nights. And I'm someone who likes a lot of my own space and time - so not an ideal mother's day for me. Ah well at least the sun is out and it's a bright spring day.

It's interesting going for lunch with my friend. She and I are long term drinking buddies, and over the last months I've been engineering our times together so that I would have the car and have to drive, and there were a couple of times last year when I just made myself unavailable. I felt so guilty about not drinking, as though I was letting her down somehow and spoiling her fun / our friendship. A part of me felt that even my friends only liked me because I was a big drinker, and I was too scared to tell her outright what was going on. Anyway we spoke on the phone last week and she just said 'oh when we go out next week, I'll not be drinking, so we could go to xx (a place out of town)'. As easy as that. So why was I squirming about going out with her and not drinking. And honestly, I know that there's still a little bit of me that doesn't want to tell other people that I'm an alcoholic, because then if I ever DO want a drink, they might try and stop me. How crap is that?

It felt good to be around with everyone on here last night

thornrose I hope you're doing OK this morning, come back and post on here whenever you feel like it, and don't worry about being self-centred - we all are - I'm posting on here because it helps ME.

Morning all

Thornrose hi, and just to second what LRD said. I'm a very, very newbie and still right at the start of things - it's literally only a few days since I last hid a bottle at the bottom of the dirty dishcloth bag, and I'm very much taking things one day at a time right now.

How are you this morning? That's a horrible thing to have happened last night - I'm very good at rationalising that my drinking doesn't have that much of an impact on others, but something like that is kind of undeniable, isn't it, and obviously struck home.

I'm hopeless at words of wisdom, I'm trying to think what might help me to hear in your shoes, so apologies if it comes out wrong. Today is another day. Having a drink today won't make yesterday go away, and won't make you feel better about it in the long run, either.

I know it's probably too late to change your plans with it being Mother's Day and all, but is there any chance you could do something that doesn't involve going for/having proper "sit down" meal to take away the opportunity of having that first glass of wine?

Be gentle on yourself, but remember that you do have a choice to do things differently today. I'm hopeless for drinking more when I feel guilty about having had a drink so I'm definitely not preaching what I practise [shame].

Whatever you do, keep posting here, you're not boring anyone or letting anyone down.

Morning venus - hope you have a lovely day with your friend, that's a nice thing to do.

Thank you for posting that last little bit - it's good to know that even grown-ups feel like that too

morning all and happy Mother's day. I got a lovely card, flowers and book from Ds (on behalf of them all) and a grope from DH
thornrose how are you today?
Back to day 1 for me here and I am going to try not to drink - will you join me? Tough today becase DH is on a late shift and I enjoy having the evening to myself..and drinking a "nice" bottleglass of wine.
have to go and visit dad today and see how he is....a care home beckons for him but he is resisting all efforts.
Hope you all have a nice day.
mouse just to let you know that via another thread I paid it forward

Happy Mother's day all, I hope your wife has a lovely day Miflaw, and Happy Sunday to all non-mums.
Very busy yesterday, so couldn't post, ripping up carpets, going to the tip, all glamorous stuff!

Thorn I hope you are ok this morning. Welcome, and please do post if you feel like it. I can't count the times (all the time?) that my posts are all me, me, me, but no-one seems to mind .

We are going up to DH's mum's grave this morning to give her some flowers, and then my parents are coming for lunch.

Have already been in tears, at the lovely card DC1 sent me from uni. Can't believe that he is so grown up, that he writes like he does.

Ma we have just got a new bed that is nearly 7ft wide, helps for a quick getaway .

Have a lovely day, all.
xxxxxx

Can I come back :(

I'm too new to know your "history" but I can listen if it will help??

Hi qo, how are things going?

Morning thornrose good to see you back again. Have a nice mother's day. Sounded from your post yesterday as though you have plans for lunch? Can I recommend that the FIRST drink you have when someone offers you something is a soft drink. Whatever else you decide to do or to drink after that, it feels kind of powerful to purposefully decide that at least the first drink will be non-alcoholic. It does a number of other things too - hydrates your body, makes you feel like you have a choice, delays you taking your first drink, and starts to normalise (for you and for others around you) that it is OK to have a lime & soda / orange & lemonade / coke / water / whatever.

Thanks, I'm a bit regretful that I was so honest last night and revealed things I wouldn't have sober but hey ho!
I will certainly try that venus thanks for the tip.

hi venus, I'm back on the bus and I want to stay on it this time, if you'll have me back.

monumentally fucked up yesterday, so now feeling like shit with the worst hangover and the feeling of being the worst mother in the world.

I've just promised the little one there wont be any more drinking in the house and she said thank you.
I have to try and stay focussed on what this is doing to her, I love her so much more than anything in the world, but I keep putting her at risk :(

Now I have to go down and see my mother with papershop card and gas station flowers as I was too interested in pissing it up than actually shopping for anything for her.

I feel so awful :(