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Original poster

The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Giving Up Booze For Lent.

1000 replies

Mouseface · 25/03/2011 21:01

Hello.

I'm Mouse. Smile

We are a Bus load of posters with various relationships with the demon booze. Some are sober, some are not and some are inbetween.

So come say hi and meet the rest of The Babes, there's always plenty of room on the Bus, the doors are ALWAYS open.

No judgy pants are worn on this journey, pants yes and even the odd Tena Lady but always of the non judging variety. Grin

Previous Threads

OP posts:
algee · 02/04/2011 17:43

family heading back in, so i'm going to run...have a lovely weekend all. thanks a million for being here.

dementedma · 02/04/2011 20:11

hi all
indie where are you?
have you all had good days? Done a load of housework and laundry so I can "relax" and be pampered tomorrow on Mothers Day. yeah, right!

venusandmars · 02/04/2011 20:52

ma here's hoping you don't get a 'special' morning present Hmm.

I am going for 'mother's day' lunch with my friend who can't have children. She often feels very excluded on days like that, so we're off for a long natter uninterupted by husbands or children.

bafanatheSober · 02/04/2011 21:02

evening all

good day here Grin
have done bugger all Grin Grin, even had a couple of hour siesta this afternoon.

Just had a house blitz and everything is looking nice and tidy!

Bloody FIL is drunk again, but that is his problem - not mine unfortunately for him Sad, but I am not letting it get me down.

DD is baking me a Mother's day cake, and DS and I are watching Vampire Diaries. It;s so nice to able to appreciate the little things in life

Safe night all
Love
Bafana

thornrose · 02/04/2011 21:42

I have read every post on this thread and I have decided to add my own. I really want a drink as I do EVERY night. In order to get a drink tonight I have to borrow some money from my mum who is sleeping at the moment as I have no cash in the house. I am willing her to wake up. I am 45 yo mother, not a teenager by the way!!!
If I get the money I will then go to the shop and buy wine (I will pretend to be buying milk). I will drink it in secret in my bedroom as my dd is having a sleepover and I don't want my mum to know I'm drinking. Every time I hear anyone I'll hide the glass under the bed, the wine bottle will be in the wardrobe!! I will drink the whole bottle as usual.
Or I could get my pyjamas on and get in bed now and NOT have a drink, but I really, really want one. I don't think I really want to be talked out of it either if that makes sense.

dementedma · 02/04/2011 21:56

oh, thornrose, I understand the not wanting to be talked out of it!!
Can you just go to bed now? That's it.
Grit your teeth, bite the pillow, tomorrow is another day.
So glad you posted, please don't wake your mum up. Stay on here and talk, or go to bed.

venusandmars · 02/04/2011 22:06

hi thornrose, yes I too at age 49 would hide a glass behind the sofa when someone was coming into the room, or hide a bottle and glass in the cleaning cupboard in the kitchen. It's not really a good feeling is it?

Is there anything you can do to distract you? I understand how much you want a drink, and that you don't want to be distracted, but you know, you could always wait until tomorrow, and see how that goes.

GollyHolightly · 02/04/2011 22:10

Thornrose - cheesecake helps, do you have any Grin

Seriously though, anything sweet might be enough to put you off just long enough to be tired enough to get to bed.

I was a bottle hider too. I blamed that on my husband, if only he wouldn't judge me for drinking! It wasn't long before the hidden wine became hidden vodka because it was smaller (easier to hide) and easier to disguise the smell. Anyway, I'm only saying this so you know that I know how it feels to be hiding it.

thornrose · 02/04/2011 22:10

So I went for the wine and I am in bed with it so to speak. Realistically I will have a drink with lunch tomorrow as it's Mothers Day, if I drink at lunch I will not want to stop. I want to try very hard not to drink on Monday.
The week before last I didn't drink from Monday to Friday then went for it at the weekend. On the Monday I drank and then felt like I might as well drink for the rest of the week and start again on a Monday!!!
I know I appear to be talking to myself but it's helping, sorry if I'm coming across as a bit mad!

JaneS · 02/04/2011 22:13

Yes, another one here who knows about the hiding bottles. It's grim.

It's a cliche, but sometimes it really is good just to get to the point where you can talk about it and admit it's all going a bit pear-shaped, even if you just want to comment on here. Hope it helps.

thornrose · 02/04/2011 22:15

Oh god, thanks for responses, I thought everyone had gone offline for the night. Other "grown women" hide bottles too...? Wow.
Ok now I'm crying which is a bit scary and unexpected. Not to mention bloody inconvenient.

dementedma · 02/04/2011 22:19

thornrose if you went from Monday to Friday without drinking then you are doing a hell of a lot better than I am.
I think I have only ever done that twice in the last 10 years. So well done for that and it proves you can do it. As can I when i really want to - . But not tonight.
I've never hidden bottles, but itmakes no difference. I drink too much as do all of us on here. Keep talking to us. We don't have all the answers but we have some Smile

venusandmars · 02/04/2011 22:22

If you've never shared this with anyone before, it can feel a bit overwhelming to suddenly have a bunch of people who understand - even if we are all anonymous people on the internet....

But you'll find that we DO understand - the need that you feel, the despair that you feel, the confusion.

Post whatever you like, whatever makes you feel better.

thornrose · 02/04/2011 22:22

I'm a bit scared. I think I have to say I have a problem but I don't want to cos then it will get really.. real! I've known for ages. I'm scared I'm really damaging my health and my daughter lost her dad last year, she can't lose me as well.

Silver66 · 02/04/2011 22:24

Ma big ((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))

Thorn - best advice I can give you is stay on the bus. Hang in here, read as much as you can and post as much as you can.

You will find the help you need on here Smile xxxxxxxxxxx

thornrose · 02/04/2011 22:24

I'm not a bit scared, I'm terrified..

GollyHolightly · 02/04/2011 22:28

You know, you really don't have to say anything to anyone about having a problem. Probably the best thing you could do for yourself at the moment is to listen (read) and reach your own conclusions. Obviously I'm not suggesting that you shouldn't join in, I think what I'm trying to say is that you shouldn't feel pressured to do anything that doesn't feel right, and if any kind of admission doesn't feel right tonight then it probably isn't.

You're absolutely not alone though. There are loads of us out there, some posting and I'd put money on there being at least as many more who are lurking and considering their own options.

JaneS · 02/04/2011 22:29

Oh, thorn, it sounds as if you've been having a rotten time. Sad

This thread is really great, they have helped me loads. Stick with it.

You're right about your health - good motivation to stop! Smile

dementedma · 02/04/2011 22:35

thornrose we all know that fear, denial, guilt, shame cycle.
When i found this thread I was so gobsmacked that there were other women out there like me, that I couldn't take it in at first. it made me feel that I wasn't alone. Some posters are very gentle, some are harder hitting but they have ALL been there, done it, got the scars.
i still don't have control over my drinking - I am drinking tonight - but I am so much more aware of it, accepting that I have a drink problem, and best of all, i am trying. That's all any of us are doing. Some are more succesful than others but we all try - to cut down, to reduce, to stop - whatever is right at the time.
However shite you feel now, posting on here tonight is the best thing you could have done.
tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life
we're here.

venusandmars · 02/04/2011 22:37

thornrose I totally get what you are saying about your daughter, but also you have to do this for YOU. Yes, if you carry on drinking you will damage your health, but it is so much more than the state of your liver or your blood pressure. The mental and emotional stuff of the type you've described tonight, the slow destruction of your life and your friendships - You deserve all of those things to be turned around. Take it at the pace that is right for you. You did well to manage several days without a drink, when you're ready you can try another day.

venusandmars · 02/04/2011 22:38

Hi silver Grin

JWIM · 02/04/2011 22:38

Thorn another bottle/glass hider here too in my time - 48 and a parent too. It is scary to say/write out loud what you are worried about, may have been worrying about silently/in your head for an age.

Tomorrow is a new day. Tackle tomorrow when it comes. Post if it helps. There are are may ways to tackle the urge to drink - if you decide that is what you would like to try.

Silver66 · 02/04/2011 22:45

Hey Venus Grin xx

Silver66 · 02/04/2011 22:46

and Thorn - me too - hiding that is - just stay on the bus - talk - and you will be fine lovely xxxxx

dementedma · 02/04/2011 22:48

Thorn I have to go now, but pm me if you want and I'll get back to you tomorrow.
Sleep well and we'll talk again
You are safe here

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