The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Carry On Past The Park Bench!

[HammerMouseOfHorrors]

Hello

I'm Mouse and one of the Brave Babes on the Battle Bus.

The bus is never full and you'll find a real mix of people on board, all with the same goal.

To take control of their drinking. Whether that's to stop completely or cut right down.

Everyone is welcome to get on the bus at any point. You will receive a warm welcome and plenty of support.

Some come meet the others.........

The journey so far.

JWN's original thread

Thread two

Thread three

Thread four

Thread five

Thread six

Thread seven

Thread eight

Thread nine

Thread ten

Hi everyone
CJ I agree with what you are saying to some extent but everyone is at different stages. Did you stop, just like that, no trying and failing?

christi - i know its not a competition, and im really not saying this to be an arse, but, i really have given up, 'just like that' - oh, im not saying its easy by any means, the thing is, i REALLY want to stop!, i REALLY want to keep my family, i REALLY want my life back!, alcohol was taking everything!, what i used to do was try to stop in a very half-hearted way, i hadnt reached my rock bottom and still thought i was in control - that approach is not going to work for me anymore, it all went too far, when dh told me to stop or get out HE MEANT IT!! AND I KNEW IT!!, when it gets to that point you really do have a choice, so, i havent cheated, i havent buggered about, i havent lied, I JUST STOPPED!! and i can tell you now, if i hadnt, dh would have stuck to his threat and i would not be here now!

thats why i get frustrated with the 'stop start' approach, in other words

DO YOU REALLY WANT TO STOP OR ARE YOU GOING THROUGH THE MOTIONS?

Hi Christi. Yes, I pretty much did just stop. But I was lucky - I had several years of being friends with people who'd stopped (much to my horror) and could see that their lives weren't blighted by not having a drink, they were actually better. I also saw that they weren't weird, or in a cult, and hadn't 'found God'. It took me a long time to make the connection between booze and my stupid behaviour, but once I had done it was really clear that I had to STOP, not cut down. It had to be non-negotiable. For me, one-day-at-a-time doesn't work, because I could kid myself that, in that case, tomorrow I could drink. Someone said to me, try a period of three months - a good, solid block of time - and see how you feel at the end of it, better or worse. That block of time was enough for me to realise that life was infinitely better (and I was in the middle of a divorce, so reaching for the bottle would have been easy and, some would say, more than justified) and by then I was happy to leave the sauce behind.

Getting through one of the toughest times of my life without a drink probably made it easier to stay off it. I miss it sometimes - the idea of it, anyway, I certainly don't miss the hangovers or the shameful behaviour - but the thought of going back is as unthinkable now as, back then, was the thought of never having a drink again.

I went to a party recently and stayed quite happily till one in the morning. Had a fab time, danced and laughed and celebrated. And drove home, and woke up knackered the next morning. Watched people get progressively drunker, found some of them genuinely funny (good drunks) and some of them really annoying (boring drunks). I used to be both . People tried to get me to drink and some got shirty with me about it. Some of them probably thought I was boring or strange but I just wasn't bothered. It's my life, and I like it like this. It's real and it's happy (most of the time - giving up booze isn't like waving a magic wand, shit still happens) and I wake up knowing what I did the night before and I still fuck up a lot of the time but at least I have a clear head to deal with it, and I'm no longer stumbling in the dark, not knowing who I am or where I'm going.

Here endeth the lesson. God, I can go on sometimes .

PS And the sex is unbelievably better when you're sober. Honest.

I am not a happy bunny - friggin cravings all of a sudden ..

diabolik you know what they are, you know how to deal with them - swim, sauna, run, cookies, you know you they will pass and you know you will be happy to have a clear head in the morning.

diabolik 3 weeks is amazing - you can keep going!

Giving up without going back is what I did with smoking. I just really got so disgusted with myself for keeping smoking simply because I could that I decided one day and that was it. And.....that was it. I haven't looked back.

I wish I could realise why I am unable to do this with alcohol - I haven't yet (and hopefully won't) get to that point where DH says that's it enough or out, I'm thinking that controlling myself will stop that happening.

DH is being progressively better btw Mouse Venus and Christi and everyone else who had the "benefit" of my ramblings last week... no real flare ups so far this week so that's something

JWN and CJ Have to agree that just not drinking has been the easiest solution for me. I tried to live up to my promises (to myself and DH) - just a glass each night, to not get so drunk I had to be put to bed, feel free to add any number of promises - but I didn't keep those promises. In my case I was faced with the reality that my marriage and family were on the line and I had to do something. My rock bottom perhaps? It was a very deliberate decision to not drink at all, to not have the worry that I would have to try and control myself in the sure knowledge that I hadn't before so why would it be any different now. There are cravings, there are 'what if' moments, there are opportunities - no one will know. In the end I know and I have to take charge and the easiest way is just not to drink alcohol.
For those of you trying to get a grip - try not drinking for today and then try the same tactic tomorrow and stop trying to make deals with the drink - only the drink will win in that game.

Think I know what the problem is - Trying to quit smoking as well and am over reacting to stuff ...

Mrs Diabolik is not helping at all .. She just seems to be poring petrol on any fire :(

e.g dont ask for any help or understanding but vice versa I am to listen to any shit she got going on

why can't you ask for help or understanding diabolik has she imposed this rule?

Dont know whether its a rule or not . I just know that whenever I say anything there is no listening just a subject change.

Good afternoon everyone. I promise, for the love of cheese, to try and stop binging and then feeling guilty afterwards. Thanks Mouse :)

Usual hungover, tired demeanor today but just had a Big Mac (the only cure) and feel a whole lot better. Won't drink tonight, will wake up tomorrow feeling fresh as a daisy and say to myself I'm not having a drink today and try and summon up enough will-power to bloody stick with it.

Thanks for all the support last night and the variety of posts today. It's good to be here.

Sorry, I didn't mean to upset anybody I do want to stop but I'm at my first stages of trying to quit and I'm struggling with which is why I have my 'stop starts' I certainly didn't mean to depress anyone. I'm gonna back off this thread now and maybe come back when I've got myself past the first stage. A massive thank-you to everyone who has advised me.

loopylou No-one is upset. Please stay on the bus. We all know that it is a struggle. What is your motivation for not drinking?

loopylou i know how you feel. You didn't upset me at all because I know that I am a stop-starter, and I am at quite early stages too in 'starting' stopping.

loopy Do NOT leave this thread. We all need you as much as you need us.

Stay xx

ahhh!! ive lost a big old post to loopy!!

PLEASE STAY WITH US!!! WE NEED YOU!!!!

loopy, i have pm you!!

Just to say Loopy I'm the stop-start queen but I ain't going to give up trying to give up! You're in good company here but if it's your decision to have some time out, hope it goes well.

On another note, does anyone have experience of Naltrexone? I'd like to discuss it with my GP but don't know much about guidelines for its prescription.

Hiiiii Babes, Im backkkk

Thanks for your posts ladies, and your message Zombie

Im just off to get into my PJs, check in soon x

Hey Diabolikbeen running lately? How far do you run? Since I stopped drinking my running has really improved! I'm doing some of my best times, not bad for an old bird

phew!!, loopy!, dont do that to me!, im getting too old for it!! [hgrin]

off to watch poirot, back after i have cracked the case!

hi mp - been going regularly again since my 10 k on the 17th run a 6 week break. I run about 30 mins every time ( 2.5 miles ) Which leaves me a minute off my old mile pace. Will get better now I also given up the fags .. :)

mp - so how often do you go ? anything particular your training for ?

Hello!

Another quick flying through post ... I got internet back last night only to chop a bit of my thumb off ... back on but going to lose electricity tmrw ... its never ending.

Not drinking though. Day 5 or week 10 if you don't count the slip ups. But I should count them right?

Hey babes, I can see it has been a busy day on the bus and real food for thought. I know i can't do the cutting down, hell I've been trying to do that for years. I need to seize this moment - not necessarily rock bottom, maybe just a serendiptious (sp?) time, 2 people I know have stopped, and I have stumbled across this terrific support. Thanks Babes!
Went for a 'drink' with my mates this evening and stayed strong - I took along my own soft drink so didn't have to take pot luck and lust after the wine. Came back feeling good and able to get on with cooking dinner and baking for a treat tomorrow -result!