16 week abortion

[rockandhardplace123]

Posting here for traffic following my previous thread. Has anyone had an abortion at 16 weeks and not regretted it? And felt comfortable with their decision. I feel so helpless right now.

But she’s made her decision leave the woman alone as the other person said wisely it’s best she comes of this post and makes her own choice. She’s shaming and blaming her and not listening to what the woman has told her - she ignored what she said and instead started landing her pro baby opinions on her when the woman clearly hasn’t a notion about how difficult it is to deal with this decision with a man who’s mistreating her.

So having a different opinion is shaming. No it’s not. Don’t tell other women what they are allowed to say. She didn’t say anything offensive. If you think it’s offensive report it.

It isn’t an opinion it’s being a bully.

The lady said she’s made a decision she didn’t ask for anyone’s opinion that’s telling when next asked.

It is extremely offensive and maybe you don’t understand why.

1. Domestic violence especially emotional abuse results in a heightened state of confusion - brain fog and you lose touch with your own reality from continuous manipulation - gas lighting so it’s extremely difficult to make a logical decision and number 2) pregnancy causes brain fog from hormones - tiredness etc = therefore trying to make a clear decision is extremely difficult without medical support , supervision because this is in definition is the same symptoms of a brain injury.

Muddling someone’s thoughts and making opinions when someone has spent time trying to find peace to make a decision isn’t helpful.

It also puts a person who’s highly vulnerable under pressure which could cause result in a mental break down or even suicide.

@coffeetart She asked for alternative opinions by creating a thread and if there is brain fog as you say then it can help to see things from an objective person.

At no point have a bullied. I have laid out facts.

1. The OP is in a situation of abuse. That can change. How many threads are there encouraging the OP to leave and start a new life? Carefully and with consideration with that goal in mind but it happens.

2. The OP will have to face the abuser after she aborts. Who says that's not going to have pretty devastating consequences when he reacts to that?

3. In situations like this the abusive partner can be deemed unable to participate in the child's life.

4. At 16 weeks the baby is a baby. It's hard to face. I get that. Doesn't make it any less factual.

5. The OP had difficulty at 6 weeks. I just said that she might find it even more difficult at 16 weeks because she actually wants the child but feels locked in. That is not a good place to be mentally to do something as final as this.

But please carry on with the emotive language to close conversations down.

I’m not wasting my time on you Jingle jangle you seem like a determined hard liner , a pro lifer campaigner who jumps onto threads like these.

This is all irrelevant what you’ve pointed out about - you are missing the point the lady isn’t engaging in the thread anymore as she’s decided to disengage to make peace in making in her own decision and choice.

Accept that and leave the lady alone.

@coffeetart I have nothing but sympathy for the OP. I think she is stuck in an awful situation and I really hope she has some peace.

As for you, I am trying to see things from your perspective but I can't get my head that far up my arse.

You accuse me of being a bully but the only one who has used emotive language is you.

You take such umbrage at a different view so you just try and shout louder to get others to shut up.

You tell it like it is but can't accept anyone remarking on what you do or say.

A bully.

I think setting everything else aside for the moment, will you be safe OP? Is there any risk to you and your three DC when he finds out you’ve terminated?

I’m not commenting on your decision because you say you’ve decided, but this is an important point @Jinglejanglejangle raised. I hadn’t thought about it before. Do you have plans to get out before he finds out you’ve terminated? I’m assuming your current DC aren’t his?

I feel you will have a lot of regret it will be very difficult to go through

Is it surgical?

Imagine medical would be extremely tough but either would be emotionally very difficult

I absolutely have been in an abusive relationship and I actually had an early stage abortion to him. Like I say if you married this man it’s clearly not something new …

I’m sorry that happened to you but I’m surprised you went ahead when you think it’s not ok for me to euthanise a dog I can’t afford to pay the vet fees for

Any update

If you were booked for an abortion at 6 weeks and couldn't go through with it, I wonder how you think you'll do it at 16 weeks. I miscarried at 15 weeks and it was very different to when I miscarried at 9 weeks. Only you can decide if you'd manage with a baby or not, or if you'd want to manage or not. Don't leave it any later. The further along you get you harder it will be.

Hi all. So yes, I've decided to keep my baby. He's a boy. It's been a pretty stressful pregnancy, but baby is healthy and well. Thankyou

I hope you’re ok and you are getting all of the support that you need x

Oh gosh @rockandhardplace123, I wasn't expecting you to say that but congrats!

How is everything else going - will your ex (?) be involved or have you managed to disentangle from him now? How many weeks along are you?

None of us can ever say what was right or wrong for you, but many of us have been in a similar position to where you are now and things have worked out, even if they haven't always been easy. I found having a gorgeous wee bundle to focus on helped get me through the difficult days 💐

That is wonderful news. Congrats from the bottom of my heart x

Thankyou, it took a lot of getting my head around, however, I am getting excited now.

Yes, I think he will be involved. Which may be a good thing or not. I am 24 weeks.

We are not together though.