anyone else pregnant with loads of kids already?? feelin bit judged ngl

[Chattymum23]

hi all not sure if i should post this but here goes

i’m 8+4 with baby no.5 (all boys 😅) n tbh i feel like everyone thinks i’m a joke. haven’t even told half the fam cos i know what they’ll say. last time i told my mum i was preg she rolled her eyes n said “again?” 😔

i know it’s not ideal but it’s happened now n i just want to be happy bout it. i love my kids loads even if life’s a bit hectic

i’m knackered n got sickness bad but still doin school runs n sortin all the meals n tantrums. nursery called again yday bout my 4yo n i just cried in the loo after

anyone else got a biggish family n feel like ppl look down on you? not after a row just want to feel a bit less alone

I’m sorry you feel judged. It’s very easy not to have had five kids these days if you didn’t want that many, so I’m assuming you do. In which case, ignore the judges. Defo not my idea of fun, but each to their own.

Ever heard of sarcasm?

And thread police really fuck me off. Keep your controlling posts to yourself.

My cousin has just wrecked her body in her mid 40s having a fourth child in the hopes of a boy after 3 girls.

She’s shattered and has had a fourth girl and says she would not have had another baby if she knew it would be another girl.

This thread is not about you so get a grip.

Kids can't eat 'love and care' and nor does it put clothes on their backs, shoes on their feet, or heat the house.

You're being silly here, you know that love and care isn't all that matters.

Oh ok so just because your cousin done it that means everyone else does it for the same reason?!

😂 controlling post? What planet are you on?

Congratulations! I’m sorry to read some of the comments.. ignore the judgement. You sound amazing, pregnancy is tough and you are allowed to say, this is rubbish. I’m tired and sick and struggling.. your body is literally growing a human! It doesn’t mean you don’t want to be pregnant or shouldn’t have more kids, it means you need to try and simplify things as much as you can. Some ideas would be maybe batch cook on a Sunday for the week ahead so you can just bung stuff in the oven to heat up? Look at the planner and get all school stuff/activities organised well in advance, I used to make up a ‘bored box’ with stuff the kids enjoy and can do mostly independently and bring it out when I needed a break when pregnant. Also, a day in front of the tv now and then when you really need it, won’t do the kiddos any harm. Stop putting pressure on yourself to have things perfect, I hope the pregnancy goes smoothly, I have 3 boys and they are exhausting so hats off to you with 4 and another one growing ❤️

Good for you, that your life is on track, and going well, from the sound of it. Nobody knows what is happening in anybody else's life, or knows what they have had to overcome, from a couple of posts, and should not be so quick to judge. Not everybody is as sussed as you obviously🙄

And how much quality 1 on 1 time do you spend with each child? Do they have their own space, do they get to go to activities that they want to do? Is your house tidy or is it a tip?
I know a family with 5 children - both parents work and they are great. Others are a total disaster. Which are you.

Less money to go round for the whole family
Less time and attention from parent
Risk of conflict with the other stepdads as growing up
Risk of conflict between the mother and the stepdads
Obliged to help look after the young ones for the eldest
No stabilising male presence to role model

There are objective reasons to feel sorry for the kids

Dont bother me how many kids someone has i dont have to look after them.
As long as your happy with it good luck to you.
I've got judged more than once for saying my child's 22 and moved out.
And im 38.

Ok well I’m a mum of 5. All of my children have their needs met and have quality 1 one 1 time with me. I would never ask the older ones to look after the younger ones nor do I ever rely on my family or friends they are my children and I look after them.

I kind of get where your are coming from with the step dad comment. I’m not in that position but if anyone ever was then I truly hope the mum wouldn’t put the other children in a position they are not comfortable.

I presume you expect your eldest son to pick up the slack and look after his siblings,this impacting on his education.
Picking up younger siblings from school will prevent him from taking part in after school clubs and later revision sessions during term time and school holidays which will boost his success.
No space to complete any homework because he doesn't have a desk or any quiet time?
Oh! But he can do his homework AFTER the younger ones have gone to bed. You know,when he's knackered because he's been looking after them since he picked them up.
Cooking and cleaning for younger siblings whilst you work longer hours?
To right I'm judging you because I see the impact on young carers every day.
Just because we popped 4 plus kids out because of high infant mortality/ more workers for the factories/ mills/mines/ potbanks a century or more ago doesn't mean we need to now.
For fucks sake the revolution of contraception allowed us to take control of our reproduction not just so we could shag about but because it gave us the opportunity to decide when to start a family.
But ,yeah. Whoopsie. Here 'i ' go again!
I just hope the eldest gets a fair crack at his education and you aren't 'that' parent who relies on children to care for children because you can not because you need to.

No one said OP has done it for that reason. It was a question.

And yes, when you tell people what they can’t post, that is controlling.

Seriously, grow up, you sound about 12.

Congratulations.

Anything other than 2 seems to attract cristism - and that included none or 1 as well as more.

Best bet is to ignore it all - change subject or shrug at the comments.

So you're tax payer funded. It's no surprise that people who are paying for you and your children are judgemental.

She should be a bit careful about what she says, because that baby will grow up and will probably hear that her mother told all and sundry that if she had known she would be a girl she wouldn´t have had her. Imagine knowing your mum thought that? A closed mouth is a virtue in this case.

Don’t be , the birth rate is dropping we need more babies

Obviously feeding them is included in loving and caring for them ffs 🙄

How on earth do you pay for 4k soon to be 5 children on a part time cleaning wage that you do between school times?
You say dad doesn’t live with you? Is he abroad earning huge amounts of money to send back to look after all these children? Or does being classed as a ‘single parent’ mean you are entitled to more money?

I’m sorry OP, but people will judge you. And given your own family have judged you, I’m guessing that they see this as a less than ideal situation too.

What a random bunch of assumptions. I have 4 children, none are responsible for the others and having 3 siblings has absolutely no impact on their education. Absolutely nowhere did OP say she either currently relies on, or intends to rely on, her elder children for childcare. In fact what she did say is that her job is worked AROUND school hours.

Are you ok?

As long as your happy, your kids are took care of and happy and you can afford to look after them it’s no one else’s business is it. Do you OP xx

Congratulations 🥳

Ignore anyone who judges.