Pregnancy after loss part 2

[LER2023]

After the lovely Hopingrae had created such a wonderful thread.

I wanted to carry this on, as many more women need that added extra support.

Previous thread: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/pregnancy/5016264-pregnancy-after-loss-support?page=1

Hope everyone can find some support on this thread x

@Mamaxo I can sympathise with the heartburn - I feel sick with heartburn and indigestion all the time, I eat and I get 30 mins relief before feeling worse. It just continues to get worse all day. I'm so tired of it. To think I panicked when it disappeared for a few days last week... Lol.

@Hopefulrainbow sorry to hear about the spotting. I had some with my 2nd pregnancy... I ended up being bedbound for a few weeks with a threatened miscarriage. It was a horrible time. I hope you are able to put your feet up (hard with a toddler I know!) and relax as much as possible.

@OnNaturesCourse thank you - yeah it's been made worse but having horrific nausea, exhaustion and now also vomiting... And then people go "oh that's a good sign" but unfortunately not, I know symptom strength means nothing. I really hope the scan this week is conclusive so we can move on, the limbo is horrible.

My sister spoke to my dad and it sounds like he does know he needs to go to the doctor but the task is actually getting him to go. I don't blame him being afraid of what they might say/diagnose 😞

@moosey89 I know that well too, I threw up on the morning of my DD being born at 16 weeks (she had passed a week or so before) People mean well but honestly if they haven't been through this it's very hard to get "it right". I'm glad your Dad is open to help, and I completely get how he feels regarding making it all seem too real - that must be so scary.

@OnNaturesCourse I'm so sorry, it's horrible isn't it, knowing that the symptoms don't mean anything really. People mean well but they just don't understand.

And thank you - it's all pretty scary, especially since I "lost" my mum to mental health issues about 5 years ago, she's still alive but a shell of her former self, it's been super traumatic and hard not to have a mum for support either. I'm so lucky my partner's mum (and whole family) is just the most incredible lovely person who looks out for me like a daughter x

I've had a tough weekend. Sunday should have been my son's due date. I had a lovely day planned - we had gorgeous weather here. I wanted to be in nature so had an outdoorsy day. However, I was really really affected by the day. I am so thankful to be pregnant again with my daughter, but it was so incredibly tough emotionally.
I'm glad I did my day out, it was definitely good for my soul, however there were lots of tears over the course of the day.

@moosey89 I'm glad you have supportive in laws - that must be a real comfort but I know it never replaces Mum in any situation ❤️

@1yearplan due dates are hard, well done on getting through it your own way. We all manage differently and I think what you did sounds lovely and calming. Completely understandable that there were tears, emotions are high enough on days like that never mind throwing pregnancy hormones in as well.

Feeling very upset atm. Woke with cramps and bleeding EPU never bleeding answer - I have gone a little mad and called over 30 times.
If its another MC I wont be able to hack it. My last was in March just gone

7 weeks today and have my booking appointment later (I know it's early but didn't question the midwife when she called me to book in for today). I have been feeling nauseous and sooooo exhausted all weekend, it's been really tough but today my symptoms have gone, my breasts don't feel that tender anymore and I am freaking out. Also having some cramping which is scaring me. This did happen to me last week, and the symptoms did come back but I am not finding that reassuring at all. I started spotting with my MC last year at 8 weeks, and baby measured 9+2 when it had stopped growing... those looming milestones are causing a lot of anxiety for me. I also had a dream the other night that I miscarried this pregnancy, and have had a couple about giving birth. My head is all over the place atm😭

@DaringlyDizzy I am so sorry to hear that you are feeling upset. This is such a stressful time, especially with you having a MC so recently. I totally get how you feel about not being able to hack it if it's another one - I feel the same, it's mentally exhausting. I know all EPUs are probably different but I have to get a referral from my GP to go to the EPU, is this something you have tried? I know GPs are an absolute nightmare to get through to but I am pretty sure this would be classed an emergency extra appointment if your practice offers these? I know it is hard to believe this when you have already experienced loss, but it really might not mean another MC, bleeding in pregnancy can happen for so many reasons and I really hope it doesn't mean the worst for you. Sending lots of hugs💓

@DaringlyDizzy I'm so sorry you're going through this stress - I hope the EPU answer and are able to see you soon. Pregnancy after loss is no fun at all. All I can say is if it is another miscarriage (which isn't guaranteed) it'll be devastating but you will get through it eventually. I keep telling myself, I've made it through 100% of my hardest days and I will get through it again. It's emotionally draining for sure. Sending the biggest hugs xx

@DaringlyDizzy can you self refer/present at your EPU? I can't at my local one but the one a little further away I can... I used that in my first pregnancy when I couldn't get my local one on the phone.

@SunflowerDream hope all goes well today. I had my booking appointment last week over the phone, but need to go and get the bloods done next week. Can't say I'm happy about returning to the waiting room etc. I don't want to go, or be seen there etc. My symptoms all disappeared for a few days last week but they came back with a force at the weekend, barely been off the sofa or bed. I know we do but we shouldn't put much thought into what the extreme symptoms, or lack off, mean as ultimately it doesn't mean anything.

@OnNaturesCourse thank you - I am hoping she can take my blood there and then but I know I am quite difficult to take blood from and I am hoping my appointment is before their blood collection! My booking appointment with my pregnancy last year was at the hospital and this one is at a local clinic, so it's quite nice to have the change of scenery. I know you are so right, they really don't mean anything and everybody says their symptoms fluctuate and come and go. I guess when you have experienced loss, you just tend to automatically think the worst and read into every little thing - it's exhausting!

Has anyone else's bloating reduced quite a lot at 9ish weeks? I've been massive until this morn, 9+4.

I'm hoping it'll be the placenta or something but history of mc just puts me on edge with symptoms or lack of them 🤦‍♀️

@T2024 I have woke up today to a almost normal, flattish, soft tummy... I'm 9 weeks. Until today I've had a bloat as soon as I wake up then I've been looking 6 months pregnant by bedtime with a rock solid tummy.

Hi everyone.
Thank you for well wishes

I am already under the EPU due to multiple losses.
My reassurance scan is 7th June
I was calling today to get checked due to the bleeding - which has now stopped but the cramps are still there.
EPU refused to bring appointment back and said they dont see before 7 weeks which is a not true as I was under them (a GREAT team) in March/April for my ectopic and my first appt was when i was 5 weeks. Anyway I spoke to midwife team who did an internal call and EPU have now said they will see me tomorrow for bloods.

In other news my reoccurent miscarriage clinic appointment was pushed from May to October to November and today I had a letter saying it had been pushed again to late November.

I also had my GP appt today who said there was no way a GP could prescribe progesterone and it had to come from EPU. So will ask them about it tomorrow and have booked a follow up GP call for Wednesday incase EPU say go back to GP etc.

@DaringlyDizzy I know my progesterone came from EPU, with my next prescription coming from the GP (after EPU sent/gave them appropriate paperwork)

@OnNaturesCourse same, my stomach has been massive and rock hard at night and it completely deflated this morning. Lol I'm definitely overthinking all these symptoms.

@DaringlyDizzy GP wouldn't prescribe me progesterone, I had to go to a private gynecologist to get the prescription/guidance for gp to prescribe x

@DaringlyDizzy I’m sorry it sounds like you’re being messed around a bit, having clear guidelines and information is really important especially for people who have suffered loss before! Do you live in an area where you could switch to another hospital easily? I’d definitely look at that if you’re not happy with where you are. I hope you get some answers soon, I was prescribed my progesterone from EPU.

I hope your booking appointment went well @SunflowerDream, you’re right that this journey is exhausting!

Has anyone had perineum pain in pregnancy?

I only had it in my last, and quite badly, but in the past hour it's really flared up. It's over my old episiotomy scar, same as last pregnancy, and same as when I'm on my period.

Scaring the sh*t out of me. I had this with my last and a week later she was gone.

@Wise0wl my booking appointment went well thank you - my midwife is so so lovely, and it was much better and more informative than the one I had with my previous pregnancy. I'm just eager to get to the next appointment now but that isn't for 5 more weeks, time just feels like it is going so slowly😭

Doctors stress me out more than help. They've randomly texted me saying they want to start me on progesterone but I can't get an appointment till July and I'm 9 weeks already, so what the hell. Also at 9 weeks is it any point taking it anyway? So confused

@Mamaxo that’s so confusing!? Can you call them and ask for a prescription to be sent to your chemist? I know getting hold of them is almost impossible now. I have to fill in an online form, so long and so many irrelevant questions! I just end up typing ‘I wish I could speak to a person instead of writing the same thing 3 times’. Usually gets a quick response!
I’m so lost this week. Supposedly 11+3 but I’ve not had any sickness since it suddenly stopped two weeks ago. I have heartburn and need to pee a lot but those can be caused by hormones, I’m on progesterone and estrogen as it’s IVF. I’m suddenly petrified of having another scan and my NHS one isn’t until next Friday. My boobs also barely hurt now, I have to squeeze them to feel any soreness at all.
I hate this waiting and worrying, my friends seem to thing loss of symptoms is because I’m just progressing to the next stage and placenta is taking over but they’ve not had a loss so they don’t understand my worry.
sorry, rant over. I hope you’re all ok 💕

@Mamaxo they are so stressy, they may have it on prescription for you if they're wanting you to be on it? I'd ring up and check if so. I'm on progesterone until 16 weeks (all being well), so plenty of time for it x

@Zlcb I hear you, same here - v little symptoms since 8.5 weeks, almost feel normal, just slightly tired. Had a scan last Thursday, trying to hold off till I get my 12 week scan (haven't got a date in yet).

@T2024 thank you I'm going to phone them tomorrow and see what they say. Annoyingly they've known I'm pregnant for over 4 weeks :/ @Zlcb I'm exactly the same with symptoms mine stopped about 4 days ago and I'm 9+1 hoping everything's okay, I have a private scan Saturday so fingers crossed x

I am SO happy right now!
EPU saw me this morning and called with blood results 880!!
So at a good strong level. SO freaking happy. I go back in Thursday and then will have my scan bought back if levels have doubled