Pregnancy after loss part 2

[LER2023]

After the lovely Hopingrae had created such a wonderful thread.

I wanted to carry this on, as many more women need that added extra support.

Previous thread: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/pregnancy/5016264-pregnancy-after-loss-support?page=1

Hope everyone can find some support on this thread x

@Hopingrae little Jack. How bloody lovely is that. I really am so incredibly happy for you.

I’ve started bleeding this afternoon so I’m pretty confident that this was a chemical. How fucking shit!!! The way I’m feeling right now is that this is the end of the line for me. I can’t keep hurting myself like this and delaying life for the “just in case”. Losses at 16 weeks, 12 weeks and now a chemical and although physically each one has been easier than the last, emotionally every one has been harder than the last. I feel utterly broken. I had had the mc clinic where they told me everything had been reported as fine, they have flipped me onto the fertility clinic (I think they have done this because I am staff there) so that they have the ability to do more investigations, but I had said from the beginning my body had been through too much at 38 to put it through ivf on top, and although I’m broken I still know that is the right decision for me.

I only saw this now. Thinking of you. It's so hard. Reach out if you need to vent xx

Congrats @Hopingrae xxx

I'm nearly 16 weeks after a horrific year. Lost my twin boys at 30 weeks this coming week, last year. One angel born sleeping , my other passed away at 4 days old in the neonatal unit.

I've a posterior placenta this time. No movement yet and I'm so afraid this time around. Scared when I get movement as it means this is real and obvious the no movement last time alerted me to a problem and then I'm just terrified.. terrified that this will all be taken away from me again. I was 5 weeks away from planned section last time and before my sons I had to mc. So this pregnancy number 4 in 2 years but baby number 5. It's so hard. I kind of want movement and then I don't.

Bloody period has come and hit me like a ton of bloody bricks.
Its so heavy and so painful. Ive always said o hate the first 2 days, and the first day was a sunday and it was just like spotting and its monday day... im at work and its heavy as fuck😪
Its bloody painful too.. me and my OH spoke last night and said we will get this holiday out of the way (in april) and then maybe go to new york and then look at adoption because nothing seems to be happening and the mc clinic are making me wait even longer for them and im grtting inpatient and im 30 soon so not to happy since i said i wanted my first at 25 lmao

@Nic2908 - this was me this time last year - 4 miscarriages in 2 years and I was done cutting out everything... so we spent the money we would have spent on ivf on a 2 month trip round the world with our daughter. I would highly recommend taking a break and taking the pressure off.

Making a part 3 for everyone who wants to stay on this thread i'll post the link as im aware we've hit page 40!!

Part 3 for all those who want to join!https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/pregnancy/5202885-pregnancy-after-loss-part-3

Thank you to all those for sharing their experience and all those who have now had their babies and are still sharing with us to help us through our losses, we really do appreciate it and i hope to see you on the next thread🩷🩵

Is this thread still active? I've hsd 8 losses, ive also got 3 healthy children, my recent loss was 8 months ago ive recently found out that im pregnant again I found at 9/10dpo im currently 4wks 2 days now and i cannot shift the feeling that somethings going to go horribly wrong, like every ache twinge tug I feel in my back hips and stomach my heart sinks and then a panic attack sets in, its currently 01:07am and ive had 3 panic attacks already, my partner is asleep children are asleep and friends are asleep and jm awake alone so my head is genuinely doing over time thinking about all the worst case scenarios how can I possibly ease the stress and worry? Im sooo tired but yet my head won't let me switch off and sleep, its knocking me sick, I still have sore boob's extreme fatigue and constantly needing to wee and ive no more pregnancy tests to take to see if the lines are getting darker, I have took a few lh strips though and have had dye steelers on them but I know they are not reliable or accurate, this is honestly the 1st time ive ever properly freaked out over this to the point ive had several panic attacks, someone plesse tell me im not alone thank you for reading, this crazy mama just needs some advice and someone to speak to xxx

@harls1998 I'm sorry I didn't see this through the night!
First of all congratulations.
I think everyone who used this thread knows exactly how you feel. It's a horribly anxious time. I had 1 child. 2 losses. And now my 2nd child. I could not bring myself to believe that my second child was going to arrive safely throughout the whole pregnancy. Even once born it took me a while to sink in!
If you've had 3 children you know that your body can do this.
It's trite but true to say each pregnancy is different. So admittedly, do as I say not as I do, but just try and take it a day at a time and be grateful and celebrate each day closer you get to holding that little one in your arms.
Panic attacks sound extremely tough- especially in the middle of the night. If you were my friend though I wouldn't mind you calling any time if you needed some help grounding yourself. Could you look up and practise some mindful exercises during the day that you could try and use to ward off any future attacks?
I wish you so much luck and all the best for this pregnancy. Xxx