Pregant after miscarriage - support thread

[Nervousbuthopeful]

Hi everyone,

I'm new to posting on mumsnet, but have spent plenty of time reading through others' conversations for reassurance when anxious, and this seems like such a friendly place!

I've just found out I'm pregnant again after the miscarriage of my first at 11 weeks in August. I would love to connect with other people in a similar situation.

I'm feeling relatively ok, i.e. not totally panicked all the time, about this one, but I know it's going to be hard. I really find it hard to believe sometimes that this could work out.

Please send a comment if you're in a similar situation and would like to share/receive some support!

@ChloeN Congrats 😃 I had a MMC in August at 7 weeks. Been trying to stay positive but then I get waves of 'what if something's wrong, what if something happens' etc. It's so hard in the early stages isn't it 😫 no bump or kicks or anything for reassurance.

I haven't had any brown discharge etc this time like I did in the last pregnancy, so that's reassuring, but I also had nausea and tiredness up until a week or so ago and it's just stopped altogether so that's worrying 😫

I'll get an early scan from the EPU in around two and a half weeks time so I'm just praying everything will be okay and trying to stay positive until then 😫

@rach971 thanks lovely, mmc are hard aren’t they😔 I had absolutely no bleeding or any indication anything was wrong except this weird gut feeling that it wasn’t going to be okay, which is really odd tbh I never believed it when people said they knew!

I haven’t had any bad thoughts this time so I’m hoping this one will all be okay 🤞🏻

Yeah it's weird that we can just know, I had that same feeling when I went to get checked out last time 😓 Let's just hope second time lucky here! 🙏

Has anyone been to the early scans at 6 weeks? I want to book one to put my mind at ease but I don't want to panic more if it's too early to see a heartbeat or something 😱

@Beapo odd isnt it, I was obviously so upset but not even shocked when they told me!
I waited until 8 weeks last time to get a definite answer, like you I’d panic at 6 weeks if there was no heartbeat yet

@ChloeN Yeah same here, was still gutted obviously but not surprised, I just knew something wasn't right. I'm 5+6 at the moment so nearly 6 weeks and that's the earliest this clinic will do scans, so might wait til a weeks time when I'm nearly 7 and then see, and hope it's not too early! 🤞

@Beapo yes I’d try wait that extra week just for peace of mind! I’m totally undecided about having an early scan this time I’m just going to see how I feel over the next few weeks!

@ChloeN I think because last time I was having regular scans and blood tests at the hospital early on as my hcg wasn't quite right initially, and this time round I'm not even able to contact the midwifes til I'm at least 8 weeks, just makes me feel nervous 😱 I'm not able to work at the moment so just trying to keep myself busy so my mind is occupied and hope time goes quicker 🤣 started back up on the blanket again that I started knitting last time round 🥰

@Beapo, I had an early scan with my son at 6+2 and around 6+1 with this baby (but measured closer to 5 weeks). On both occasions, I could see a heartbeat! 💗 However, they do say that it's not always visible at 6 weeks but should be by week 7, so might be better to hold off, if you can. Are you sure of dates? That might also be a factor if you aren't as far along as you first thought, which, again, might cause anxiety.

If it helps, I had another when I was 9 weeks (only measured 8) and that was really nice because you could see baby moving and little limbs starting to develop. 😍 Baby even had hiccups at the time and I was in awe at how much could be seen when baby was so tiny!

@B1993 Ah that's lovely to hear 🥰 I think I'm pretty sure on my dates, I was doing ovulation tests and bbt nearly everyday and I did a test the day before my period was due, was negative then 2 days later was positive so I should be 5+6 according to my app 😊 Will probably go next Friday evening with my partner, he never got to see any scans last time as it was during covid in hospital 😓 should be 6+6 by then so fingers crossed!

@Beapo it’s such a long time between finding out your pregnant and then the first appt isn’t it🤦🏻‍♀️ I’m quite glad it’s Christmas so I’ll be really busy and not sit obsessing over it 🤣

@B1993 i thought I recognised your name, it’s from the mc support chat isn’t it??☺️xx

@ChloeN Yeah it certainly does drag! Doesn't help I'm super impatient anyways 😅

@ChloeN, yes! It's great to see you here on a pregancy board, hopefully some of the other ladies from MC support join soon 🤞🏻🤞🏻

It sounds so stupid as I write this, but just come across the Due April '23 thread which says they're half way through their pregnancies. That's the board I was on with my miscarriage and, while I'm so happy to pregnant and for things be going well, it's just a reminder of my 'what could have been?' baby. Not sure if that makes sense but the reminder has taken me back a bit.

I'm still counting my blessings though and happy to be here with a new pregancy and baby so trying to stay focused on that 🥰

@B1993 yes I think there was a few others who found out at similar times too! I saw the March 23 board earlier, I can’t bring myself to look but yes I remember feeling so so excited to join when I first found out🥹 I’m due the same date just 5 months later with this baby but like you I feel so blessed and grateful to be pregnant again!

Hi all. I am currently 6wks 2 (+ a few days more potentially). Pregnancy following a missed miscarriage at 8wks end of Aug/early September. Nice to see some familiar names 😊. @B1993 know exactly how you feel I was due April 2023 too. My SIL who was due the same week has just had her 20wk scan and found out the baby's sex and it made me think I should be at that stage! Feel so grateful to have another chance though. Good luck everyone such an anxious time xx

@tulipsunday ahh hey was just thinking of you!!xx

@tulipsunday, glad to see you here! It's so strange as you said - I should be having my 20 week scan soon and I've only just had my 12 week one. I suppose it's hard not to think about the 'what ifs?' during these milestones but staying focused on the postives is all we can do, I suppose. Must be hard having someone so close to you as a constant reminder though!

Aww, that's lovely that both due dates are the same day, @ChloeN! There's a lady on the Due June thread who is due the exact same date with this baby exactly a year after her MC. She said it's like a sign from the baby she lost, which I thought was lovely!

@B1993 I feel like that a bit too, all my dates are the same this cycle like ovulation and af date as the first one, where it hasn’t been like that since the mc so it just felt right!

That's lovely the date in the month is the same. I'm currently due around my wedding anniversary in July not sure if would want the same date or not! My son was two weeks late though so if this follows suit may be nearer August 😂

@ChloeN, I'm not normal superstitious but it sounds like the starts were aligned for this baby🥰

My DS is a July baby and this baby is June, @tulipsunday! ☀️☀️ It's a lovely time of year for a birthday!

DS came 5 days before his due date and the whole thing was quite quick so hoping not to go overdue this time around. My new dates put me earlier than expected at 3rd June whereas, if I calculate from ovulation, it'd be 7th so who knows when they'll make their entrance! 😅

June will be lovely for a birthday @B1993 reassuring to be measuring ahead now. Hope that will be the case when we go for an early scan two weeks tomorrow. So nervous already 😬

@tulipsunday im very start of august so we might be nearly the same!!☺️

@B1993 doesn’t it, me either but I feel like it really was meant to be❤️

@ChloeN Omg I was exactly the same! I knew from the get go it wouldn't end well for some reason. Kept telling myself I was being daft, but I just knew. I did have brown discharge for a week and a half though so that didn't help. How far along were you?

Hopefully we'll all get our rainbow babies ☺️🌈 Just can't wait for these next few weeks to hurry up!

@rach971 me too, you just try and convince yourself it’s normal worry and not to be silly but i really think I knew! I found out at 8w3d at the early scan, baby has stopped growing just after 7! I remember waking up one morning at 7 weeks thinking I wasn’t pregnant anymore, I then couldn’t shake that feeling

@rach971 sorry meant to add on the end, how far along were you? Xx

@ChloeN It's mad how we just know isn't it. I definitely feel more positive this time though but that worry is still there. I found out at 7+5, and baby had stopped growing at bang on 7 weeks. EPU said they'll give me an early reassurance scan at 7 weeks, so they told me if I phone them when I'm 7 weeks, they'll get me booked in. I'm currently 5+2 by my dates.