The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #2 "The Penguin Huddle " 🐧🐧🐧

[InDreamland]

Hello Ladies

Starting a new penguin huddle thread as the first one is getting very full. This is for those of us who've graduated from the conception boards.

Getting a BFP after pregnancy loss is not necessarily a happy time so this is a safe place to vent, worry and share news (good, hopefully, or bad).

I hope you are all here for the long-haul. But you are welcome no matter how briefly.
Others who are pregnant after loss but who weren't on the original thread are of course welcome too.

Let's start the roll call:

Me:
No living children, 3rd pregnancy, currently 8+3. Had early scan at 7 weeks that showed baby measuring right for 7w with a heartbeat. Got another early viability scan booked in for this Tuesday at 8+6. Really scared I've lost this one again.
2 previous pregnancies ended in mmc at 12+3 (baby stopped growing at 5 weeks) in July 2018 and mc (CP but hate that term) in November 2018. Before then had been TTC for 5 years so our journey has been 6 years since starting to TTC.

@KnitKitty @Yukka @rubyroot @Bluebelltulip @MyHeartisBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue @Amanda81 @boboelephant @Newbie21

Who have I missed?

@Catconfusion that's a big coincidence. I was due to have it done just before six week scan but put it off. I keep sucking on my tooth and it hurts when I suck. I took antibiotics for my absess literally when I had just conceived and then booked appt for root canal.
I even worried about all the pain killers and the antibiotics I had taken. But I guess it was so early than it wouldn't have done anything.
I went to dentist and they seemed more concerned about the x rays than the anaesthetic. She said the anaesthetic was very very safe. Said that if the pain started to get bad again then to get an urgent appt to kick start the root canal so they'll basically dig out the infection, dress it and wait to do the rest and it would require a small amount of local anaesthetic.

I'm surprised your dentist seems a lot more cautious than mine. Do let me know how yours goes.
I really don't know what to do, today I was on the verge of ringing and making an appt for early next week and saying just get it kickstarted as I can feel the sensitivity getting slowly worse but no toothache yet.

@Catconfusion some midwives are lovely, but I reckon fir every 3 great ones, there's one bitchy matronly one. I haven't had anything tobdo with midwives yet as not having booking appt yet and gone through GP for early scans and epau have dealt with them. I think I will possibly be high risk this time around and possibly be consultant led, but I think you still see midwives don't you?!
Can you change midwives or go to a different midwife centre? Ours hang out in children's centre here and I went to a great one which was on my way back from work. If I make it to ten weeks, I'm going to try and get in there again. X

@Navy123 really pleased you had a positive scan today 💜

Best wishes for tomorrow @sadtoday21 xx

I've not caught up on everything, am so tired 😴 hope everyone is OK

@sadtoday21 good luck for tomorrow. Do let us know how you get on x

Not quite sure when my next milestone is @sadtoday21 - I have a Diabetes test at 28 weeks as my mum is type 1...but 28 weeks feels like a long time away. We are moving rooms around in the house (we are moving bedrooms to the middle floor) so that we can be close to her when she arrives (well once she is moved in to her nursery). This will absorb a lot of time and hopefully get me to the 28 week test quicker. DH is already talking about getting another scan in 3 to 4 weeks. I said we can see how we go and see how the anxiety flares up. I am feeling her more now, so hopefully this will help with the anxiety. I must admit that the first 14 weeks really dragged, but since then time has picked up speed a little.

I hope your MW is a good one @Catconfusion - tbh I saw the MW at 6 weeks (she was the nice one who got me in for scanning and got me int he system for the 12 week scan) but we didn't actually do all the booking in stuff until 12 weeks as I didn't want to go through getting a book again until I was further on. Although I haven't quite gelled with my community MW, she has asked to see me every 2 weeks at the moment due to my anxiety. It's nice she wants to keep an eye on me, but do feel like i am taking up her time. She has also offered to show us around the birthing suite in 3 weeks time - actually @sadtoday21 this could be my next milestone.

Anyone want to make another thread? I'm not sure how.

@Navy123 so pleased your scan went well today. Try to enjoy your holiday and fingers crossed the scan in two weeks shows things are continuing to progress nicely.

@Bellasblankexpression @Beaglemum93 thanks for the reassurance! I've not always been good at taking it right after food but you've reminded me it's important.

@sadtoday21 good luck for tomorrow, hope all is well. Is someone going with you who can help with the anxiety?

@Newbie21 thanks, holiday should be relaxing - completely off grid so time for reading and chilling out. Although who knows how much I will miss out on in here - perhaps I should just skip to thread 4 which I'm sure we will be on by then!!

Goodness this thread moves fast. Struggling to keep up.

Thanks ladies. Very anxious for tomorrow.

@sadtoday21 fx for you tomorrow!

@Catconfusion dokey you've been having a hard time with midwife too. What is it with some medical professionals. I'm so grateful I have a kind understanding midwife.

@Frillyfarmer that nightmare sounds like our worst nightmare. Thank goodness that's all it was and not real.

@MyHeartIsBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue I am wondering how many more private scans I'll be doing if this turns out ok tomorrow. Glad all is looking well, what a relief!

@Navy123 good news on your scan. Fx the next is equally as promising.

@VenusStarr glad you had a good GP appointment.

Sorry if I've missed anyone, have found it hard to keep up today.

I'll sort a new thread out for us as this is coming close to the max number of posts allowed.

New thread ladies:

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/3660600-The-Graduates-of-TTC-after-pregnancy-loss-thread-3-The-Penguin-Huddle?watched=1

I'm miscarrying as I'm typing this. Started with a dull pain in my back earlier on. Came home and bleeding started. Red. With clots. Very bad back pain. No cramps. It was too good to be true, this natural conception. I've never miscarried naturally. Don't even know what to expect and scared of it 😢😢😢 thank you for all your support!

Oh @Russkispy I'm so so sorry. We're with you xx

@Russkispy. I'm so so sorry you're going through this. Expect bleeding for over a week and you'll pass the pregnancy sac too. I expect you won't be able to see the fetus as it'll be tiny.
Thinking of you x

@Russkispy I'm so so so sorry you're going through this. Take some painkillers as there is a chance it will be painful. Hopefully it won't be as bad as my first loss. Once you've passed the baby/sac you may bleed for 1-2 weeks. I suggest using maternity pads as they're thicker and more heavy duty. I found bleeding was heavier than regular AF. I hope you have lots of support and are being looked after. Sending you a massive hug

@InDreamland thank you! My DH just popped out to Asda to get maternity pads as I've only got regular ones here. Got my heated lavender bag on my back and I'm not in pain anymore as took ibuprofen. No tummy cramps. The shock is wearing off and we even mentioned our plan B! I have to think nice and positive thoughts while going through and the plan B is keeping me afloat st the moment. In a way glad it happened after I put my DD to sleep as didn't have to deal with her and didn't want her to see me upset. I'm ok now. The initial shock reaction is wearing off now. I'll be ok

You will be okay, and nice that you have a lovely supportive partner and are talking about plan B.
Pamper yourself, take a few days off work, eat cake and drink wine. And enjoy some cuddles with your gorgeous daughter.

I watched a lovely series online called the dectorists ( it was uplifting and calming at the time) and did all the things that I wasn't allowed to do such as eating rubny egg (before they lifted the warning) and bacon sarnies and drinking wine.
I know it seems silly, but it got me througb some difficult times. Life is so shitty and hard sometimes, but you are strong and you can get through this. At times like this I try and think about what I do have, rather than what I don't. I don't know if that will help you or not. x

@Russkispy Glad your husband is looking after you. You WILL be okay. You are allowed to grieve, but you will be okay in time xx

I am so so sorry @Russkispy this is so unfair for you to have to go through this. My thoughts are with you and your family. Xx

@Russkispy I'm glad it sounds like DH is looking after you. Nice to hear you're discussing plan B. Your strength is so inspiring x

I am so sorry @Russkispy sending lots of love ❤️ I'm glad you're being looked after by dh. What a cruel thing to happen 💔 you will be OK and we're all here for you xx

@Russkispy sorry to hear this, hugs and

So sorry for your loss @Russkispy. I hope you've got plenty of support at home x

@Russkispy I'm so sorry. Sending lots of love xxx