The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread #2 "The Penguin Huddle " 🐧🐧🐧

[InDreamland]

Hello Ladies

Starting a new penguin huddle thread as the first one is getting very full. This is for those of us who've graduated from the conception boards.

Getting a BFP after pregnancy loss is not necessarily a happy time so this is a safe place to vent, worry and share news (good, hopefully, or bad).

I hope you are all here for the long-haul. But you are welcome no matter how briefly.
Others who are pregnant after loss but who weren't on the original thread are of course welcome too.

Let's start the roll call:

Me:
No living children, 3rd pregnancy, currently 8+3. Had early scan at 7 weeks that showed baby measuring right for 7w with a heartbeat. Got another early viability scan booked in for this Tuesday at 8+6. Really scared I've lost this one again.
2 previous pregnancies ended in mmc at 12+3 (baby stopped growing at 5 weeks) in July 2018 and mc (CP but hate that term) in November 2018. Before then had been TTC for 5 years so our journey has been 6 years since starting to TTC.

@KnitKitty @Yukka @rubyroot @Bluebelltulip @MyHeartisBrokeButIHaveSomeGlue @Amanda81 @boboelephant @Newbie21

Who have I missed?

Thanks @VenusStarr I have some butterflies in my tummy. I'm not sure how much we'll see today but hopefully a bit of reassurance in the right place. I'm only 4 plus 1.

I did another test this morning and it was a blazing positive. I had nightmares that the line disappeared and I was bleeding heavily at the ultrasound. The test eased my mind a bit. I'm going to try and step away from the tests now.

I hope you're feeling a bit more reassured this morning for the moment. I'm just not sure it'll go away. I will take your example and treat today as a day I'm pregnant. Xx

Hey everyone, can I just ask did anyone else take progesterone suppositories? I'm due to start today and a bit worried about side effects as I'm so sensitive to hormones. Xx

Good luck today @Russkispy and @Catconfusion!! I really hope the bleeding stops @ReeReeR and that you can find some peace. Xxx

Morning ladies, just popping on to wish those of you having scans good luck today. Got everything crossed for you.

@ReeReeR you are in my thoughts

Sorry am struggling to keep up with so many posts and work is mad! X

@Catconfusion I am using progesterone. The waxy feel isn't great. I struggle to pick out which drugs are causing which symptoms but EPAU said the progesterone May increase cramping and sore boobs x

Thanks @sadtoday21 I'm nervous but it'll be ok! Xx

I'm so so sorry @ReeReeR I hope it's not what you think and all is well! Xx

Thanks @fnej01 it's probably a case of going for it and hoping for the best. I'm not convinced I have low progesterone but it seems statistically helpful after more than one loss. Xx

@Catconfusion I don't have low progesterone either but I have struggled previously with implantation (I have APS and UNK cells) They felt it might support but certainly won't do any harm.
Warning - The wax kind of melts panty liner glue and destroys your knickers so I would say put your best frillies away and get some cheap ones that you are happy to chuck away. Fun fun fun!

I saw the GP and she was lovely. She had read my notes so knew about my full term loss earlier this year (joined a new GP surgery this week). She said she can hand on heart say people have bleeding and go on to have successful pregnancies but it is too early to tell and too early to refer me to EPU so suggested another test in a week. She said her door is open and even if reception says she’s busy to ask them to flag up to her, which was nice.

Good luck to those with scans coming and congrats to those who have had good news

Lovely scan pic - so pleased for you @InDreamland x

@fnej01 😂😂😂 what we do for our babies!

I'm probably just stressing over nothing. The Tommy's trial was very interesting. I haven't spotted in pregnancy but I guess hormone fluctuations could have caused my mmc. Taking progesterone will cover that base. I'll just have to buy a pack of cheapie knickers! Xx

I'm so happy that you have a supportive GP @ReeReeR sorry no one can give you an answer right now

@ReeReeR so glad you had such a lovely GP experience. Hopefully the spotting will stop so you can feel more reassured. Xx

Hey ladies

I had a private scan on saturday and I saw my little baby kicking away but now my tender breasts and other symptoms have disappeared I am 11+5 now... has anyone else experienced there symptoms fading near the end of the first trimester? I thought you had tender breasts throughout the pregnancy :( I am so worried! x

Hi @Rmac90, yes, you are right on schedule to see some of your symptoms fading! Tenderness can absolutely come and go, mine were much more tender in the first 8 weeks or so as they were growing than they are now.

If you saw baby and all looked well at 11+5 your chances are now incredibly good that all will be ok, even though it's so hard not to worry!

@VenusStarr Glad you're still getting strong lines.

Saw the doc earlier and he was really helpful. Referring me to obstetrics to discuss with them if there is anything we can do to help, and also to the epu for hopefully a scan tomorrow/Friday. Going to phone me back later with times etc. Really hope they can fit me in before we go away as otherwise that's nearly 2 more weeks to wait. He also said that all the tests gynae had asked for before have come back normal, and he won't remove my referral to them yet in case this doesn't work out - so I don't have to go to the back of the queue.

@Rmac90 symptoms can tail off around the end of the first trimester as the placenta takes over the payload. They will come back with a vengeance later on (or at least they did with my first!) try not to worry too much after a good scan xx

@Catconfusion I've had that dream too! So annoying because I always think it is a sign of things to come and get extra paranoid afterwards. Good that your lines are still strong.

@ReeReeR so glad you have a supportive gp, although frustrating that they can't do any more yet. How far along should you be?

@coconutlatte44 @Frillyfarmer thanks so much ladies! I get my NHS scan next thursday but the days just seem to be dragging in! Although the nerves I get going for a scan make me so ill just incase i hear those dreadful words again! Xx

It's horrific @Navy123 isn't it!? I'm sure it's not predicting anything but so unpleasant. Xx

@Rmac90 I hope the scan day comes as quickly as possible. Xx

So I have good news and bad news. I don't have any cysts the sonographer is worried about but a few more than normal, not quite what she would class as polycystic.

Unfortunately she could not see the sac yet though I didn't really feel she looked as this wasn't a pregnancy scan. She kept saying I'm 6 weeks by my lmp but no sac. I had to argue with her about when I got the positive test and only ovulated two weeks ago do it's 4 weeks 1 day. Anyway she said she wouldn't expect to see the sac so early. My lining is apparently thicker than normal but I had to drag that information out of her.

Tbh I'm a bit upset as she could see I was anxious yet wasn't very reassuring. I'm now panicking about it being ectopic. Anyway 3 weeks until I get scanned again so need to stay calm xx

@Catconfusion sorry she wasn't more reassuring but I suppose it wasn't her focus today, although you can also be supportive to an anxious patient even if you can't directly help them. I hope the next three weeks go quickly.

My appointment list is getting longer quickly, I now have 5 things booked in and more will get added in the next 10 weeks. I find it helps having an appointment coming up though, I found 4 weeks between my 12 week scan and midwife appointment dragged.

@Rmac90 smaller around 12 weeks and the tenderness definitely left and didn't come back. In fact they were smaller in the second and third trimester than they were the first.

@Catconfusion she sounds like a shite sonographer and probably didn't look hard enough. I had a scan at just over 4 weeks. I thought I was closer to 5 weeks, but sonographer said was closer to 4. She said she couldn't be sure but could see a blip that could be the start of intrauterine pregnancy, but I think the fluid filled space was only about 2mm. Was it a transvaginal you had. She also said I had a thick lining. I had hcg tested and then another scan three days later which showed the blip had grown. Can you get a private scan perhaps in 10 days or so? If you are 4 weeks then you would most likely see a yolk sac then, but maybe not a heartbeat?

Thanks everyone. GP was lovely but have a heavy af now so think I’m out. I would have been 4+4 today so I’m trying to just see it as a late af and not our month. It’s six months this week since we lost our daughters so I’m feeling a bit emotional and hormones must be a bit all over. Best of luck to you all and hope to join you again soon.

@ReeReeR my thoughts are with you, I found 6 months a hard milestone to reach without this added stress as well. I hope to see you back here soon.

Thanks ladies. Had my scan this morning and I'm measured now 6w4d and consultant wasn't worried about that at this stage. We saw a heartbeat! But consultant told me I have relatively large yolk sac. I don't even know what that means?! Good, bad, ugly? I kept asking him. He said it's large than normal and he will rescan me in 2 weeks time. Despite seeing the HB I left deflated because of enlarged yolk sac as nobody really confirms good or bad news. Everything else looked absolutely fine. Has any of you experienced that? Do you know who did? What does it all mean? Walking away, thinking, bloody hell, nothing ever is straight forward! On the flip side , the brown discharge/bleed/spotting completely stopped yesterday morning.
@Catconfusion what's wrong with these people! Where's their compassion ffs! Hope you're ok. Big hugs

@ReeReeR I'm sorry. I went through exactly this on this thread. Started bleeding around the same time as you 4 1/2 weeks. That bleed was the 9th June and then I came back shortly after when I had a positive test on the 10th July. I have no idea what this one will lead to, I'm just hoping for the best. It is still hard though and a loss is a loss.
I tried to think philosophically about it. That my body at last was doing the right thing and getting rid of a pregnancy that wasn't to be. I don't think I've forgiven my body for carrying a very unhealthy baby until 13 weeks when I had to terminate it.
I guess this was my way of coping with the 'chemical pregnancy' Calling it a chemical pregnancy was also my way of dealing with it.
You'll find your own way. I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this. X