The Graduates of TTC after pregnancy loss thread

[KnitKitty]

Hello,

Starting a new penguin huddle for those of us who've graduated from the conception boards.

As I said in the old TTC thread, getting a BFP after pregnancy loss is not necessarily a happy time so this is a safe place to vent, worry and share news (good, hopefully, or bad).

I hope you are all here for the long-haul. But you are welcome no matter how briefly.
Others who are pregnant after loss but who weren't on the original thread are of course welcome too.

My stats:
TTC since Dec 2017
Age: 31
TTC no.1
1 MMC and 3 early losses between 4-5 weeks (or, CPs, but I hate that term) all happened last year within the space of 10 months.
Currently 6+1 with 5th pregnancy

@InDreamland @moonpeace @Bluebelltulip @hayleyfx @Laney79 Please add others I may have forgotten!

@Dramaqueen14 same here at 5+4. I don't recall this in other pregnancies either!

@Dramaqueen14 with my first pregnancy I constantly felt like I had wet discharge and I'm feeling it now the last couple of days which also makes me feel like I've started bleeding. I've also felt like a couple of times as if a bubble of air/ gas had escaped from my vagina......... what's that about? Something else for me to worry about?

@rubyroot glad to hear your midwives are supportive.

@Newbie21 hope you get a little sickness but not enough to ruin the holiday. I don't think I can register online, last time I had to phone up.

@Yukka thank you. I will check it out online and see what our maternity services say. If I every get that far I will talk about anxiety.

So far today no more spotting, nothing at all. Not on pad or when I wipe. I do feel though something will happen soon. I went to the gym but took it so gently ..... was almost not worth the workout. I'm so used to really going for it. What's the max heart rate you should have when pregnant? again sitting at my desk today and it suddenly went up to 88bpm. Wasn't helped I was asked to sign maternity leave card .......I just can't cope with pregnant women at work and their perfect easy journey.

Hi everyone, I’ll start with my stats...

Age:28
DSD: 11yo
DD1: Late miscarriage at 21 weeks in Nov 2019

Just got my BFP today. I don’t really know how to feel. Obviously I’m over the moon but bugger me it’s scary.

@Mylittlerainbow welcome to the huddle. The group is so supportive and understanding the worries that come with pregnancy after loss. Congratulations on your BFP.

Still nothing on pad overnight ladies so please don't tell me off but I did more tests this morning and got these (all with same sample). Definitely stronger lines now. I'm gonna wait until Friday to take a CB digital.

I'm 15 or 16 DPO now.

@KnitKitty how's the cold now? Hope it's gone. Any more sickness?

@theAntsareMyFriends hello and welcome! I hope the hematomas don't cause any problems. Could they reabsorb/go away on their own? I'm totally with you on feeling hopeful one minute and resigned the next... This is exactly why we need each other!

Hi @Dmr1996 as someone else has said, symptoms do come and go... and each pregnancy is different. I find that one hard to believe, but there's so many women who have had completely different pregnancies with each child, it has to be true. It's so hard not to compare them though. Wishing you luck! Are you getting any reassurance scans?

@niamhzs good luck for your scan today! I'm glad the HCG and progesterone were good results.

@Dramaqueen14 I was much wetter for a couple of weeks. I blamed the progesterone pessaries, but I'm still taking them and don't feel as wet anymore, so who knows. I'm pretty sure increased discharge is normal with pregnancy.

@Newbie21 My morning sickness started towards the end of week 5 and beginning of week 6. But a lot of women don't get it (as you have already experienced). Mine seems very intermittent and I feel fine most of the time... It's not getting in the way of life at the moment.

@InDreamland Ahh, the fanny farts! I had that for two or three days straight at the beginning of this pregnancy... How embarrassing! Haha! I believe it's due to increased progesterone... So it's a good sign.
It's really good that you've had no more bleeding and those tests look great! I don't blame you for wanting to do a CB on Friday, but those look fairly conclusive; and your AF must officially be late now? Can I say a tentative congratulations and I'm hoping for the best to you now?

Hello @Mylittlerainbow Welcome, and congrats on the BFP. I imagine your thoughts are all over the place right now, which is normal! Do you have a lot of support in place?

The cold is still raging unfortunately and feeling really tired this morning, but no sickness (there seems to be no pattern with the sickness at the moment... it's very sporadic which doesn't feel very reassuring.)
Only two days until the scan now. I feel like I'm getting my hopes up and that's scaring me. OH keeps talking about the baby and if it's a boy or a girl and names and it's making me nervous that he's setting himself up for a fall - although I am really enjoying him talking about it and getting involved.
I've got my weekly acupuncture tonight so that should help calm the nerves, but I've already started having bad dreams about the scan.

How is everyone else today?

@KnitKitty sorry the cold is still bad. Hate having colds. Hope you're getting plenty of rest and vit C. Could it be a sign that pregnancy is a healthy one as it plays with the immune system? Thank you, I was pleased to see the stronger lines but am still really anxious. Already feeling again like I'm about to start bleeding. AF was due on Monday so officially late which is why I cracked open another FRER. Are the fanny farts very gentle? I feel with me it's just like a tiny discreet gentle feeling of a weeny bubble of air very occasionally coming out. Fx for your scan! How far along are you now? My acupuncturist is off I think this weekend which is a real shame, I really need a session with her.

@moonpeace thank you. The reassurance is for about 30 mins and then the anxiety starts again. Are you doing anything for the anxiety? Like acupuncture or meditation or something? Totally understand the worry. Could you get reassurance from HCG test/early scan?

Thank you for the welcome

@KnitKitty and @InDreamland I'm not really sure about what my chances are with the hematomas. I managed to last a few days before googling and of course found lots of people who's hematomas had reabsorbed and caused no problems and lots who's had triggered a miscarriage. The only way I cope if complete denial so I've only just arranged my MW appointment which means I've not been able to ask anyone. I've not had any bleeding which sometime I take as a good sign.

@InDreamland those tests look good and getting darker. When I had my early (5week) MC my tests never got darker so I really hope this is a the start of something good.

@Mylittlerainbow congratulations on your BFP.

Congratulations to the new joiners! Sorry for your previous losses but this is a good thread to support each other.

@InDreamland those lines are looking great! And I'm so glad to hear that the bleeding stopped.

@Dramaqueen14 the increased discharge is normal in pregnancy, it's the body's way of trying to prevent infection.

Good luck for your scan today @naimhzs!

I checked for a heartbeat this morning using a foetal doppler and found it so baby is still alive at 12+3 so I'm now officially further along than I've ever been. Still terrified it's all going to go wrong again though.

@rubyroot @InDreamland thank you for the reassurance, you’re right it’s normal for them to come and go and each is different.
@KnitKitty it is so hard to not compare but I think hearing other stories and seeing the statistics of having a healthy pregnancy have been helping. I’ve booked a private scan for next Thursday I should be 8 weeks.

I saw my midwife Saturday which I felt was very early but assumed it was because of the miscarriage. I never made my midwife appointment last time. She simply said it was to fit everyone in because there was a lot who were pregnant in my area. I explained my anxieties but she didn’t offer any early scans really said it was probably a bad luck occurrence. I knew I couldn’t wait until the 12 weeks if I get there to have one so I just thought sod it id rather pay.
As for the increase in discharge I agree too I’ve had lots of discharge everyday since i got my BFP and I think the same last time too.
Hope you’re all well today

@Beaglemum93 that's great that you have found the heartbeat. Is this the first time you've managed to find it? I've got a doppler at home which helped after my other MC but I've been a bit scared about using it too early and not finding anything. If you get to 12 weeks with a heartbeat the chances of things going wrong are very low.

@Dmr1996 in my area they won't see you before 10 weeks and then are always booked up so last time I was 11 weeks when I saw the MW and this time I will be over 12 weeks. Its a nightmare so I think getting people in early makes sense. I also paid for early scans as 12weeks was too long to wait. I hope your scan next week goes well.

@theAntsareMyFriends I've been able to find it since 10 weeks but it's much easier to find now.

Welcome to the new people.

@InDreamland happy to hear that you haven't had and more bleeding, those lines look good too.

I've just been to the dentist and how I managed not to be sick I do not know. Now really feel like I need to eat but I can't until the anesthetic wears off.

@Beaglemum93 congratulations on the scan and good that you found the heartbeat. That’s a major milestone reached to be the furthest you’ve been so far so that’s very positive!
@theAntsareMyFriends it’s like they have to try and get lots of people in all at once if they don’t offer it before 10 weeks, it’s not really fair to those who need the extra support because of extra anxieties. I was worried about keeping paper work with me as a reminder but it’s paperless so it’s all on an app. I downloaded it and deleted it again for now, i still don’t feel 100% about it all yet. Thank you

Ladies this is driving me nuts. Went to the loo for a wee and there is a tiny bit of light brown discharge on my pad (wearing thin pad for security for when I start bleeding). Also feel really heavy in my lower abdomen and nether regions. Not a good sign. Pretty sure I felt that way before mc#2.

@theAntsareMyFriends fx your ones reabsorb.

@Beaglemum93 that's great about finding the heartbeat. Wish I could reach that stage.

@Bluebelltulip that must be a good sign feeling sick.

@InDreamland I'm still hopeful that this could be ok for you. Brown blood is old blood so it could still be implantation bleeding. I had quite a lot of brown spotting for weeks so fingers crossed it's just settling in x

Thanks @Beaglemum93 .what about the heaviness though. Actually feel like bleeding is about to start.

InDreamland Holding my breath for you. I understand all sorts of weird sensations are totally normal in the early weeks. Lots if women spot too, it's just so triggering for us lot.

Could you ask your GP for two sets of HCG bloods? Lots are reluctant to do this but you could explain that while you know rising HCG doesn't necessarily equal a good outcome, anything that can offer you reassurance and a sense of doing something would be therapeutic. Assuming that they have access to a phlebotomist it's such a cheap intervention anyway.

I wouldn't worry about booking late to the midwife. I think it's just weight/bloods/pregnancy 101 which can probably safely wait a week or two. Our cohort of women are so cautious anyway, I doubt you'd need a midwife to tell you about folic acid and no booze.

With exercise I think the risk is more your core temp increasing, but I vaguely remember someone on here had an RMC consultant suggested no exercise for the 1st tri at all. I'm not aware of the evidence base for this though.

To add - I remember a 'heavy' feeling is what tipped me off to POAS when I got my BFP. Your insides are probably moving around already, give yourself permission to feel a bit odd

Just been for my scan, and there it was the gestational sac😍 all I wanted to see at this scan. Back in 10 days to hopefully see embryo! Left the haunting place on a positive for a change!😃

@Niamhzs great news about your scan.

My midwife moved my booking appointment earlier as she wanted to check I was getting support. Where I am you generally need to book your appointment fairly early as they get booked up. When I tried to book one for DD2 I asked at 5 weeks hoping to get one about 8 weeks and was told there were no appointments until I would be 11 weeks. While they might grumble if you book in 'late' its not uncommon when you have had a previous loss. Obviously it may be harder to get a 12 scan appointment. The only time dependant aspects I'm aware of are the sickle cell and thalassemia screening which should be done before 10 weeks.

My DH is struggling today, last night he told me he wishes he could take some of the burden off my body and today he's said that he has nearly cried a few times.