Staying posifrickentive- Thread 9 for ladies pg after mc

[sundayraspberry]

Right that wasn't so hard! Let's hope everyone finds us still

Ta I'm just so nervous of taking anything as last time I had a very bad back and took a lot of paracetamol. But I can feel it turning into a migraine so might have to man up!

whatser well done for getting through the booking in appt and facing it, hope the early scan gives you some reassurance.

princess cbd 2-3 doesn't sound that bad for 6 + 1, bodies are different and it's only 93% accurate from what it says on the box. as I can relate to the anxiety though, I'm 6 + 4 and still hypervigilant for any possible issues, even though I haven't found any evidence to worry about yet..

Quietly creeping in (with a brand new NC as I know a colleague possibly knows my usual name)

I had a mmc in January. Got bfp today... not sure if I'm 3 weeks 4 weeks or possibly 8 weeks!

Really strongly felt that I was pg last month and poas but got a negative, then had a really weird light (for me) period.

AF wasn't due until tomorrow but I've been getting really strong symptoms the last few days (nausea, sore boobs, a 'stretchy' feeling) that I didn't get until about week 7/8 last time.

Anyhow... Trying not to get too excited but I generally feel more positive this time, last time it just felt wrong and I was convinced from the start I would miscarry. Feel a bit sad that I don't have the innocence of a first pregnancy to enjoy though.

Just going to hang around here with people who understand

Oh princess please stop taking those tests, I've read an awful lot of ladies having the same issues with them not being accurate. I know the waiting must be driving you crazy and I totally sympathise having been there.

whatser I'm really pleased for you about the early scan. The reassurance is great. Did seeing the midwife change anything for you? Does it feel anymore real?

macauley if I needed something for headaches in my previous pregnancies, I would take one paracetamol rather than my usual two. I only took one if I was really struggling but seems your doing the same. I suffer with cluster headaches so know how awful that pounding can be!

pasta congratulations :-) how you described this pregnancy and your last is exactly how I felt last time and this time too. Last time was a second miscarriage and I just worried right from the beginning. I knew things weren't as they were supposed to be. This time (currently sitting around 5+2) I feel very calm about it....I think I almost feel confident this one is going to stick. That's the first time I've voiced that :-/ I don't want to get optimistic and excited but I just feel like it'll be ok.
I really hope it works out for you too.

So this last 2 days, the nausea has well and truly taken hold :-/ I feel gross but at the same time I can't help feel glad. With the miscarriages, I didn't feel sick at all. First one I suffered terrible exhaustion and the second I barely felt anything. I try drinking my tea now and all I can taste is the milk in it...and I don't drink it milky! It's almost like someone has put cream in it. Yuk. My partners coffee breath has me churning too. I'm going to embrace this right now and take it as a positive!!

Mac I'm getting a lot of headaches and have taken the full paracetamol dose about 4 or 5 times so far this pregnancy. I try to grit my teeth and bear them but sometimes I just feel so fed up with feeling crap that I take the painkillers. I wouldn't want to take them daily, but from time to time I have no issue with it.

Ugh lynsay I feel your pain. It does seem cruel to develop a supersonic sense of smell and taste just when your stomach is so unsteady. I can smell the cat's breath across the room and can't let DH breathe on me or kiss me. Even DD smells rather too much of sweaty body all the time. And don't get me started on the weird taste of everything and the permanent vile metallic twang in my mouth that is making water taste horrid!

whatser glad you've got a scan arranged. Have you got long to wait?

Got to do more GP nagging soon but I can't quite bring myself to do it. It's always a hassle and you have to justify yourself to receptionists which I feel a bit weird about. I need to book more bloods for my thyroid, and to let the GP know I've increased my dose, and need to request a repeat on my nausea meds. Does anyone else find that you need to be very proactive all the time?? Got booking in next Tues and I will have to chase up with the midwife to find out when my consultant appt will come through. I find it bizarre that underactive thyroids are a known risk to pregnancy, most particularly in the first trimester, requiring an expert to be regularly checking/adjusting etc, and mean that you are consultant led.... however, in none of my pregnancies have I seen a consultant until well into the second tri. All the while the GP is saying "I don't really know what I'm doing, we need to get you into the consultant" and I have to take in printed out NICE guidelines, organise my own bloods and adjust my own meds to keep things stable. Grrrr. Excuse my rant, I find it infuriating.

I feel okay after yesterday. I think the only thing that will help is getting a positive result at the scan. I have mentally prepared myself for both outcomes. I feel a bit more protected this time. I think because it was such a shock the first time, that can never happen again because I know what the worst case scenario is. The scan is in a few days so not long to wait. Scary, and time is passing so slowly, but im okay.

That's great whatser. I'm still waiting on my scan date which should be happening next week but I've never heard anything not sure if I should phone and chase. I do just want to know now so I can mentally prepare myself.

My colleague is going to be trying again for a baby. I've just had this horrible feeling that I'm going to have another loss and have to watch a healthy pregnancy not far away from me. Would life be that cruel to throw that at me twice? I've had to watch my SIL who was due same time as my first mc was due so it's a genuine fear of mine. Then I feel such a bitch because she's so lovely.

I think it's perfectly normal to feel like that, Mac. It's not that you don't want them to have their baby, it's just hard to watch. Perfectly valid feelings

I'm only 2 days into this nausea and I already want to curl into a ball and cry!! My nose is like a bloodhounds and my stomach is all over the place. And I look about 5 months gone....when I'm only 5 wks!! Partner called me 'precious' earlier due to me being apparently snappy...I don't see it though?!

butterfly I'd agree that sounds bonkers.

Mac I find it easier in this unpredictable situation to accept my feelings are my feelings, and that I don't choose them or control them, or need to beat myself up about them. I've struggled with other people getting and staying pregnant while I haven't, but it helped me when another friend was very open about her own pregnancy loss after having a healthy child as that put it in perspective - we'll get our turn too

Thanks everyone for you kind words. I miscarried this afternoon. The scan I had booked next Monday, to check for viability, will now be used to check that the miscarriage is complete.

I am washed out and weary, but thankful that I didn't have the agonising wait that I expected. Physically, this miscarriage was much easier than my last. So that is a small blessing I can be thankful for.

We have issues with sub fertility (unexplained secondary infertility), and conception is a challenge (this was my 2nd conception in 5 years of ttc, both mc) so I don't think we can assume we'll get another chance. To be honest, I am not sure I could face doing this again anyway.

Good luck to everyone navigating the perilous early weeks of pregnancy. I hope for happier outcomes for you all.

So sorry, Yorkshire.

So very sorry Yorkshire. Take good care of yourself

Oh yorkshire, I'm so very sorry . I'm glad it's been a bit easier than last time, I hope you can get plenty of rest to physically recuperate, but emotionally it's always much harder isn't it. Gentle hugs for you xx

So sorry to hear that yorkshire. Hope you have the RL support you need.

Hugs Yorkshire. So sorry

Look after yourself Yorkshire

Just popping back with a dilemma for you ladies.

I was supposed to have my booking in appointment with the midwife on Monday but she texted me and cancelled. She works out of a birthing centre so I'm guessing they had a woman come in who was in labour.

She asked if I could come in the afternoon on the Monday but I had work so text back and asked for some other options. I haven't heard anything since except to say she's put a letter in the post with my scan date.

Now - this midwife - I met her last year during my first pregnancy. She works part private, part NHS. I was going to use her as a private midwife last year but this year money situation has changed so I'm going down the NHS route.

When I rang her this time to tell her about my pregnancy she said to book in with her at the NHS clinic and then maybe later we can barter for the private midwifery in return for my DH's skills he's a painter and decorator. I thought this was all ok.

I'm now starting to worry though as I haven't heard anything. I don't know whether to wait or whether to just ring my doctors and get an appointment with the midwife booked. I'm already 10+4

How can I tell whether she doesn't want to be my midwife and has changed her mind?? She suggested the 'bartering'

I don't know what to do

just off to work now but will check back later x

I wouldnt bother. Just ring your doctors and get booked in. You dont want to miss out on scans because of it. Ring today. If you want the nuchal fold it has to be done between 11 and 13 weeks. You havent got much time so get in asap.

Apparently my scan is booked and the letter is in the post but it's the rest I'm unclear about

It sounds really unprofessional. Is there any particular reason as to why you'd prefer her as your mw?

Oh Yorkshire I'm so sorry. Lots of hugs and best of luck to you! Xx

I guess I like the idea that I'd know my midwife and would potentially be able to stay out of hospital. Also I think because I was going to go with her last time I was just going to stick with what I know.

I'm gonna have to ditch my ideas now. I'm so gutted. I just liked her philosophies and ethos around birthing

That sounds so strange! She shouldn't be using her nhs time to try to get private work. And also bartering for service sounds dodgey. If scan is booked and lets be honest that's all of our priority not the booking in form filling exercise, then I would just phone doctor and book an appointment that way. At least whenever it is its not going to affect your scan date.