Staying posifrickentive- Thread 9 for ladies pg after mc

[sundayraspberry]

Right that wasn't so hard! Let's hope everyone finds us still

Thanks- I certainly hope so mike!! Lol, we are mums before we have our babies and so bound to worry!

Hi ladies! It's been a while (2 months actually!) But here I am again with a little positive test.
I know some of you were here last time with me, didn't expect to be back so soon.
For some reason, yesterday I was just sure in my heart I was pregnant. And I was right when I'm not even due on til tomorrow.
There is zero excitement this time. After the BO, I was sure I'd be fine only to then have the MMC.
My partner isn't excited and I don't feel like I can talk about it to him. I don't want to discuss it with anyone else either as I feel like I don't want to have any kind of positive thoughts put my way, I'm just kinda thinking, in another few wks, I'll be bleeding again anyway so what's the point?
Grrr sorry as I know this is a thread for staying positive, I just have nothing in me to do that!
I'm so pleased to see the ladies I recall are doing so well and congratulations to paws!

Hi Lynsey Welcome back :-) Just wanted to say that I got pregnant again relatively quickly after a blighted ovum (miscarried at 7 weeks in August; pregnant in November) and it is anxiety-inducing, but I'm still here 31 weeks later getting ready to meet my little boy in August :-) We're all here for hand-holding x

Thank you sofia and congratulations! After the BO I was scared but excited. I didn't initially think I would miscarry again but within wks I knew it wasn't right again. I had zero symptoms and had a lot of reddish/pink tinged stuff when I went to the loo. This time I'm just expecting it to happen again. Maybe it's a way of trying to protect myself. I feel in a better place at the moment, I've joined 2 excercise classes and been bike riding and lost a bit of weight (I'm not overweight but had a little to lose!). I guess feeling like I was getting on track, it makes me feel unprepared to deal with all the worry and anxiety that now goes with a brand new pregnancy. I think I'm gonna need a lot of hand holding I'm afraid!!

Just realised I spelt your name wrong, sorry Sophia!

Hello Lynsey, congratulations! So pleased to hear from you again. Well done on the exercise- I reccomend trying to keep it up if you can. It's helped me keep my anxieties under control as well the usual pregnancy aches and pains. Everything crossed for you!

Welcome back to the thread and congratulations.Lynsey, I was on here over Xmas and bowed out with a blighted ovum too in February. It took 9 mths to get preggers last time so I really wasn't expecting it to happen again so soon either. This is my 4th pregnancy, no dc, so am sh1tting it that it will fail too, but am feeling quite calm that I'm doing what I need to and hoping for the best. Btw, being this zen is not normal for me. I'm sorry to hear your DP isn't really there for you at the moment, my DH was trying to damage control with my first very faint bfp. Is he the protective sort? It could just be his way of looking after you right now.

I've got my fx that things get easier for you and am here for hand holding

Thank you :-)
I definitely want to keep up with the excercise but with the types I do, I'm not sure if I can still do them. Instructor is lovely so will talk to her in private.
It's good to know it helps eastend!
mimi I have my fingers crossed for you that all goes according to plan. Keep doing what your doing to stay calm and pass on your tips!
No partner wasn't being protective, he was just being a a**e!! I'd had a glass of wine earlier (before doing the test, I bought the test afterwards) I said I felt guilty for having it, hence my refilled glass sitting there redundant and he just shrugged his shoulders, pulled a face and walked out of the room. Not what I need. He isn't an emotional person at all and seems to think as long as I'm doing my usual thing, I must be fine. I have to have a mini breakdown before he takes notice.
I've decided against the same route I took before with early reassurance scans etc and I'm going to just let nature do its thing

Fab news about the scan chelle

Welcome back and congratulations lynsey, keeping fingers crossed for you this time, hopefully your other half will be a bit more supportive once the news sinks in x

Eastend I take my hat off to you for working until 38 weeks! I've also finished work today, at 34 weeks tho

What exercise are you doing at the moment Lynsey? I wrote a long post about what I've been doing exercise wise but just lost it

Thanks sunday! Have you got some nice things planned for your mat leave?

lynsey I feel exactly the same as you. I'm going to try to be zen like Mimi though!! I did another clearblue digital today (I had promised not to take any more but I caved) & it now says 2-3 weeks which is further than I got last time but not the time before so I feel slightly more positive. It means I was right to chuck out my internet cheapie tests as they were duff. They've caused me an awful lot of stress over the last few days!

Hood everyone else is ok xx

Welcome back Lynsey x

Thanks everyone.
I think I'm staying calm as I just don't believe it'll happen. I've decided not to rush anything, getting in touch with doctors or anything until I'm nearing the 12 wk mark. If I get that far!
eastend I've been bike riding and doing classes that involve a lot of jumping, squats, toning etc. I think one class I do will be ok but the other where jumping is involved worries me. I've never been so actively exercising whilst pregnant so it's new territory.
princess I have fingers crossed for you too and sending positive thoughts. Staying calm is easier said than done a lot of the time but if you can do it, great!! It's surely better than driving ourselves slowly mad with worry.
The test I did was quite a cheap one but the result came up really quickly, even though I tested a day early. Maybe that's a good thing :-/ before I start doing that to myself and giving into mad thoughts, have a lovely weekend everyone!!

I have a cure for the worry ladies - become too sick to care. I have honestly not thought about the fact I am pregnant for the last week, I've been too busy feeling so ill and pathetic. 4 doses into the anti nausea meds and I am feeling a little brighter and have actually eaten a small amount of food which I think has helped. Wish I couldn't still taste it though. Back to numbing my mouth with ice cubes to distract myself from the residual food taste and keep the nausea at bay.

Happy weekends all!

Hope you are still feeling positive chelle after your scan

Sounds awful butterfly, are you sure it's 'just' morning sickness and not a bug? Have you had some help keeping DD entertained now?

Keeping active is a great way to boost mood and feel like you are doing something healthy to help pregnancy along lynsey, a good instructor should tell you what is best avoided.

I have a long list of jobs to keep me busy eastend! Gonna start with the most physical jobs first and save the sofa/internet jobs for the later weeks. House renovations ongoing also. Are you feeling up to much?

Has anyone else struggles to accept a pregnancy is real after miscarriage? I feel a bit detached. I can't remember my due date and only looked in the first place because my mum told me I should. I keep thinking that it will end up in loss anyway. I'm not verbalising this to others but it's not right, is it?

Whatsher however you feel is normal and understandable. Even now I can't beleive we'll be lucky enough to bring our little one home but I'm hoping to keep my worries in proportion

Whatsher I totally get that. It's a defence mechanism I think - 'think the worst & you won't be disappointed'.

I've got so much going on in my belly! It feels like kicking but I obviously know it isn't!! It's that bubbly flippy feeling - wind right?! It feels weird.

Oh blast, I've blown my zen-like calm, I think I've just broke my little toe! just bashed it on the door frame, ouchy ouchy ouchy!

Good work on the exercise Lynsey, filling your system with those feel good hormones can only be good for the soul. I've been riding my bike to work and was hoping to be running again before my toe incident. I read a good article on the beeb about the benefits of exercise in pregnancy and a lot of the concerns being essentially unscientific - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-36402624.

Fx your DP stops doing his backside impression and starts being super supportive one he realises this is not a drill. I've put off having any appts for as long as possible too, well I've got an early scan at 8 wks because I'll go gaga if I have to wait until 12wks and MW is happy to squeeze in a booking appt after I've got the ok. I'm also seeing a NHS counsellor which has helped me accept what I've been through is absolute crap, and I had no control over any of it. I think that's the main reason I'm so calm, I'm pregnant, I have almost no control over the outcome, I might as well enjoy the ride (and I am to be having morning sickness and absolutely knackered!)

whatser I feel exactly the same as you.

Whatser I tend to get all caught up in the hope of each new pregnancy but I remember other ladies saying they didn't feel attached to their bean until about wk20 and several scans. MC makes us not trust our bodies, be kind to yourself hun.

Thanks everyone. I'm glad I'm not alone. I keep thinking 'well it won't last' and I feel like I'm just waiting to find out the worst. I feel really guilty. Either the scan will be fine and I will feel awful for thinking as I do or it won't be fine and I will be all 'I knew it!' I'm not sure which is worse.

That makes sense whatser.
In a way I don't want the scan as its going to make me face up to reality. Whereas I'm quite happy living in my little bubble of pregnancy denial where I just feel like I have a hungry hangover every day and need to take a nap for an hour every afternoon.

I'm lucky to have a very supportive friend in real life who had a number of mc. She made me feel better about this guilt that I feel and that it's quite normal to feel this way.

Hi Guys ( waves) can I join you? I had a miscarriage in February. Just started bleeding heavily after sex when I was about 5-6 weeks pregnant. I am now about 4 weeks and terrified. I keep googling chance of second miscarriage and driving myself crazy. I am also obsessively checking my knickers to the point that I am now committed to only wearing black knicker so I wont know if i have been spotting. I have an ultrasound booked for week 7 but i dont know how i am going to cope until then! Help!

This is normal right?

Hi antonia yes it's normal and lots of knicker checkers around lol. I have one very important piece of advice... step away from Google! It will drive you mad and won't do any good at all.
I'm on the same page as whatser and macauley and I really do think it's self preservation. Nothing at all to feel bad about.

Good news mimi my partner is back to being a normal human being and talked to me properly and calmly today. We expressed the exact same things so we are back on the same page. Phew.

Still standing strong in my decision not to see anyone before I have to, impatience may get the better of me but we'll see.
Thank you so much for all the encouraging words on the excercise front! Thankfully both my classes are run by the same lady and she's lovely so I'm going to have a quiet chat with her asap. She'll be the only other person to know apart from me and my partner!