Pregnancy after infertility

[bananafish81]

Thought I’d start this thread as I find myself feeling quite out of place on the ‘normal’ antenatal club threads - find it difficult to relate to being upduffed after 'just' having some sex, and thinking ahead to buying maternity clothes, how much maternity leave to take, where I’d like to give birth etc

I realise it’s entirely my own issues and that infertility world has clouded my views, but I want to scream ‘DON’T YOU KNOW EVERYTHING THAT COULD GO WRONG!!’.

There’s a thread for pregnancy after previous loss, but thought there might be some kindred spirits who are navigating the world of pregnancy after infertility

Bananafish I also have an AMH of less than 2 and FSH of 16 so almost similar to you! I'm 28 so it was a bit shock to find my ovaries are failing so young.

Hi all- would be lovely to join you. Bananafish I remember you from the thread about older parents, no wonder you were so knowledgeable about IVF when I read your story here. What a journey, huge congratulations.
My story is that we TTC for about 14 months, which isn't hugely long in the grand scheme of things but was up against it for us because I was 41 when we started (met DH late in life). went for tests fairly quickly to discover low AMH that plummeted by half again in the course of 6 months, plus a blocked tube and low sperm morphology! Tried IUI, then IVF (self funded as too old for NHS) and conceived on our second go at IVF (3 embryos transferred) with v high doses of stimms.

I am now 14+ 3. I can well remember the seemingly interminable wait for the 8 week scan at the IVF clinic and the utter weirdness of the same nurse who had scanned my ovaries countless time telling me "yes, there's a baby in there". I think I was reassured for about 2 days after that before the worry set in again- I have had v few symptoms- and the 12 week scan again took forever to come round. I felt like a fraud at my booking in appointment too. To see a tiny human opening its mouth and kicking its legs in there was just surreal and I still have moments of utter disbelief that this thing I tried so hard to make happen for so long seems to have worked out OK.

Really resonated with me what someone said upthread- for us, if things go wrong it is not a case of just dusting ourselves down and trying again, so the stakes are so much higher. Infertility is like a horrible game of snakes and ladders.

I now think I can see a bit of a bump and am finally starting to feel like a proper pregnant lady, but it still makes me uncomfortable to plan, or even think, ahead to the birth. I actually find it odd how people are happy to talk in certainties "so, when the baby arrives, you'll get no sleep" "you should think about buying X buggy" "when you go on maternity leave..."

No way am I buying a thing till whatever week it is that a premature baby has a chance of survival.

And the oddest thing of all- having sex and realising it really is just for fun .

Very best of luck to everyone. Look forward to staying with you until those babies finally start to arrive.

Jessie Yes- what you said about people talking in certainties. Every single time I have mentioned our baby (and I've only just started calling it that in the last week!), I have had to add the caveats 'if things go to plan' and 'touch wood', yet other for others talking about my pregnancy the 'whens' simply roll off their tongues!

DH and I still randomly say to each other 'I really hope things work out...' in the middle of conversations about totally unrelated things.

x

What a brill thread. I am 13 + 3 weeks pregnant with twins post IVF and I also have a little boy age 4 from IUI.

I'm finding this pregnancy very tough. I started drugs in August and had my eggs collected in September. My progesterone was too high for transfer so it was cancelled and I had to wait a cycle to restart. Restarted the drugs again, got to the day before transfer and bled so it was cancelled again, had another cycle which finished just before Christmas and completed the ET which was successful and am absolutely delighted!

However the downside is that after nearly 4 months on drugs of one sort or another I'm not in great condition and am finding the pregnancy incredibly hard physically.

It will all be worth it in the end though!

It's lovely to hear all your stories btw, nothing beats a happy ending!

Good luck with the pregnancies, ladies. I'm watching my 7mo wake up on the monitor and your thread just reminded me how truly precious he is. We waited 5 years for him and eventually went overseas for donor egg treatment, but it was all so so worth it.

I remember the disbelief of pregnancy so much. Every scan was a revelation all over again. I also had a symptom free pregnancy, so it wasn't until the movements started that I relaxed a tiny bit. But it was so hard to believe, and even now I sometimes think WTF is a baby doing in the house? causing mayhem usually

I wish you all healthy happy pregnancies and sneeze births .

Can I join please?

Literally just had my BFP after four years of trying and one round of ICSI. I'm a little bit terrified and not quite able to believe that some time in November there will be a baby. There have been a lot of negative pregnancy tests in my life...

Nice to see you all though, and to know there are people who know how I feel. Every little twinge and niggle is freaking me out!

Xxxxxx

Congratulations Victoria. My first round of ICSI worked too. I still can't believe it at 25 weeks!

I've attached my scan pics from 12 and 20 weeks. It's so amazing to see your baby when you spend so long thinking it's never going to happen for you.

I don't know what the sex is - decided to wait!

I had lots of twinges Victoria in the early days. It does ease as time goes on.

Hi everyone, and thanks for starting such a great thread Bananafish

Currently 22 weeks pregnant following IVF after 3 years of trying. (Have endometriosis)

First 12 weeks was incredibly stressful as I was spotting throughout so it was hard. Even after my 20 week scan i can't help think something will go wrong but it does get easier and I do feel more relaxed about my pregnancy now.

Hope everyone is having a lovely Sunday!

Osirus, that's lovely! I'm so happy for you. I guess we'll have a scan in a few weeks to check how things are going... right now I just feel incredibly weird!

Thanks for the info about the twinges too, that makes me feel a lot better! We were going to stay in all day but I think maybe we'll go round to my Mother-in-law's after all... Feeling a little more festive today for some reason!

Can't believe I'm posting in this but got my first BFP on Friday it was a frozen icsi 5day embryo transfer, what I was wondering is if anyone can work out my due date. Is the pregnancy dated the same as a natural pregnancy. Reason I ask is I've been given a date for 8 week scan which has bee worked out 8 weeks from trader date?!

Thanks! i had fet so didn't tech have egg collection but just dated it back 5 days, so it says I should be 4weeks 6 days and due on 7 Nov! I'm just confused as I've been booked for an 8 week scan, 8 weeks from transfer. Whereas I thought I'd be 2 weeks further on? No? Does that make sense?

I'm really confused too Lynn! Apparently I'm due 8 Nov but I thought it was 9 months starting from your last period. Confusing!

Hello can I join? We've been trying for two years and have been told we wouldn't be able to conceive naturally. My consultant wanted us to try a few months of clomid, and I was due to pick up norethisterone tomorrow morning to get things moving. Apparently my blood tests show I didn't ovulate last month. I did a test on a whim Friday afternoon, and by some crazy miracle it was actually positive!

According to the due date calculators I will be five weeks on Tuesday, so we've found out ridiculously early which is doing nothing for my patience and anxiety levels!

Anyone else obsessively googling EVERYTHING? I'm obsessed with miscarriage statistics, and I've worked myself up into a state over bleeding gums being linked to miscarriage. TMI but everytime I feel anything down below, or wipe after a pee, I'm paranoid. I don't think I'll be able to relax. EVER.

I had a look on the ante natal board for November and just couldn't relate at all!

Hoping this gets easier! All your stories give me so much hope that this might actually work out! Fingers crossed!

Victoria- we have the same due date

Hey Biscuit! That's nice! Welcome! I've been on the internet all day. ALL DAY. I just want this little thing to stick in there and I am so terrified it won't! In other news, my pet chinchilla is usually a very free spirit and runs about the whole time, but at the moment he won't leave me alone. I wonder if he has sensed something? (Soppy about my pet, sorry!)

Great to be part of this thread and to read pregnancy related stories and concerns I can relate to! Thanks Bananafish

We'd been TTCing for about two years (made more difficult by severe endometriosis) and had been urged to do IVF asap due to high FSH levels. I had a septum in my uterus removed to reduce miscarriage risk should I conceive, and then one cycle of IVF in October last year, which was a bit of a disaster as although they retrieved 8 eggs only one fertilised normally and even that was already fragmenting badly when they put it in. We were planning another round, which would be self funding, when I - to my disbelief- fell pregnant naturally. I actually tested negative the day my period was due and didn't test again for a week as I was convinced my periods were just going crazy or I was going into early menopause!

Anyway, now that I'm pregnant I flit between thinking that this might be my only pregnancy and that I'm going to try to relax and enjoy it for as long as it lasts, on the one hand, to feeling that I may just be entering into a whole new phase of possible heartache, as I'm so used to hearing bad news ability my body and my fertility.

It's reassuring to hear other people say they haven't been having severe symptoms as I had been worried by people saying morning sickness was a good sign. I'm just sleepy, have sore boobs and occasional cramps.

I have about 5 weeks until my 12 week scan and time is going painfully slowly but I'm just trying to remember that while it may seem slow to me, everything is going full pelt inside me (hopefully!).

Sorry to ramble on - but it's really lovely to be part of a group that understands and I do enjoy hearing other people's stories.

And we enjoyed hearing yours! :-) congratulations, and we all know how you feel. Xxx

It's amazing to hear most of us have had such a lack of symptoms. I've been the same other than hunger and exhaustion, maybe it's natures way of saying we have had enough crap, time to give us a break. Today marks 13+6 and I'm still constantly on knicker watch, really can't wait for this worry to go away. Perhaps when I can feel baby move it will be easier having the constant reminder that everything is ok? Or perhaps it never will?
We have another scan at the end of March and it can't come quick enough. I've set a countdown on weeks left at work (excluding holidays I have booked) and I only have 19 left
Woo Hoo!

I've just had the worst night ever. I've had pretty strong cramping all night and have been getting up constantly to check for bleeding (none so far). I'm still having cramping and I'm convinced I'm going to start bleeding soon.

I'm beside myself and it's driving me crazy. I'm 5+4. I have an appointment with my doctor this afternoon.

Morning ladies and hello and congratulations to everyone who's joined. It's so reassuring to hear from other like-minded women who can relate to the legacy that infertility leaves even after you get pregnant

I spent so much time reading up on IVF and planning out how many cycles we would try before calling it a bust on my own eggs and moving on to DE that I never thought to read up on what would happen if it actually bloody worked!!!

I am totally with you on the qualifiers when talking about everything. Anything I say is qualified with 'if this one sticks...' or 'if we're lucky enough to...' I'm so bloated I do really need to buy some extra long tops to go under my normal tops, and my underwired bras are digging In, but no way at 9 weeks I'm going to tempt fate by buying anything remotely maternity related!

I didn't want to even go to the GP and get an antenatal referral in case we ended up having to cancel it, but DH pointed out that as I have epilepsy and a fairly major spinal injury, if nothing else they needed to update my notes regarding what meds I am and am not now taking. So I have a booking appt and 12 week scan but am basically planning to get a private scan just beforehand, so if there's anything gone wrong I can ideally cancel rather than find out in an antenatal department full of normals

This video about the emotional side of IVF really really spoke to me - I thought you ladies might appreciate it

m.youtube.com/watch?feature=youtu.be&v=Zej_ce1OSl8

Xx