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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Pregnant at forty and over - thread 2

999 replies

cloudjumper · 12/11/2015 13:21

To continue the support for those of us who are pregnant at forty and over.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
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17
leotwist · 18/05/2016 13:49

Good luck on Monday, MrEBear. How far along are you again?

Rugby01 · 19/05/2016 03:41

mrE - good luck on Monday. Exciting! I know j can't wait for mine in a week or so.

Quick question- does anyone else find it hard to sleep at the moment? I'm about 12 weeks and once I wake up I find it really hard to get back to sleep at night! It's not like me usually. Any tips?

MrEBear · 19/05/2016 16:23

I'm about 9 weeks tbh I've lost track of where I'm at. But roll on Monday.
Yip I keep waking early and not able to get back to sleep.

leotwist · 19/05/2016 16:26

Section on Radio 4's Woman's Hour today about the increasing number of women having babies over 40:
www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b07b9r3c

Rugby01 · 20/05/2016 22:02

Thanks for the link leotwist- am half way through listening to the entire program.

How's everyone doing?

Whatabanana · 20/05/2016 22:54

Hi rugby, I have a scan appointment for the end of June but it feels a million years away. In the meantime I have been getting tired but other than that I still feel like I could be imagining it all. How did you cope with the anxiety of the early days and not knowing if everything was OK or not? It feels so weird not knowing what the future holds!

Rugby01 · 21/05/2016 08:19

Hi whatabanana - I completely understand that feeling! When I got my scan date it felt like a million years away. I think I just found distractions like work which sort of helped on weekdays at least! I still feel like I have no proof that I really have a baby inside me! But i am keeping everything crossed that my scan in a week or so will prove it....some people get early private scans - anyone got experience of that?

Is it your first whatabanana? It's my first and I have no idea what is going on!

Whatabanana · 21/05/2016 09:16

Oh I you must have had a scan already! I have seen people talking about having the early scans but then sometimes the reassurance only lasts for a little bit, so I am not sure it's the answer either. I think you are right about needing to find some other distraction!
This is my third actually- but nearly twelve years since my youngest and nearly fifteen since my first 'surprise'. So not new to me at all but definitely feeling rusty.

leotwist · 21/05/2016 17:40

Sad news, I’m afraid. We had our 9-week ultrasound yesterday and no heart beat could be found. It should have been totally clear, as we’d already seen it two weeks ago and the fetus had continued to grow exactly as it should have. However, they searched from every possible angle and got in the most senior sonographer for a second opinion and, sadly, the conclusion was the same. The pregnancy has simply stopped. They think it must have happened in the last couple of days.

Naturally we’re devastated, partly as we’d felt so optimistic. Our embryos were rigorously screened, as was our 27-year old egg donor. My womb and blood tests have been perfect throughout, and I still have no bleeding or cramps. But then we knew that, as with any pregnancy, it’d probably take more than one go and sometimes there just isn’t an explanation: what happens will happen anyway.

I’m scheduled to have a surgical evacuation under general anaesthesia first thing on Monday. Fortunately, that’ll also help my body reset quickly. At my age, time is of the essence. The one thing that makes our loss now even bearable is knowing we’ve got further embryos to transfer and can try again in a couple of months. So, hopefully, I’ll be back again soon.

In the meantime, I wish you the very best of luck with your pregnancies. I’m massively grateful for everyone’s support, fun and encouragement. As a little old woman with a twinkle in her eye said to me the other day, “every baby’s a miracle.” So try not to worry; in truth, it won’t make any difference anyway. And, even if you don’t always feel great, just feel lucky and enjoy it.

May every one of you and your babies stay healthy, happy and much-loved, all the way. With very best wishes, Leotwist xxx

Rugby01 · 21/05/2016 17:48

leotwist - so so sorry to read your post. I have no words to say. You seem incredibly strong and you have such a huge capacity for optimism, and for seeing the miracle of it all. I am truly sorry and wish you much love and support to get through what must be an extremely difficult time. You are an inspiration and I wish you so much luck and love in the coming months. FlowersFlowers.

EagleRay · 21/05/2016 20:22

Leotwist I'm so sorry - that is terribly sad news Sad

I hope you're back here soon Flowers

shabbychic1 · 21/05/2016 20:40

So sorry to hear leotwist. You sound so strong and positive, I have no doubt we'll be seeing you in here very soon. Much love xxx Flowers

MrEBear · 21/05/2016 23:12

I'm sorry Leotwist. I can't imagine how it feels to carry a baby so long before loosing it. In my 4 year wait I've had 2 very early losses and it is incredibly hard. Remember to give yourself time to grief for your baby.

dats · 22/05/2016 00:14

Oh no, leotwist I am so sad to hear your news. Hope you can find some peace and some headspace to gather yourself for the next shot, when you're ready. Wishing you lots of luck and love - please keep us posted xx

Whatabanana · 22/05/2016 13:44

So sorry leotwist Flowers

shabbychic1 · 22/05/2016 15:55

Hi all, as he's going to be my first does anyone have a recommendation for a baby book- what to do and how etc?

MrEBear · 23/05/2016 06:41

The best one I had for DS was Baby week by week or something. I bought the Hanes Baby Manual as a laugh for a friend who reckoned it was very good too.
You might find you don't really need one.

Ellie2015 · 23/05/2016 14:14

Hello everyone,

Its been long time since I last logged in. Having been suffering from bad tenosynovitis (inflammation of tendons at the base of both thumbs) so not able to type much. Also quite overwhelmed with a diagnosis of Gestational Diabetes since 28 weeks, lost a kilo in diet control and exercise and now finally on medications. But overall I am a bit relieved to reach 33 weeks!

Brooke City and Eagleray Huge congratulations to you all (sorry i do realise i m mega late!) eagle sorry to hear ur baby was in NICU with sugar issues but am glad it was all picked up in right time and baby had treatment meaning no long term effects. City I have been offered a choice between induction of labour and El LSCS and I have chosen CS despite lot of anxiety but am now more worried after reading ur story. I can imagine how horrible it must be for you! 30-40% is a huge mortality risk! Was ur baby on ventilator or cpap? I am sure they must hv given u steroids before section?! Why did they bring foward ur cs date? I appreciate u might not want to share so feel free not to (or u can pm me) but if there is any advice that u want to pass on, that would be great. Hope u and baby r recovering well and counselling is helping u and ur OH xx

Notsold, how are u?

Hello newbees, will try and catch up with u all soon xx

DorsetCharlie · 23/05/2016 21:16

I'm 42 and 9+3...with twins!

I also have a husband who is a severe brain injury survivor. What could possibly go wrong?!?! Confused

Metaphorically sticking my fingers in my ears and singing 'la la la' at the moment so I don't think about it too much Grin

helenatroy · 23/05/2016 21:53

Can I join?

helenatroy · 23/05/2016 21:55

Am 14w 5d. Seventh pregnancy and the furthest I have progressed so far. Keeping everything crossed. Have had 3 scans so far and all looking good..

MrEBear · 24/05/2016 07:38

Dorest you are only a couple of days in front of you. But only having one, confirmed yesterday at scan. At one point in my life I fancied twins until I thought about the cost esp childcare in the early years.

Helen hello, sorry about your losses, good to hear that things are looking good for this one. How old are you?

MrEBear · 24/05/2016 10:39

That was meant to read couple of days in front of ME

allergictodiets · 24/05/2016 14:38

Hi everyone, 41 yo, 27 weeks with DD2 ( DD1 is five ). So far so good - I think I am suffering more from being hypothyroid ( Hashimoto's ) than the pregnancy itself. A bit scared to be honest of the sleepless nights & all the nice stuff :-)

Sheera41 · 24/05/2016 21:19

So, so sorry Leotwist, life can be so unfair, really hope to see you on here again very soon X

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