Can you ladies who are further along tell me when your anxsity started to die down? As I've reached each little mile stone I feel more positive and content but still very worried about getting excited.
As my parents and a few members of my family on my mum's side know (she let slip without realising), I'd talk to dh about telling his family after dating scan. I throught it I would feel okay about it after seeing everything was still going well.
But last night I was actually getting really upset by the prospect of telling them. Mil impaticular worries me; we all have a difficult relationship with her as it is. She loves babies and is going to be really, really excited. With dd we told early, about 5 weeks, as the world knew due to me needing support at work with morning sickness. She was super excited, she went really over the top with buying things, it was all she could talk about. While it might be less full on with second grandchild I just have a feeling it won't as she's asked since dd grew out of tiny baby stage, when we were having another and has been ever since. Being around that level of excitment feels really intmidating. While this baby is very much wanted I'm just not there yet with getting excited about plans and the baby being here. Since the mc it feels more like I need to survive being pregnant, rather than pregnancy just being the waiting time.
Luckily dh is really chilled out on the matter. While he thinks she would like to hear the news he doesn't feel strongly about needing to tell her. We'd already agreed to wait to tell people, just had to tell my mum and dad early as we needed support, and did talk about waiting until 20 ish weeks. His putting no presure on me what so ever, it's all just me feeling like I should feel okay about telling.
I'm getting there with moving forward in other respects so don't think I'm depressed or over anxious with out reason. Had a big disscussion about this with midwife at booking in, so it's kind of on my mind, not that she was worried, just said it was something to be awear of due to the level of sickness I'd been suffering. I'm able to do much more of my normal day to day things now than I was then. I've started to move on to wearing maternity clothes where more comfortable, getting my old ones out, even brought some new ones. Have more little personal mile stones I'm nearing too and feeling much more positive with each one. Don't feel any feelings of doom like I did when I had spotting early one. Just really not ready for this to become the centre of attention and get very excited. It makes me feel slightly crazzy!
Dh told bil, who's known for a long time, I feel like this and he was so nice saying it was only natural. As we'd said we may tell mil or dh would tell her but say we don't want to talk about it yet. But he said to worry more about my feeling and if mil has hurt feeling she'll just have to get over it.
Next big mile stone for me is 26th, when I reach 13 weeks. Hoping I might feel able to cope with her reaction then. Once we get to september we're back to toddler groups where my mum friends know about mc and are very likely to guess I'm pregnant as a couple did when it was all new! Actually worried I'm never going to feel up to it until potentially baby is here.
Can someone tell me it gets better? Or let me know I need to work on building up to it when I can't hide it for a couple of hours a week?