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Pregnancy

Talk about every stage of pregnancy, from early symptoms to preparing for birth.

Another posifrickintive thread for those pregnant after miscarriage #4

992 replies

Treaclepie19 · 05/05/2015 13:47

Welcome aboard ladies - bumps big and small :)

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
TeenieDeenie · 19/05/2015 21:50

Cloud, have you had or are you planning to have an early scan? I'm sorry to hear that your DH isn't emotionally involved, that must be very difficult for you. I guess we all handle these things differently and I pray that it'll get easier for you both in time. X

TeenieDeenie · 19/05/2015 21:50

Cloud, have you had or are you planning to have an early scan? I'm sorry to hear that your DH isn't emotionally involved, that must be very difficult for you. I guess we all handle these things differently and I pray that it'll get easier for you both in time. X

Amyyy27 · 19/05/2015 21:51

Teenie sadly that seems t be the case after mc I know I certainly struggled to believe. I'm still on knicker watch at 15 weeks!

TeenieDeenie · 19/05/2015 21:52

Sorry for the duplicate posts, my phones playing up.

TeenieDeenie · 19/05/2015 21:54

How many scans have you had Amy? I'm going to beg the doctor tomorrow for an early one and pay for a few aswell I think.

Amyyy27 · 19/05/2015 21:58

I had to pay for a private one at 8 weeks, then had my 12 week, (now 14+6) paid for another private at 18 weeks, then got my 20 week scan and will possibly pay for another between then and edd Blush paranoid polly over here lol

Boozle80 · 19/05/2015 22:00

Lol, 33 weeks and still on knicker watch! Think I'll check by habit even after I've had the baby!

TeenieDeenie · 19/05/2015 22:01

I'd imagine we can all relate and honestly I'll probably have a few early ones. My OH and I agreed after mmc that if/when we conceived again, we would get several scans just for reassurance.

cloudjumper · 19/05/2015 22:06

teenie I have just had a scan last Sunday, at 7+6. I am very lucky in that my GP, midwife and EPU all agree that with my history of 4 mcs, an early reassurance scan is more than justified. I am so relieved that all is looking good at the moment!

If you can, I would advise waiting until you are about 8 weeks, before you have a scan. Others will disagree, but from personal experience, anything you see at 6 weeks, if you can see anything at all, is very uncertain and can potentially increase your anxiety. Also, a lot of hospitals will not scan you before 8 weeks anyway (my EPU doesn't).
Def ask your GP about getting a referral - mine phoned the EPU and arranged a scan for me really quickly, which I am so grateful for.

I'm not sure yet if I will get another one before the 12-week scan... 8 weeks is my first big milestone, my first 3 mcs were all discovered at that stage. Thinking I might have a private scan around 16 weeks, though, when I lost my last baby...

Gr33dyeggs · 19/05/2015 22:34

Welcome teenie. 16 weeks here and still anxious as others have said. Although I do find myself getting excited sometimes but then add 'all being well'.

pizzakat · 20/05/2015 07:45

Hi teenie :)

So far I've had scans at 6 & 9 weeks, which are reassuring in the short term but I think we're always going to have those anxieties as other ladies have said.. no harm at all in booking a few of you think it will help! I'm definitely the same as cloud planning on having one around 16/17 weeks as between 12-20 just seems like a lifetime to me.

Posifrickintive note: I got a new job yesterday, starting with a baptism of fire behind the bar on bank holiday Monday

happygojo · 20/05/2015 08:26

WHOOO Pizzakat for what it is worth I LOVED bar work when I did it. I hope it goes well. Have you done bar work before? Make sure you eat! I found bar work the best diet (I am overweight) because you are so busy and time goes fast etc.

TeenieDeenie · 20/05/2015 09:20

Morning all! Thank you for the lovely, warm welcome. I put all the tests on my beside table last night thinking I must have been dreaming, but nope, they're still there this morning! lol

Oh Cloud I'm so sorry to hear about your 4 mc's, you're very brave. Lovely to hear everything is looking good so far in your current pregnancy though. A scan at 16 weeks sounds like a plan.

Hi Gr33dy (waves) I've been on several buses/threads with you. Lovely to hear that you are 16 weeks now and hopefully you will become more excited and less anxious as your pregnancy goes on.

Hi Pizza Did you see much at your 6 week scan? The reason I ask is although we should try and hold out for as long as we can, I really don't think we'll make it to 8 weeks (another whole month) without knowing things are looking ok. I mentioned to my OH last night that 7 weeks might be a good idea? Oh and congrats on the new job! Smile

pizzakat · 20/05/2015 09:41

Thanks jo! Such a relief, I've worked in a nightclub bar before but this is more of a pub/restaurant. My OH works in te kitchen as a chef and I already know and get along with most of the staff so very excited :)

teenie I asked not to be shown anything at my 6 week scan as I was so scared of developing that attachment at such an early stage, just wanted to know if everything was ok if that makes sense? I think my exact measurement was 6+2 and the midwife said they could see a heartbeat but I don't think that's very common at all... i think 7 weeks would be great to give you that little bit peace of mind xx

Gumblossom · 20/05/2015 10:58

Hello everyone. I have had a particularly anxious day today and decided it would probably do me good to join this thread to get some support whilst I am going mad with anxiety. Cloud and I are old friends from the 40+ ttc thread.

I am 6+1 today and bricking it because I didn't have much in the way of symptoms all day. Finally, tonight, my breast tenderness has returned and I feel a bit nauseous, but not as bad as previously. I have had four losses in the last 4 years and as I am 48 years old I am aware that my chances of miscarrying again are high.

I had my first mmc at 10 weeks (on Christmas day would you believe, after we'd announce our pregnancy to our children), I had an erpc as the baby had died at 8 weeks. 6 months later I had another mmc at 9 weeks, again, baby had died at 8 weeks, had another erpc. Then I had a chemical (lost at 4+3) in 2012 and another chemical at 5 weeks last year.

This time feels like a stronger start. With the chemicals/early losses I never had strong bfp's, but this time I have.

I am so bloody anxious, I have no idea how to get through the first trimester. I keep telling myself that I have no control over it at all, there's not much I can do, so I just need to try and relax and take each day as it comes. But today was hard, after having pretty good symptoms til now, then waking up with almost no breast tenderness and not much of the metallic yucky taste in my mouth.

I have a drs appointment when I am 6+6. She has cared for me with each miscarriage and has been great. I know she'll order reassurance scans for me,and I plan to have one near 8 weeks if possible. The trouble is, I did have good scans with the first two miscarriages and was told the chances of miscarriage was slim after the good scans (I can't remember exactly, but they were around 7-8 weeks), so I am not sure how reassuring they will be.

It is lovely to read on this thread of the babies being born. I really hope I will be one of the success stories too. Smile

northdownmummy · 20/05/2015 11:45

Welcome gumblossom I'm sure you'll find loads of support from the lovely ladies on this thread. I know they've helped keep me sane over the past 17 weeks.

Please don't hesitate to share your anxieties and worries with us all. We may not have the answers but we can help keep you sane

cloudjumper · 20/05/2015 14:04

Hey gum Good to see you here, too!

Sorry, I can't help you with the anxiety, I am exactly the same. It's like walking on eggshells. I try to focus on just taking one day at a time, using the head-in-the-sand approach. Some days are OK, others...well, not. Today I'm slightly freaking out because I had some bright red spotting when I got up this morning. All stopped again now, but it is so exhausting, the constant worry.
Reassurance is scarce for us, there will always be a reason to worry!
Sorry for not coming up with something more useful, but you are not alone xx

mrsdiddlydoo · 20/05/2015 14:12

Hi gum we'll keep you company through the first trimester and beyond... Just take one day at a time. Saying that I barely cope with a day sometimes. It feels so long.

So scan today showed I am bang on my dates at 9+4. Little less than last time, but things are progressing so all is as well as can be.

Great news on the job pizza!

Yokyil · 20/05/2015 14:14

Hi all...am with you all on the anxiety. I don't think it will ever get much easier - had a bad night last night. Had a dream nightmare that I went to the toilet and blood was everywhere. Woke up at 3.45am sweating and nearly in tears, obv had to get up and go to the toilet to check. So have myself stressed out that my neausea wasn't as bad in work today that clearly something is wrong, so decided to POAS (which I haven't don't for 2 weeks!) and the line looked weaker than last time. Have my 10 week appointment 3 weeks tomorrow, I don't know if I can hold out to then - know it will be better to hold off till then but me and patience doesn't work too well Confused
Hope everyone else is keeping well, sorry for the me me me post!!!

northdownmummy · 20/05/2015 15:09

yokyil I did read a warning about POAS after about 8 weeks since the hormone levels are actually too high for the test

Yokyil · 20/05/2015 15:21

Thanks northdown am hoping that's the case - will be 7 wks on Friday. Right through was getting the lines darkening lovely, think the dream just threw me as well! Wanted some form of reassurance that all was okay - not gonna get that from a stick!!!! Hmm
You're from a similar part of the world to me - did you have a 10week appointment? Got my letter through and wondering do you actually get scanned at that stage or if all they do is take info, height weight etc etc??

northdownmummy · 20/05/2015 15:50

Yes my scan was at 10 weeks exactly. Seems they just do things a bit earlier over here

Littlelady33 · 20/05/2015 16:05

Welcome newbies! Yokril I don't know much about this but have always been advised to put down the tests after getting a line, they will probably only worry you more. With my first pregnancy I messed around with them anyway and had constantly darkening lines after my MMC so that taught me to stop. I'm still super anxious at 31 weeks largely around actually giving birth now. Worried something terrible will happen, feeling like no ante natal class can prepare me for what to expect!

Littlelady33 · 20/05/2015 16:20

Sorry just catching up but mrsdiddly great news on scan and pizza congrats on the job!

Gr33dyeggs · 20/05/2015 16:33

It is lovely to see you here teenie Smile.

Any update tori?

Welcome gumblossom