45....and pregnant.....bollocks

[Mexicantortilla]

Just that, how fucking crap is this at my flamin age,
Any advice?

Be at bit more careful if you don't want to fall pregnant at your age?

Sorry but im going to be very unsympathetic! Blissfully happy to be pregnant myself (although a lot younger than you) but currently have a couple of friends struggling to get pregnant who would be very upset by your post!

Alot of women have babies in their 40s and are very happy about it.

Do have any DC OP?

You've got plenty of time to decide if you want to keep the pregnancy going or not. You could put it hypothetically to a friend of the same age and maybe gauge their reaction?

Sanwichbag why bother posting? Someone else's inability to have children has no bearing whatsoever on whether a person should be happy or sad about their pregnancy.

OP- take some time to let it sink in. You dont have to stay pregnant.

Yeah -its pretty crap. Im 43 and couldn't do it again. Dd2 at 35 but if you are fit and healthy etc. Its more wonderful than it is crap. Congratulations

I posted because i'd just read a post about MC and felt offended by this post. It's insensitive. I'm entitled to reply just as you are, although what it's got to do with you I don't know!

I am also 45 OP and am sending big hugs. You must be very shocked.

I also havent made any judgement on how the OP should feel about her pregnancy, nor would I!

I'm a similar age and can well understand why you feel like this. Have you known long ? I agree with taking a bit of time to let the idea sink in.

I posted because i'd just read a post about MC and felt offended by this post. It's insensitive

No its not insensitive. What is insensitive is posting on a theead where a woman has had some news she's finding hard to process and asking for advice just to basically tell her she should have been better at contraception, that you are unsympathetic and that other women are happy being pregnant in their 40's so inother words she should be too!

That is what is insensitive. Go have a word with yourself.

Sandwichbag, the post isn't insensitive. It must shocking for someone to be pregnant unexpectedly. Just because you know someone who can't get pregnant or had a miscarriage is irrelevant to the OP's question. And I had years of failed IVF, miscarriages, an ectopic etc.

Some people just lack empathy.

OP - just let it all sink in for now. Don't worry about your age - it's a number. Just focus on your health and take time to think. What does your DP think?

Just be aware that the risk of mc is significantly higher once you are passed 42. So big deep breath, if you are hoping to keep the pregnancy then masses of good luck and best wishes heading your way.

I posted because i'd just read a post about MC and felt offended by this post. It's insensitive.

What self absorbed bollocks. In the words of Stephen Fry - you're offended? So what?

OP it's a lot to process. Yes it's crap if you weren't planning for it. Take your time. Be kind to yourself

Could turn out to be the best thing that ever happened to you. Hope so.

No help at all, I am afraid, but I am the same age and am massively jealous OP, and you have got me thinking again.....

For you though, I am sorry that it is such a shock and hope that it turns out well for you. Out of sheer curiosity, do you already have children (so that you were presumably relieved to be out of the baby stage for good) or would this be your first?

Also sending flowers

I've had a mc and I'm not offended by this post.
Sorry if you aren't happy with the news OP, I'm 42 now and would be pretty horrified if it happened to me !!!

If the op posted this on that miscarriage thread then that would be insensitive.

She has posted her own in the right place for advice.

Must be a shock...sending you clarity, calm, and

Oh love, I'm 41 and would feel exactly the same as you.
When did you find out?

Don't worry about your age. I know 2 women who both had babies at that age. It must be a shock but if it's meant to be, its meant to be.

How do you feel about having a/another baby?

Let the news sink in OP. I'd be horrified too.

I felt the same way about an unexpected pregnancy this year and I'm only 35. In fact I posted a thread about it and got lots of supportive wonderful advice and in the end we decided to continue with the pregnancy. It did take me a few weeks to stop feeling ambivalent about it, but actually the realisation that I could terminate the pregnancy, and the serious consideration of termination, made me realise that I didn't want to.

Less of the preachy postings though on my thread. I'm well aware that other people have trouble getting pregnant, in fact I've donated eggs once and was about to donate again when I was blindsided by a totally unexpected, unplanned and unwanted pregnancy. I cried and cried and cried. As I was perfectly entitled to.