45....and pregnant.....bollocks

[Mexicantortilla]

Just that, how fucking crap is this at my flamin age,
Any advice?

Sandwichbag If you're offended and find it insensitive that people are posting re pregnancy (and being a mum) in a negative manner, you might not enjoy large parts of mumsnet that ^much6- If it's here for support and advice, it means some one's seeking it, and therefore might not be having a very positive experience?

and I have cose friends that have suffered devastating miscarrages, sill births and suffered the death of a child shortly after birth, and I don't find the op's post offensive.

op, fingers crossed you get your head in the right place and makethechoice that's right for you.

If it helps, pg made my skin glow and hair lovely and thick, and didn't have periods for nine months

I've had 7 miscarriages and I'm not offended by the OP in the least... There's no reason to be!

I second (third, fourth?) taking folic acid while you let it sink in and decide what to do x

What advice I'd offer you would depend on what you intend to do?
What a shock.
Hope you are ok

Can totally understand you being shocked. I am 7 yrs away from 45 and the idea of having another one in 7 years.....well, that would take some getting my head around.

Ignore the professionally offended element here.

Thank you to all, I did not intend to offend anyone. Had my suspicions for a week or so and did a test today but was actually shocked to find two lines. Will take some time to think. I guess I just feel ashamed because of my age, if I was younger I don't think I would have a problem with it. I have 3 DD's, 1 is 19, 1 was 18 last week, and our youngest is 4, she was very much wanted and we love her to bits, she was born 4 weeks after my 41st birthday so I'm already an older mum! But I just feel that I'll be judged now as I'm 45, 40ish was ok and passable, maybe many of you will think I'm now being offensive and talking crap, sorry, it's not intended, thanks for the support.

You're not being offensive at all . I can't say for certain what I would do if I was in the same situation but do whats right for you and sod other peoples opinions. Wishing you lots of luck and happiness

Aw, give yourself some time for the shock to settle.
Your post was not offensive to most of us, truly don't worry (it's impossible to please ALL people ALL of the time)

I was 44 when I had DS4 and although he was planned I was mortified to rock up at the antenatal clinic. My (lovely) consultant reassured me that I was not to worry, her oldest woman he had every delivered had been 56 and all was to be well. And it was
DS4 is now 4, I had a great pregnancy and my 2nd VBAC to deliver him.

Your choice is entirely yours - I agree with everybody who said take folic acid (and vitamin D) and take a bit of time to consider how you feel and what is practical for you.
Have you told anybody yet (other than random internet strangers)?

You poor thing. I'd get the shock of my life and I'm not much younger than you. I'd be embarrassed telling people, like I was 15 not 45. But don't let that influence your decision. I agree with others, let the news sink in. Your first reaction is horror obviously but maybe that will settle in to something else. oh, no, sorry, here

No, no-one......will try to speak to dh soon....

You have no reason to feel ashamed! And anyone who wants to judge you can fuck right off.

What matters is whether you are happy and want this baby.

I totally understand the shock. Look after yourself.

Ach, I do feel for you.
Do speak to him soon - I hope you can talk it through together and he can support you.

Mexican - very best wishes, hope you come to a path that feels right. Sandwich - also speaking as veteran of 7 miscarriages, your comments come across as oddly judged, rather than OP's.

Ooh. OP! I feel for you. I'm 41 and would be in your shoes....

It's not that unusual though these days, is it? To have babies in your 40s? I wouldn't bat an eyelid. Don't feel embarrassed or ashamed OP! Nobody need know it was unplanned and even if they did, so what?

Good luck whatever you decide

I'd be over the moon. Envy envy envy.

and no

I'm 45 and whilst I'd be initially I'd style it out beautifully.

I had ( my only) DS at 46, he was a bit of a shock too. But I'm absolutely delighted to have him, and rather enjoyed being a pregnant geriatric.

Re: it being a bit shameful - I have two words for you - Cherie Blair!

Seriously - if it can happen to Mr an Mrs PM then it can happen to anyone.

Actually I think she might have been 46. That makes you a spring chicken!

OP - have you seen Luisa Dillner's columns in the Guardian from a few years ago? SHe was pregnant again at 47. Link here It's a good read.

It is so not shameful! Rejoice in your continuing fertility.

Btw, I am not the oldest mum at the school gates either

Oscar