steak I second, third, fourth, fifth what everyone else has said - YES it is shit that things are happening this way and that your choice is being denied you and that he is being such a fuckwit, but for now I honestly believe that you need space and most importantly support for you and for Izzy, while you work out what your new life will look like. It isn't the one you wanted and that is so very beyond rubbish, but it's here and if you can at least get an idea of what it looks like chances are you'll feel a lot less apprehensive for yourself and your daughter.
Any sorting out between you and your H can come after that. There's always time. As long as both of you are still breathing, there will be time. Right now it seems like you can't speak to each other without having a row, so just stop trying - now is not the time, but one day will be. IYSWIM.
Joe is still not right, temp went up to 40 before bedtime I'm a bit anxious tbh. Thing is, he still seems pretty unbothered in himself - last time he had a fever he was all glassy eyed and floppy, tonight he was having a little chat and gave me a smile when I started singing to him. He's asleep now, I think - quiet anyway - I have turned the monitor up to 11 so I can hear him breathing Just going to cram some tea and go up to bed with my book, so I can check on him every 20 minutes now and again.